yesterday
Scuba Diving Experience
My daughter and I went scuba diving yesterday morning, but my wife didn't go with us because she was scared of it. At first we planned to go snorkeling. After arriving at the ticket office, a scenic spot staff suggested and introduced scuba diving to us. My daughter was persuaded and we decided to have a try.
After about twenty minutes on boat, we arrived at the scuba diving spot. I felt a little cold when I first got into the water but it got better quickly. A coach taught me how to breathe with oxygen and put me on the breathing equipment. Then I began to dive into the water. The sight under the water was really really nice. There were many kinds of beautiful fish swimming around me. I reached out to grab them but they swam away quickly. The coach took me out of the water after my oxygen was over. Then I went back on board to wait for my daughter. After about ten minutes she came back. She told me she saw not only beautiful fish but also coral. I thought maybe she dived deeper than me. She was very excited and talked a lot about the scuba diving when we came back to the hotel.
After arriving at the ticket office, a scenic spot staff suggested andtaff member introduced scuba diving to us and suggested that we do it.
Not entirely sure what you mean by "a scenic spot staff"
My daughter was persuaded and, so we decided to havegive it a try.
"So" indicates a causal relationship...like, because my daughter was persuaded, we decided to give it a try.
After about twenty minutes on a boat, we arrived at the scuba diving spot.
A coach taught me how to breathe with oxygen and put me on the breathing equipment on me.
The sights under the water wasere really really nice.
I'm making this plural because I'm assuming that you saw more than one thing under the water.
The coach took me out of the water after my oxygen was overran out.
Then I went back on board the boat to wait for my daughter.
I thought maybe she dioved deeper than me.
Common misconception!
Feedback
Very well written! Just a few small corrections. Please let me know if you have any questions about the corrections that I made!
My daughter was persuaded and we decided to havegive it a try.
After about twenty minutes on the boat, we arrived at the scuba diving spot.
A coach taught me how to breathe wiusing the oxygen tank and put me on the breathing equipment.
Then I began to dive into the underwater.
sounds more natural to say this since you are already in the water
The coach took me out of the water after my oxygen was overran out.
|
Scuba Diving Experience |
|
My daughter and I went scuba diving yesterday morning, but my wife didn't go with us because she was scared of it. |
|
At first we planned to go snorkeling. |
|
After arriving at the ticket office, a scenic spot staff suggested and introduced scuba diving to us. After arriving at the ticket office, a s Not entirely sure what you mean by "a scenic spot staff" |
|
My daughter was persuaded and we decided to have a try. My daughter was persuaded and we decided to My daughter was persuaded "So" indicates a causal relationship...like, because my daughter was persuaded, we decided to give it a try. |
|
After about twenty minutes on boat, we arrived at the scuba diving spot. After about twenty minutes on the boat, we arrived at the scuba diving spot. After about twenty minutes on a boat, we arrived at the scuba diving spot. |
|
I felt a little cold when I first got into the water but it got better quickly. |
|
A coach taught me how to breathe with oxygen and put me on the breathing equipment. A coach taught me how to breathe A coach taught me how to breathe with oxygen and put |
|
Then I began to dive into the water. Then I began to dive sounds more natural to say this since you are already in the water |
|
The sight under the water was really really nice. The sights under the water w I'm making this plural because I'm assuming that you saw more than one thing under the water. |
|
There were many kinds of beautiful fish swimming around me. |
|
I reached out to grab them but they swam away quickly. |
|
The coach took me out of the water after my oxygen was over. The coach took me out of the water after my oxygen The coach took me out of the water after my oxygen |
|
Then I went back on board to wait for my daughter. Then I went back on board the boat to wait for my daughter. |
|
After about ten minutes she came back. |
|
She told me she saw not only beautiful fish but also coral. |
|
I thought maybe she dived deeper than me. I thought maybe she d Common misconception! |
|
She was very excited and talked a lot about the scuba diving when we came back to the hotel. |
You need LangCorrect Premium to access this feature.
Go Premium