Jeanne : Comment s'est passé,e l'école ?

Agreement with the subject with "être" as an auxiliary verb

Dolly : EC'était ennuyeux/ennuyant.

Sounds more natural this way
"ennuyeux" is still far more prevalent than "ennuyant"

Elle saute dans la voiture, dramatiquemente manière théâtrale.

"dramatique" is yet another false friend between French in English: something "dramatique" in French always implies sadness and grief (like the loss of someone). A drama is "une pièce de théâtre", not "un drame" which is a specific type of movie genre.

Jeanne regarde sa fille dans le rétroviseur, qui boude toujours.

There's of course no chance to understand the mirror was sulky, but for the sake of style, I'd still write "dans le rétroviseur, Jeanne regarde sa fille qui boude toujours"

Elle sort du parking, obscurcie parplongé dans les ténèbres.

"obscurci par les ténèbres" would be pleonastic, since "obscurcir" already means "to make dark, to darken". However, you can say that something is "plongé" in darkness

Brique rouge et, typique d'une banlieue parfaitechic.

A socio-cultural complement would be necessary here IMO as our "banlieues" aren't necessarily upper middle class/upper class like in North America. In fact, the word itself has the connotation of poor, run-down neighborhoods often plagued with criminality and violence, much like your ghettos. So I'd definitely specify these "banlieues" are wealthy ones to French readers

Dolly en bondit (hors) de la voiture.

Again given the context, readers wouldn't understand Dolly jumps out of the flag, but since the noun the pronoun refers to already stands a few sentences back, it'd be less clumsy to state it again.

Jeanne crie : Les dDevoirs, le pyjama, puis le dîner !

For such a pithy- and curtly-said order, I'd definitely drop the articles

Jeanne entre dans la maison en saisissant un tas de courrier soudans les bras : factures, catalogues et magazines.

"entrer" isn't directly transitive
If she grabs the mail "sous ses bras" in French, she grabs it under her armpits, which would sound peculiar; the mail would definitely be "DANS ses bras" even if her arms are below, lifting the "mail pile"

Jeanne constate de la pisse due chien par terre, en dessous de ses talons.

pisse de chien = dog piss
pisse DU chien = piss from the dog ("dog" is definite in this one, [de+le] = du)

"sous ses talons" would also work

ULe/un bordel.

Both prepositions would be alright, I'd tend to use "le" as in "c'est le bordel" (as if to say, "it's messy" in a general way) but it's a subtlety

Le lavabo'évier plein d'assiettes.

"un évier" is in your kitchen; "un lavabo" is in your bathroom

Elle enfournce une pizza consurgelée dans le four, toujours dans sesen habits de travail.

enfoncer dans un four = enfourner
Food which is sold frozen to be warmed up and eaten is "SURgelée"
être en robe, en jupe, en habits de travail...

Les pPieds nus.

You could drop the article here, following the "être pieds nus" logic

Michael, 41 ans, distingué dans u, en costume et une -cravate, (r)entre la maison.

suit and tie = costume-cravate (it's become a compound word, since both so often come together

Il est grand et mince avec une chevelure complètetous ses cheveux.

Slightly more natural