Jan. 22, 2021
I have read a lot of vampire books when I was a teenager and by that time I ask myself the same question, will i dare to be immortal if I get the opportunity?
The truth is that I don't know for sure, sometimes I think that yes, I wanted but there is another days when I don't want the loneliness that come with that choice. That have his good and bad parts.
Being immortal, you can travel all the word without cary about anything else, especially not the time or your purpose, you have all the time of the world to do what you really want to do, and to be whatever you want to be, but, after a years, I think you're going to get bored and sad, you would't be able to have real friends.
So I have to admit that I want both things, be immortal for some time, and get back to be mortal when I choose to. That's my conclusion
Being Immortal
I have read a lot of vampire books when I was a teenager and by that time Iack then I used to ask myself the same question, will i over and over again: would I dare to become immortal if I getwere given the opportunity?
I read a lot of vampire books when I was a teenager and back then I used to ask myself the same question over and over again: would I dare to become immortal if I were given the opportunity?
The truth is that I don't know for sure, s. Sometimes I would think that yes, I wanted to, but there is anwere other days when I doidn't want the loneliness that would come with that choice.
The truth is that I don't know for sure. Sometimes I would think that yes, I wanted to, but there were other days when I didn't want the loneliness that would come with that choice.
That have his good and bad partImmortality has both its pros and cons.
Immortality has both its pros and cons.
BeingAs an immortal, you canould travel all over the world without carying about anything else, especially not the time or your purpose, you. You would have all the time ofin the world to do whatever you really wanted to do, and to be whatever you wanted to be, but. However, after a yearswhile, I think you're going to would get bored and sad, because you wouldn't be able to have any real friends.
As an immortal, you could travel all over the world without caring about anything else, especially not the time or your purpose. You would have all the time in the world to do whatever you really wanted to do, and to be whatever you wanted to be. However, after a while, I think you would get bored and sad because you wouldn't be able to have any real friends.
Your last sentence was very long, so I spilt them into two with 'however'.
Being Immortal
I have read a lot of vampire books when I was a teenager and by thatevery time I would ask myself the same question, will iould I dare to become immortal if I geot the opportunity?
I read a lot of vampire books when I was a teenager and every time I would ask myself the same question, would I dare to become immortal if I got the opportunity?
The truth is that I don't know for sure, s. Sometimes I think that yes, I wantedould want it, but there is anare other days when I don't wanwouldn't the loneliness that would come with that choice.
The truth is that I don't know for sure. Sometimes I think that yes, I would want it, but there are other days when I wouldn't the loneliness that would come with that choice.
That have hiEverything has its good and bad parts.
Everything has its good and bad parts.
In would sound more natural here to say, "pros and cons" instead of, "good and bad parts".
Being immortal, you canould travel all over the word without carying about anything else, especially not the time nor your purpose, you. You would have all the time of the world to do what you really wanted to do, and to be whatever you wanted to be, but. However, after amany years, I think you're going to getd become bored and sad, as you would't be able to have real friends.
Being immortal, you could travel all over the word without caring about anything else, especially not time nor your purpose. You would have all the time of the world to do what you really wanted to do, and to be whatever you wanted to be. However, after many years, I think you'd become bored and sad, as you would't be able to have real friends.
So I have to admit that I want both things, be immortal for some time, and get back to being mortal whenever I choose to. So I have to admit that I want both things, be immortal for some time, and get back to being mortal whenever I choose to.
That's my conclusion. That's my conclusion.
Feedback
Great Job! Just a few corrections! I feel like most of this would've been better to write in the conditional tense (yes, I see the irony in this sentence :) ). I hope these corrections help!
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So I have to admit that I want both things, be immortal for some time, and get back to be mortal when I choose to. So I have to admit that I want both things, be immortal for some time, and get back to being mortal whenever I choose to. So I have to admit that I want both things, be immortal for some time, and get back to being mortal whenever I choose to. |
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Being Immortal This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I have read a lot of vampire books when I was a teenager and by that time I ask myself the same question, will i dare to be immortal if I get the opportunity?
I
I |
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The truth is that I don't know for sure, sometimes I think that yes, I wanted but there is another days when I don't want the loneliness that come with that choice.
The truth is that I don't know for sure
The truth is that I don't know for sure |
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That have his good and bad parts.
In would sound more natural here to say, "pros and cons" instead of, "good and bad parts".
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Being immortal, you can travel all the word without cary about anything else, especially not the time or your purpose, you have all the time of the world to do what you really want to do, and to be whatever you want to be, but, after a years, I think you're going to get bored and sad, you would't be able to have real friends.
Being immortal, you c
Your last sentence was very long, so I spilt them into two with 'however'. |
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That's my conclusion That's my conclusion. That's my conclusion. |
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