today
Travel in Australia: Brisbane (1)
To be honest, I'd never imagined taking a trip to Australia because it's too far and I barely knew anything about Australia except for the geographical knowledge I learned in high school—and almost totally forgot afterward. This is my first time visiting a country in the Southern Hemisphere, which I'd also never planned. It all started with the fact that my father and his business partner had planned a business trip to Australia earlier, and my mother persuaded me to join them because it was a rare opportunity. Then my father helped me apply for a 600 visa through a travel agency, and I received it in a few days. I heard that the Australia visa is quite hard to get, so I wasn't expecting it to be approved.
Together with us was a young woman who works for my father. After this trip, she and I have become friends. We visited my father's business partner, Uncle T, in Malaysia, and then we all took a direct flight to Brisbane, where we met an employee, L, who works there for Uncle T and is also Malaysian. The day we arrived in Brisbane was rainy. And I have to mention an interesting fact: I've packed fall and winter clothes twice this year, and it's still summer—once for my spring trip to Hangzhou in April, and this time. Traveling to the Southern Hemisphere means the seasons are different from where I live. I felt relieved to have a chance to get away from this muggy weather for a few days, because summer is always unbearable to me. The weather in Brisbane was so cool and comfortable—it felt like compensation for the autumn and winter I missed out on last year since I moved back to Guangdong, where summer lasts about six months and real autumn and winter haven't come in recent years.
Correction Settings
To be honest, I'd never imagined taking a trip to Australia, because it's too far, and I barely knew anything about Australia except for the geographical knowledge I learned in high school—and almost totally forgot afterward. To be honest, I'd never imagined taking a trip to Australia, because it's too far, and I barely knew anything about Australia except for the geographical knowledge I learned in high school—and almost totally forgot afterward.
independent clause (I'd never imagined taking a trip to Australia) + coordinating conjunction (because) + other independent clause (it's too far) = comma before the conjunction
same thing later: independent clause (it's too far) + coordinating conjunction (and) + other independent clause (I barely knew anything...)
this is stuff that middle/high school students get corrected on so it in no way makes your writing incomprehensible, you're clearly advanced with the language though so I feel like I should add it
This is my first time visiting a country in the Southern Hemisphere, which I'd also never planned. This is my first time visiting a country in the Southern Hemisphere, which I'd also never planned.
"This was" sounds better to me
It all started with the fact that my father and his business partner had planned a business trip to Australia earlier, and my mother persuaded me to join them because it was a rare opportunity.
Then my father helped me apply for a 600 visa through a travel agency, and I received it in a few days.
I heard that the Australia visa is quite hard to get, so I wasn't expecting it to be approved.
Together wWith us was a young woman who works for my father.
With us was a young woman who works for my father.
together + with us is a bit redundant. a more natural phrasing would be "A young woman who works for my father came with us / accompanied us."
After this trip, she and I have become friends.
We visited my father's business partner, Uncle T, in Malaysia, and then we all took a direct flight to Brisbane, where we met an employee, L, who worksed there for Uncle T and is also Malaysian.
We visited my father's business partner, Uncle T, in Malaysia, and then we all took a direct flight to Brisbane, where we met an employee, L, who worked there for Uncle T and is also Malaysian.
The day we arrived in Brisbane was rainy.
And I have to mention an interesting fact: I've packed fall and winter clothes twice this year, and it's still summer—once for my spring trip to Hangzhou in April, and this time. And I have to mention an interesting fact: I've packed fall and winter clothes twice this year, and it's still summer—once for my spring trip to Hangzhou in April, and this time.
The phrasing isn't very natural, I'd write: I've only travelled during Summer, but I've only been packing Fall and Winter clothes, since I've only gone to the Southern Hemisphere this year.
(gets to the point of why it's interesting you had to pack fall/winter clothes, I was confused until I read the following sentence)
Traveling to the Southern Hemisphere means the seasons are different from where I live.
I felt relieved to have a chance to get away from this muggy weather for a few days, because summer is always unbearable to me.
The weather in Brisbane was so cool and comfortable—it felt like compensation for the autumn and winter I missed out on last year since I moved back to Guangdong, where summer lasts about six months and real autumn and winter haven't come in recent years.
Feedback
very good! :)
Travel in Australia: Brisbane (1)
To be honest, I'd never imagined taking a trip to Australia because it's too far and I barely knew anything about Australia except for the geographical knowledge I learned in high school—and almost totally forgot afterward.
This is my first time visiting a country in the Southern Hemisphere, which I'd also never planned.
It all started with the fact that my father and his business partner had planned a business trip to Australia earlier, and my mother persuaded me to join them because it was a rare opportunity.
Then my father helped me apply for a 600 visa through a travel agency, and I received it in a few days.
I heard that thea visa for Australia visa is quite hard to get, so I wasn't expecting it to be approved.
I heard that a visa for Australia is quite hard to get, so I wasn't expecting it to be approved.
Even better if you add either "so quickly" or "at all" to the end of your sentence.
Together with us was a young woman who works for my father.
After this trip, she and I have become friends.
We visited my father's business partner, Uncle T, in Malaysia, and then we all took a direct flight to Brisbane, where we met an employee, L, who works there for Uncle T and is also Malaysian.
The day we arrived in Brisbane was rainy.
And I have to mention an interesting fact: I've packed fall and winter clothes twice this year, and it's still summer—once for my spring trip to Hangzhou in April, and this time.
Traveling to the Southern Hemisphere means the seasons are different from where I live.
I felt relieved to have a chance to get away from this muggy weather for a few days, because summer is always unbearable to me.
The weather in Brisbane was so cool and comfortable—it felt like compensation for the autumn and winter I missed out on last year since I moved back to Guangdong, where summer lasts about six months and real autumn and winter haven't come in recent years.
Feedback
Very, very, very well written! You have marked your English level as "B1", but this seems far above that! Excellent work :)
today
I heard that thea visa for Australia visa is quite hard to get, so I wasn't expecting it to be approved.
Even better if you add either "so quickly" or "at all" to the end of your sentence.
No wonder I felt something was missing in this sentence.
today
Thank you!
Feedback
Pro tip: this is a long piece. I think you're more likely to get shorter pieces corrected. It does look very good, though, based on my skimming of it.
today
Thanks! I forgot to send it in separate parts.
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To be honest, I'd never imagined taking a trip to Australia because it's too far and I barely knew anything about Australia except for the geographical knowledge I learned in high school—and almost totally forgot afterward. This sentence has been marked as perfect! To be honest, I'd never imagined taking a trip to Australia, because it's too far, and I barely knew anything about Australia except for the geographical knowledge I learned in high school—and almost totally forgot afterward. To be honest, I'd never imagined taking a trip to Australia, because it's too far, and I barely knew anything about Australia except for the geographical knowledge I learned in high school—and almost totally forgot afterward. independent clause (I'd never imagined taking a trip to Australia) + coordinating conjunction (because) + other independent clause (it's too far) = comma before the conjunction same thing later: independent clause (it's too far) + coordinating conjunction (and) + other independent clause (I barely knew anything...) this is stuff that middle/high school students get corrected on so it in no way makes your writing incomprehensible, you're clearly advanced with the language though so I feel like I should add it |
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This is my first time visiting a country in the Southern Hemisphere, which I'd also never planned. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This is my first time visiting a country in the Southern Hemisphere, which I'd also never planned. This is my first time visiting a country in the Southern Hemisphere, which I'd also never planned. "This was" sounds better to me |
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It all started with the fact that my father and his business partner had planned a business trip to Australia earlier, and my mother persuaded me to join them because it was a rare opportunity. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Then my father helped me apply for a 600 visa through a travel agency, and I received it in a few days. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I heard that the Australia visa is quite hard to get, so I wasn't expecting it to be approved.
I heard that Even better if you add either "so quickly" or "at all" to the end of your sentence. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Together with us was a young woman who works for my father. This sentence has been marked as perfect!
together + with us is a bit redundant. a more natural phrasing would be "A young woman who works for my father came with us / accompanied us." |
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After this trip, she and I have become friends. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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The day we arrived in Brisbane was rainy. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I used to think all big churches were as old as Sacred Heart Cathedral, but St John's Cathedral and the other cathedrals I visited later all look pretty new. |
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On my way to Archdiocese of Brisbane, I passed by the Historic Mooney Memorial Fountain. |
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There was a plaque that told people it was in memory of a young fireman, James Thomas Mooney. |
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Beside the fountain were big trees and a café—such a shame that I didn't have enough time to sit there for a while. |
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I guessed that was mass time at the cathedral, so I didn't go in and continued on my way to City Botanic Gardens. |
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As a plant lover, I was amazed by the variety of plants in Australia, because some of them also grow in southern China—but here they are much taller and stronger! |
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Luckily, it was. |
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Travel in Australia: Brisbane (1) This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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We visited my father's business partner, Uncle T, in Malaysia, and then we all took a direct flight to Brisbane, where we met an employee, L, who works there for Uncle T and is also Malaysian. This sentence has been marked as perfect!
We visited my father's business partner, Uncle T, in Malaysia, and then we all took a direct flight to Brisbane, where we met an employee, L, who work |
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And I have to mention an interesting fact: I've packed fall and winter clothes twice this year, and it's still summer—once for my spring trip to Hangzhou in April, and this time. This sentence has been marked as perfect! And I have to mention an interesting fact: I've packed fall and winter clothes twice this year, and it's still summer—once for my spring trip to Hangzhou in April, and this time. And I have to mention an interesting fact: I've packed fall and winter clothes twice this year, and it's still summer—once for my spring trip to Hangzhou in April, and this time. The phrasing isn't very natural, I'd write: I've only travelled during Summer, but I've only been packing Fall and Winter clothes, since I've only gone to the Southern Hemisphere this year. (gets to the point of why it's interesting you had to pack fall/winter clothes, I was confused until I read the following sentence) |
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Traveling to the Southern Hemisphere means the seasons are different from where I live. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I felt relieved to have a chance to get away from this muggy weather for a few days, because summer is always unbearable to me. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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The weather in Brisbane was so cool and comfortable—it felt like compensation for the autumn and winter I missed out on last year since I moved back to Guangdong, where summer lasts about six months and real autumn and winter haven't come in recent years. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Travel in Australia: Brisbane |
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Our hotel was located in Spring Hill. |
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We walked to Story Bridge after dinner on the first night. |
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Under the bridge was a street of pubs, and it seemed that local people liked to talk and drink there. |
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The next day, I woke up early and began my walk around the hotel within a 3‑km radius. |
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When I arrived at St John's Cathedral, it was 9 am—too early for tourists. |
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By the time I finished taking photos of the plants in the little garden beside the cathedral and was about to leave, there were still very few people. |
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I have no religion, but I'm always willing to appreciate religious architecture wherever I visit, like most Chinese people. |
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The first church I ever visited was Notre Dame Hall of Luther Catholic Church in Guangzhou several years ago—tiny and lovely. |
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Later, I visited Sacred Heart Cathedral in Guangzhou, which is several times larger than the former one. |
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So I guess the climate in Guangdong isn't quite as good for them, haha. |
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City Botanic Gardens felt more like a big park to me than a proper botanic garden. |
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In the botanic gardens or parks I've visited before, there were usually lots of information signs, but here I only saw a few. |
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After walking around, I returned to the entrance and saw a bridge for pedestrians and bikes—Kangaroo Point Bridge. |
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Somehow, the view from the bridge reminded me of Zhujiang River. |
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I guess some rivers do look similar on rainy days. |
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I was about to walk further along the bridge, but I felt hungry since I tend to skip breakfast when I'm traveling so I can eat more at lunch. |
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On my way to City Botanic Gardens, I've seen a pavement sign that said 'Express Lunch' with prices starting at $19.50. |
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I hesitated between this restaurant and the café near Brisbane River, but my intuition told me the restaurant would be better. |
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I had Wagyu beef, ancient grains and spinach salad, and salsa verde. |
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The food was delicious, and it turned out to be the most memorable single meal of the whole trip. |
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I also learned something from this meal, such as waiting at the entrance for the staff is considered good manners in some countries. |
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In China, eating out is quite casual, and some people act like they're at home. |
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My father gave me some 50-dollar notes, so I tried to pay with cash as much as possible. |
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At the restaurant, I didn't quite catch what the staff said—I only heard the word 'correct'. |
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I guessed they didn't have change, so I needed to pay the exact amount of $24.50. |
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Luckily, I had a 20 and a 5 from buying a SIM card at the airport. |
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I seldom use cash in my daily life, and some restaurants in Malaysia don't accept cash, so I suddenly felt a little confused about using cash in a foreign country. |
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Over the next few days, I kept asking 'Can I pay by cash', and the answer from a girl at the museum was 'Of course'. |
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I guess my question must have sounded quite funny to the locals. |
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It was pouring with rain that afternoon. |
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Even though I took my umbrella, my hair, bag, and trousers got slightly wet. |
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Shortly after we set off, my father found it a bit funny that I had an umbrella in my bag. |
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Ha! |
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Who was the wise one now! |
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Anyone who enjoys walking around should take an umbrella—whether it's sunny or rainy, it's always useful! |
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I spent the whole afternoon sleeping after such a long trip. |
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Then we had Chinese food together and bought some souvenirs at Queen Street Mall. |
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The shops closed at 7 pm, which sounds a bit unbelievable, but it's actually quite nice for people who work. |
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