Elle01's avatar
Elle01

Feb. 3, 2024

0
Why do we tell stories?
why we tell stories

The human race need a constant reminder of it's superiority towards other living kind,it sustain this idea by telling stories about grand wars,wins,downfalls,and how it surpassed it.It's the constant need to be part of something,to relate or to be relatable,telling discovery quest in archaeological sites,ancient rituals,and there impact on modern days.Talking about modern days,an increased individuality pushed the the extreme,became poisonous to the cohesion between human beings,the seventh art the finest one when it comes to telling stories stems from this feeling,to beg one another understanding,does it trigger in you what it trigger in me,even for a glimpse in time is there any chance that you and i are being exactly in the same place,with the same thoughts,feelings the same emotions,do you get me finally? can we call ourselves fellows again,can we let go of this armor,for now we care about the other thoughts,we are not scarred to see a drooling vulnerability,for now we recognize one another .

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Student123's avatar
1

The human race needs a constant reminder of it's superiority towards other living kind,i. It sustains this idea by telling stories about grand wars, wins, downfalls, and how it surpassed it.these challenges. It's the constant need to be part of something, or to relate or to be relatable,telling discovery quest in archaeological sites,ancient rituals,and there impact on modern days..¶

Talking about modern daytimes, an increased need for individuality pushed the the extreme,sm became poisonous to the cohesion between human beings,t. The seventh art the finest one when it comes to telling stories stems from this fneeling,to beg one another understanding,dd to belong to one another. Does it trigger in you what it trigger in me,even for a glimpse in time is in me? Is there any chance that you and i are beingre exactly in the same place, with the same thoughts, feelings the same emotions,do you get me finally, and emotions as me?

Súper difficult to read and correct.

Elle01's avatar
Elle01

Feb. 5, 2024

0

thank you nonetheless for doing so !

splinterofchaos's avatar
0

The human race need a constant reminder of it's superiority towards other living kind,i. It sustain this idea by telling stories about grand wars, wins, downfalls, and how it surpassed it.them. It's the constant need to be part of something, to relate or to be relatable, telling a discovery quest in archaeological sites, ancient rituals, and theire impact on modern days. Talking about modern days, an increased individuality pushed the the extreme, became poisonous to the cohesion between human beings,t. The seventh art the finest one when it comes to telling stories stems from this feeling, to beg onefor another's understanding, does it trigger in you what it trigger in me, even for a glimpse in time is there any chance that you and i are being exactly in the same place, with the same thoughts, feelings the same emotions,d? Do you get me finally?

> it sustain this idea by telling stories about grand wars,wins,downfalls,and how it surpassed ~~it~~ **them**.

The ~~-marked text is what I recommend removing, ** marks my addition.

We can't use the singular "it" here because it refers to the many things that happened in those stories. "Them all" would be somewhat stronger wording.

> The seventh art the finest one when it comes to telling stories stems from this feeling,

Sorry, I didn't understand the meaning of this line so I left no suggestions.

cCan we call ourselves fellows again,c? Can we let go of this armor,f? For now we care about the other thoughts, we are not scarred to see a drooling vulnerability,for now that we recognize(?) one another .

I'm not sure if "recognize" is the best word here. Recognize each other for what we are? Or perhaps do you mean understand each other's true nature?

Feedback

Not using spaces after punctuation and breaking your writing up into paragraphs severely harms readability. Other than that, I think I got a sense for what you're trying to say. I look forward to reading the next one.

Elle01's avatar
Elle01

Feb. 4, 2024

0

hi, so ,for this one :The seventh art the finest one when it comes to telling stories stems from this feeling, I meant the feeling of cohesion, belonging, and yes "recognize" in the sense, we recognize each other for what we are, simply human with weakness, vulnerabilities, and flaws.
Thanks a lot for correcting and trying to understand!

why we tell stories

The human race need a constant reminder of it's superiority towards other living kind,it sustain this idea by telling stories about grand wars,wins,downfalls,and how it surpassed it.It's the constant need to be part of something,to relate or to be relatable,telling discovery quest in archaeological sites,ancient rituals,and there impact on modern days.Talking about modern days,an increased individuality pushed the the extreme,became poisonous to the cohesion between human beings,the seventh art the finest one when it comes to telling stories stems from this feeling,to beg one another understanding,does it trigger in you what it trigger in me,even for a glimpse in time is there any chance that you and i are being exactly in the same place,with the same thoughts,feelings the same emotions,do you get me finally?

The human race need a constant reminder of it's superiority towards other living kind,i. It sustain this idea by telling stories about grand wars, wins, downfalls, and how it surpassed it.them. It's the constant need to be part of something, to relate or to be relatable, telling a discovery quest in archaeological sites, ancient rituals, and theire impact on modern days. Talking about modern days, an increased individuality pushed the the extreme, became poisonous to the cohesion between human beings,t. The seventh art the finest one when it comes to telling stories stems from this feeling, to beg onefor another's understanding, does it trigger in you what it trigger in me, even for a glimpse in time is there any chance that you and i are being exactly in the same place, with the same thoughts, feelings the same emotions,d? Do you get me finally?

> it sustain this idea by telling stories about grand wars,wins,downfalls,and how it surpassed ~~it~~ **them**. The ~~-marked text is what I recommend removing, ** marks my addition. We can't use the singular "it" here because it refers to the many things that happened in those stories. "Them all" would be somewhat stronger wording. > The seventh art the finest one when it comes to telling stories stems from this feeling, Sorry, I didn't understand the meaning of this line so I left no suggestions.

The human race needs a constant reminder of it's superiority towards other living kind,i. It sustains this idea by telling stories about grand wars, wins, downfalls, and how it surpassed it.these challenges. It's the constant need to be part of something, or to relate or to be relatable,telling discovery quest in archaeological sites,ancient rituals,and there impact on modern days..¶

Talking about modern daytimes, an increased need for individuality pushed the the extreme,sm became poisonous to the cohesion between human beings,t. The seventh art the finest one when it comes to telling stories stems from this fneeling,to beg one another understanding,dd to belong to one another. Does it trigger in you what it trigger in me,even for a glimpse in time is in me? Is there any chance that you and i are beingre exactly in the same place, with the same thoughts, feelings the same emotions,do you get me finally, and emotions as me?

Súper difficult to read and correct.

can we call ourselves fellows again,can we let go of this armor,for now we care about the other thoughts,we are not scarred to see a drooling vulnerability,for now we recognize one another .

cCan we call ourselves fellows again,c? Can we let go of this armor,f? For now we care about the other thoughts, we are not scarred to see a drooling vulnerability,for now that we recognize(?) one another .

I'm not sure if "recognize" is the best word here. Recognize each other for what we are? Or perhaps do you mean understand each other's true nature?

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