Nov. 27, 2022
What Effects of the G20 on the Future Talents of Hangzhou
With the rapid eco-social development, Hangzhou, the capital city of Zhejiang province, hosted the G20 conference this year, which greatly improved its international recognization and created vast opportunities to its citizens. As the main power of building the city in the future, the youth was influenced by this conference and learned a lot from it. There are many positive effects that imposed on the future young talents, including students, trained workers and young entrepreneurs.
It is a common sense that the youth is the future of a country, so all governments and societies take their growth as a vital task, making serious and overall plan about their cultivation and providing quantity and favorable chance for them. It is a catalyst that G20 played as to inspire the youth. First, it helped to broaden horizons of the youth. Lots of leaders of states gathered in Hangzhou, discussing major issues about all perspectives of the world, such as environmental protection, economic cooperation, society governance, and energy supply. They brought new ideas and views to the youth, inspiring them to focus on and discuss those international problems together. Second, it provided a better Hangzhou for them. Letting Hangzhou known by the world, more and more investments and companies will come to Hangzhou and run offices or branches, which will not only increase the economic growth but also stimulate innovation and creativity of the youth. Last but not least, this conference shared the spirits of cooperation and encouraged the youth to work hard and try more to explore their potentials and possibilities. With the help of our country and the world, the future of Hangzhou must be bright, and the youth will play an increasingly significant role in building it.
To sum up, the great effects of G20 on the future young talents, both physically and psychologically, will gradually do powerful influence to Hangzhou, to China, and even to the world. With proper investment and opportunities, youth will play a pivotal role in economic development.
What Effects of the G20 on the Future Talents of Hangzhou
With the rapid eco-social development, Hangzhou, the capital city of Zhejiang province, hosted the G20 conference this year, which greatly improved its international recognization and created vast opportunities tofor its citizens.
As the main power of building the city in the future, the youth wasere influenced by this conference and learned a lot from it.
There are many positive effects that imposethe conference had on the future young talents, including students, trained workers and young entrepreneurs.
"imposed" has a slight negative tone and has the meaning "forced"
It is a common sense that the youth isare the future of a country, so all governments and societies take their growth as a vital task, making serious and overall plans about their cultivation and providing quantity and favorable chances for them.
It is a catalyst that G20 played as toG20 played an important role in inspireing the youth.
This sentence could confuse readers, maybe rewrite it.
First, it helped to broaden their horizons of the youth.
use a pronoun to avoid repetition
Lots of leaders of stateMany state leaders gathered in Hangzhou, discussing major issues about all perspectives of the world, such as environmental protection, economic cooperation, societyal governance, and energy supply.
They brought new ideas and views to the youth, inspiring them to focus on and discuss those international problems together.
Second, it provided a better Hangzhoucity for them.
We do not usually use proper nouns in this way, consider changing Hangzhou to something else
By Letting Hangzhou be known byto the world, more and more investmentors and companies will come to Hangzhou and run offices or branches, which will not only increase the economic growth but also stimulate innovation and creativity of the youth.
Last but not least, this conference shared the spirits of cooperation and encouraged the youth to work hard and try more to explore their potentials and possibilities.
With the help of our country and the world, the future of Hangzhou must be bright, and the youth will play an increasingly significant role in building it.
To sum up, the great effects of G20 on the future young talents, both physically and psychologically, will gradually do powerful influence to Hangzhou, to China, and even to the world.
the verb to influence does not need to be followed by anything.
With proper investment and opportunities, the youth will play a pivotal role in economic development.
Feedback
1. You use a lot of really powerful verbs and adjectives, like your use of pivotal and stimulate. I am quite impressed.
2. I really liked your use of connecting phrases, like "to sum up" and your use of "first" and "second" to connect your sentences.
3. consider finding a synonym for "the youth" to avoid repetition. You could use "younger generations", "the young people", "the next generation" etc.
4. You use a lot of adjectives and have long sentences. Try to cut down a little bit. Could you communicate the same message in fewer words? This is advice I get a lot. Writing should be clear and effective. See how many words you can cut out without changing the meaning of your sentences.
Nov. 29, 2022
Thank you for your advise and correction! 😊
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What Effects of the G20 on the Future Talents of Hangzhou
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With the rapid eco-social development, Hangzhou, the capital city of Zhejiang province, hosted the G20 conference this year, which greatly improved its international recognization and created vast opportunities to its citizens. With |
|
As the main power of building the city in the future, the youth was influenced by this conference and learned a lot from it. As the main power of building the city in the future, the youth w |
|
There are many positive effects that imposed on the future young talents, including students, trained workers and young entrepreneurs. There are many positive effects that "imposed" has a slight negative tone and has the meaning "forced" |
|
It is a common sense that the youth is the future of a country, so all governments and societies take their growth as a vital task, making serious and overall plan about their cultivation and providing quantity and favorable chance for them. It is |
|
It is a catalyst that G20 played as to inspire the youth.
This sentence could confuse readers, maybe rewrite it. |
|
First, it helped to broaden horizons of the youth. First, it helped to broaden their horizons use a pronoun to avoid repetition |
|
Lots of leaders of states gathered in Hangzhou, discussing major issues about all perspectives of the world, such as environmental protection, economic cooperation, society governance, and energy supply.
|
|
They brought new ideas and views to the youth, inspiring them to focus on and discuss those international problems together. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
|
Second, it provided a better Hangzhou for them. Second, it provided a better We do not usually use proper nouns in this way, consider changing Hangzhou to something else |
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Letting Hangzhou known by the world, more and more investments and companies will come to Hangzhou and run offices or branches, which will not only increase the economic growth but also stimulate innovation and creativity of the youth. By Letting Hangzhou be known |
|
Last but not least, this conference shared the spirits of cooperation and encouraged the youth to work hard and try more to explore their potentials and possibilities. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
|
With the help of our country and the world, the future of Hangzhou must be bright, and the youth will play an increasingly significant role in building it. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
|
To sum up, the great effects of G20 on the future young talents, both physically and psychologically, will gradually do powerful influence to Hangzhou, to China, and even to the world. To sum up, the great effects of G20 on the future young talents, both physically and psychologically, will gradually the verb to influence does not need to be followed by anything. |
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With proper investment and opportunities, youth will play a pivotal role in economic development. With proper investment and opportunities, the youth will play a pivotal role in economic development. |
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