July 7, 2025
Nonconformity
In my dream life I wouldn't have to conform to anyone or meet expectations. I would like to live as I want without compulsions. In that life no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do. My life would be mine; my time would be mine; my mind would be mine. It would be amazing, but it's just a dream. In reality, we behave like others want us to in order to keep our safety which might not even be real, our job which we might not even like, or our house that we might not even call "home". In my dream life these absurdities would just be jokes. "Think small, dream big.", they say. We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they come true. Or not...
Correction Settings
Nonconformity
In my dream life, I wouldn't have to conform to anyone or meet expectations. In my dream life, I wouldn't have to conform to anyone or meet expectations.
I would like to live as I want without compulsions.
In that life, no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do. In that life, no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do.
My life would be mine; my time would be mine; my mind would be mine.
It would be amazing, but it's just a dream.
In reality, we behave likehow others want us to in order to keep our safety which might not even be real, our job which we might not even like, or our house that we might not even call "home".
In reality, we behave how others want us to in order to keep our safety which might not even be real, our job which we might not even like, or our house that we might not even call "home".
I'm not sure what you mean by not real... like doesn't exist?
In my dream life these absurdities would just be jokes.
"Think small, dream big.,
"Think small, dream big,
End the quotation with a comma if you use a speech tag after it.
", they say.
" they say.
We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they will come true. We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they will come true.
Or not...
July 7, 2025
Thank you for your feedback!
I meant by "not real" that I think we belive we are in safety in this world if we have a house, a job and surround ourself with others and keep stick to these things by behaving how others want us to, but more often this safety is just fake. We use the word "home" out of habit, we often work somewhere where we don't want to and think it's the best way to live. But I think it's mostly just existence, and in existence safety is just a barrier to change.
July 7, 2025
Oh, let me correct myself quickly, I was in a bit of hurry :D "believe", "ourselves", "keep sticking to",
July 7, 2025
So kind of like security? And then the job and house part are the examples that support your point?
July 7, 2025
Security is a physical safety thing as I know, that's why I used safety instead. And yes, the house and job part are examples, exactly. However, maybe I'm wrong in general and there are places where people live a real life. But in my country, most people live as I said, and without even realizing it's a problem.
July 7, 2025
Ah, security can also be used to mean stability, for example when people say "job security" it's how easily one can find and keep a job.
In that case, I would suggest to maybe start another sentence regarding the job and house. The sentence structure is parallel at the moment (ie. __ which is __, etc.) which might give the impression that safety, job, and house all hold equal roles in the sentence, wherein, really, safety is the argument, while job and house are the supporting points.
July 7, 2025
Interesting idea, I'm sure I'll try it out next time, if I want to use this type of... structure. Thank you. :)
July 8, 2025
My pleasure :)
Nonconformity
In my dream life I wouldn't have to conform to anyone or meet expectations.
I would like to live as I want without compulsions.
My life would be mine; my time would be mine; my mind would be mine.
It would be amazing, but it's just a dream.
In my dream life these absurdities would just be jokes.
"Think small, dream big.,"
"Think small, dream big,"
If a quote isn't ending the sentence, us a comma instead of a period.
", they say.
they say.
Continuation from the previous line.
We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they'll (or they will) come true. We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they'll (or they will) come true.
Or not...
Feedback
Honestly, it was pretty and poetically written. Not much to correct, as if you're going for a more poetic style than literal style, you get more wiggle room to express yourself.
July 7, 2025
Thank you. To be honest, I'm always a little poetic, so it's good news for me. But I need to learn write in English with a more formal/literal style, so I should try to be less poetic sometimes. However, I'm glad to know I slowly getting better.
Nonconformity
In my dream life I wouldn't have to conform to anyone or meet expectations.
I would like to live as I want without compulsions.
In that life no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do. In that life no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do.
"In that life no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like, or what I should do." Would flow more poetically. (Like how you did in the next line)
My life would be mine; my time would be mine; my mind would be mine.
It would be amazing, but it's just a dream.
In reality, we behave like others want us to, in order to keep our safety, which might not even be real, our job which we might not even like, or our house that we might not even call "home". In reality, we behave like others want us to, in order to keep our safety, which might not even be real, our job which we might not even like, or our house that we might not even call "home".
In my dream life these absurdities would just be jokes.
"Think small, dream big.
", they say.
We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they come true.
Or not...
Feedback
I would mistake thee for a native speaker any day of the week and twice on Sunday. Thy writing is literally perfect. The only corrections were, some commas to break up a longer thought, and to suggest a slight change of words just because it sounded slightly better! What I would recommend for thee, though, is to use more complex sentences so that thou gettest more practice with those.
July 7, 2025
Wow, thanks! I try to use more complex sentences, like that you corrected with commas, but yeah... I really need to practice with them. It's still a little difficult for me, but I'm trying. In my native language, I'm the one who writes complex four-line sentences, but I try to think in English, instead of just use it, but it's not going so well yet. Thank you again! :)
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Nonconformity This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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"Think small, dream big. This sentence has been marked as perfect!
"Think small, dream big If a quote isn't ending the sentence, us a comma instead of a period.
"Think small, dream big End the quotation with a comma if you use a speech tag after it. |
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It would be amazing, but it's just a dream. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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In my dream life these absurdities would just be jokes. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Or not... This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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In my dream life I wouldn't have to conform to anyone or meet expectations. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! In my dream life, I wouldn't have to conform to anyone or meet expectations. In my dream life, I wouldn't have to conform to anyone or meet expectations. |
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I would like to live as I want without compulsions. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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In that life no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do. In that life no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do. In that life no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do. "In that life no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like, or what I should do." Would flow more poetically. (Like how you did in the next line) In that life, no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do. In that life, no one could tell me how I should live, what I should like or do. |
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My life would be mine; my time would be mine; my mind would be mine. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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In reality, we behave like others want us to in order to keep our safety which might not even be real, our job which we might not even like, or our house that we might not even call "home". In reality, we behave like others want us to, in order to keep our safety, which might not even be real, our job which we might not even like, or our house that we might not even call "home". In reality, we behave like others want us to, in order to keep our safety, which might not even be real, our job which we might not even like, or our house that we might not even call "home".
In reality, we behave I'm not sure what you mean by not real... like doesn't exist? |
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", they say. This sentence has been marked as perfect!
Continuation from the previous line.
" |
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We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they come true. This sentence has been marked as perfect! We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they'll (or they will) come true. We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they'll (or they will) come true. We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they will come true. We should keep working on our dreams, and maybe one day they will come true. |
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