Feb. 23, 2021
The Rain
The sky were dark and out of colors, the shadows of the grey clouds surrender the earth, connecting the sky with the ground across the rain, the water touch the floor where humans walks, reclaiming their spot in the earth, making people to run away, trying not to be touch by the rain.
Everyone were inside, escaping of the clouds gift, except for a girl who was outside, standing, cleaning the tables that others has fouled with the help of the rain.
The Rain
The sky wereas dark and out of colorsdull, the shadows of the grey clouds surrendered to the earth, and as the rain connectinged the sky withto the ground across the rain, the water touched the floor where humanspeople walks, reclaiming theirits spot ion the earth, making the people to run away, trying not to beget touched by the rain.
This is quite a long sentence! In my correction, "and as the rain~" breaks up the second and third phrases, so it sounds like "there are shadows", "there is the rain connecting the sky and ground".
Everyone wereas inside, escaping of the clouds' gift, except for a girl who was outside, standingalone, cleaning the tables that others hasd fouled with the help of the rain.
Standing= sounds like she's stood still, doing nothing else. Alone emphasises the fact no one else is there.
Feedback
You have a very impressive vocabulary! I think that were/was is something that even native English speakers find difficult, but keep practising! \o/
Feb. 23, 2021
thanks you for taking time to correct me! I really apreciate it.
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The Rain This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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The sky were dark and out of colors, the shadows of the grey clouds surrender the earth, connecting the sky with the ground across the rain, the water touch the floor where humans walks, reclaiming their spot in the earth, making people to run away, trying not to be touch by the rain. The sky w This is quite a long sentence! In my correction, "and as the rain~" breaks up the second and third phrases, so it sounds like "there are shadows", "there is the rain connecting the sky and ground". |
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Everyone were inside, escaping of the clouds gift, except for a girl who was outside, standing, cleaning the tables that others has fouled with the help of the rain. Everyone w Standing= sounds like she's stood still, doing nothing else. Alone emphasises the fact no one else is there. |
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