kiwy's avatar
kiwy

July 25, 2021

0
The Envy Expression In Her eyes

I sent two jackfruits to my friends tonight. They are couples and they both were middle schoolmates of mine. We haven't been chatted for a long time. When I told them I want to study abroad, I saw the envy expression from the woman. She said that it is a good choice for me, I don't have to live normally as many people do: marry, then have kids, etc. When you are in marriage, you will be trapped by a lot of trivia, then you will be so tired.
They got married when I was in university. I was a little shocked that they would be together. They were so young while the girl had just finished her study and even didn't start to work. We were grew up in a small town where most girls got less attention and finacial support from their families than boys. The woman had studied in a techical school for five years and get a diploma. I thought she will stay in a big city to find a job and have a different life from the other girls who had to stop their study because of poverty.
After got married, she gave birth to a boy soon. Two years later, the little boy has a brother.
Because I was seldom been in my hometown for a long time, we met occassionally. But when chatted, I could that she was unhappy with her marriage life. But she talked little of her sadness. Then I thought she was afraid of telling her friends her real thoughts and feelings. Maybe she was lonely. Since she didn't ask me for help, I couldn't do anything.
And the man had hard time too. He failed in work a few times so he had to ask his father for financial support while he was in a bad relationship with his father in that time.
There is an old saying in China: there are a lot of sadness in the lowly couples.

Corrections

The Envyious Expression In Her eyes

I sent two jackfruits to my friends tonight.

They are a couples and they both were middle schoolmates of mine.

We haven't been chattedspoken for a long time.

When I told them I want to study abroad, I saw the envy expression from the womanthe woman looked jealous.

She said that it is a good choice for me, I don't have to live normally as many people do: marry, then have kids, etc.

When you are in marriaged, you will bare trapped by a lot of trivia, then you will beunimportant stuff. You get so tired.

They got married when I was inat university.

I was a little shocked that they would be together.

They were so young while t. The girl had just finished her studyies and even didn'thadn't even start toed working.

We were grew up in a small town where most girls got less attention and worse financial support from their families than boys did.

The woman had studied in a technical school for five years and geot a diploma.

I thought she willould stay in a big city to find a job and have a different life from the other girls who had to stop their study because of poverties because because they didn't have enough money.

ASoon after got married, she gave birth to a boy soon.

Two years later, the little boy has a brother.

Because I was seldom been indidn't go to my hometown for a long time, we metonly saw each other occassionally.

But when we chatted, I could see that she was unhappy with her marriaged life.

But she talked little of her sadness.

Then I thought she was afraid of telling her friends her real thoughts and feelings.

Maybe she was lonely.

Since she didn't ask me for help, I couldn't do anything.

And the man had a hard time too.

He failed in work a few timessuffered a few setbacks in his career, so he had to ask his father for financial support while he was in a bad. This damaged his relationship with his father in that timfor a while.

There is an old saying in China: there areis a lot of sadness in theamong lowly couples.

Feedback

Good job!

kiwy's avatar
kiwy

July 26, 2021

0

Thank you.

The Envyious Expression In Her eEyes

Or you could say "The Expression of Envy In Her Eyes" - or just "The Envy In Her Eyes".

I sent two jackfruits to my friends tonight.

They are a couples and they both were middle schoolmate friends of mine.

If it was up to me, "middle schoolmates" would be perfectly correct - I like it as an expression very much. But I think to be correct we have to change it a bit, so that "middle school" works as an adjective.

We haven't been chatted for a long time.

When I told them I want to study abroad, I saw the envyious expression from the woman.

I think "the" is okay here because you mentioned this expression in the title! But if you hadn't, definitely "an envious expression".

She said that it is a good choice for me, I don't have to live normally as many people do: marry, then have kids, etc.

When you are in marriaged, you will be trapped by a lot of trivia,have chores to do all the time, and then you will be so tired.

You could say "in a marriage", but this form is much much more common.

"trapped by trivia" is pretty clear, but unusual. I'm just suggesting a more natural thing to say.

They got married when I was in university.

I was a little shocked that they would be together.

They were so young while, the girl had just finished her studyies and even didn'thadn't even start toed working.

I think this is what you mean.

We were grew up in a small town where most girls got less attention and financial support from their families than boys.

The woman had studied in a technical school for five years and geot a diploma.

"got" for past tense.

I thought she will stay inould move to a big city to find a job and have a different life from the other girls who had to stop their studyies because of poverty.

When you stay somewhere, that means you're already there - you *don't* move. On weekends, when you wake up early, you probably stay in bed.

"would" is a future-in-the-past thing - in the past, you thought "this will happen in the future". When, later, we talk about that thought, we say "I thought this would happen".

After got married, she soon gave birth to a boy soon.

Not sure if this was incorrect, but much more natural like this.

Two years later, the little boy has a brother.

Because I washave seldom been in my hometown for a long time, we only met occassionally.

But when we chatted, I could tell that she was unhappy with her marriaged life.

But she talked little of her sadness.

ThenAt the time I thought she was afraid of telling her friends her real thoughts and feelings.

"then" is okay but I think we often avoid saying it in a context like this because it can be unclear whether you mean "at that time" or "next" - like "I went to the shop, then I went home".

Maybe she was lonely.

Since she didn't ask me for help, I couldn't do anything.

And the man had a hard time too.

He failed in work a few times so he had to ask his father for financial support while he was in a bad relationship with his father inat that time.

"failed in work" maybe more naturally something like "he lost his job", "he had career difficulties", "he had problems at work", "problems with his job", things like that.

There is an old saying in China: there areis a lot of sadness in the lowly couples.

Feedback

Sad story :( I hope they at least liked the jackfruit.

kiwy's avatar
kiwy

July 26, 2021

0

When you are in marriaged, you will be trapped by a lot of trivia,have chores to do all the time, and then you will be so tired.

I want to emphasize "be trapped", when sb. most of who are somen is in the situation like that, it means that she can't get out of it easily and has to struggle a lot.

kiwy's avatar
kiwy

July 26, 2021

0

They were so young while, the girl had just finished her studyies and even didn'thadn't even start toed working.

Yep, it is what I mean. Thx.

kiwy's avatar
kiwy

July 26, 2021

0

He failed in work a few times so he had to ask his father for financial support while he was in a bad relationship with his father inat that time.

I want to say that he has changed a few jobs, but he failed all of them.

kiwy's avatar
kiwy

July 26, 2021

0

Haha~ I hope so too.

secretpostman's avatar
secretpostman

July 26, 2021

0

You can definitely use "trapped" there, "trivia" was what sounded a bit strange. "trapped by all your chores", "trapped by domestic life", "trapped by your household work".

The most natural way I can think to say the other is "He couldn't hold down a job" or maybe "He hadn't been able to keep any jobs". But there's lots of ways you could express it. Your explanation was very clear, it was just "failed in work a few times" that was a bit vague.

kiwy's avatar
kiwy

July 27, 2021

0

You can definitely use "trapped" there, "trivia" was what sounded a bit strange. "trapped by all your chores", "trapped by domestic life", "trapped by your household work". The most natural way I can think to say the other is "He couldn't hold down a job" or maybe "He hadn't been able to keep any jobs". But there's lots of ways you could express it. Your explanation was very clear, it was just "failed in work a few times" that was a bit vague.

I get(or got?) it. Thank you!

The Envy Expression In Her eyes


The Envyious Expression In Her eEyes

Or you could say "The Expression of Envy In Her Eyes" - or just "The Envy In Her Eyes".

The Envyious Expression In Her eyes

I sent two jackfruits to my friends tonight.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

They are couples and they both were middle schoolmates of mine.


They are a couples and they both were middle schoolmate friends of mine.

If it was up to me, "middle schoolmates" would be perfectly correct - I like it as an expression very much. But I think to be correct we have to change it a bit, so that "middle school" works as an adjective.

They are a couples and they both were middle schoolmates of mine.

We haven't been chatted for a long time.


We haven't been chatted for a long time.

We haven't been chattedspoken for a long time.

When I told them I want to study abroad, I saw the envy expression from the woman.


When I told them I want to study abroad, I saw the envyious expression from the woman.

I think "the" is okay here because you mentioned this expression in the title! But if you hadn't, definitely "an envious expression".

When I told them I want to study abroad, I saw the envy expression from the womanthe woman looked jealous.

She said that it is a good choice for me, I don't have to live normally as many people do: marry, then have kids, etc.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

When you are in marriage, you will be trapped by a lot of trivia, then you will be so tired.


When you are in marriaged, you will be trapped by a lot of trivia,have chores to do all the time, and then you will be so tired.

You could say "in a marriage", but this form is much much more common. "trapped by trivia" is pretty clear, but unusual. I'm just suggesting a more natural thing to say.

When you are in marriaged, you will bare trapped by a lot of trivia, then you will beunimportant stuff. You get so tired.

They got married when I was in university.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

They got married when I was inat university.

I was a little shocked that they would be together.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I was a little shocked that they would be together.

They were so young while the girl had just finished her study and even didn't start to work.


They were so young while, the girl had just finished her studyies and even didn'thadn't even start toed working.

I think this is what you mean.

They were so young while t. The girl had just finished her studyies and even didn'thadn't even start toed working.

We were grew up in a small town where most girls got less attention and finacial support from their families than boys.


We were grew up in a small town where most girls got less attention and financial support from their families than boys.

We were grew up in a small town where most girls got less attention and worse financial support from their families than boys did.

The woman had studied in a techical school for five years and get a diploma.


The woman had studied in a technical school for five years and geot a diploma.

"got" for past tense.

The woman had studied in a technical school for five years and geot a diploma.

I thought she will stay in a big city to find a job and have a different life from the other girls who had to stop their study because of poverty.


I thought she will stay inould move to a big city to find a job and have a different life from the other girls who had to stop their studyies because of poverty.

When you stay somewhere, that means you're already there - you *don't* move. On weekends, when you wake up early, you probably stay in bed. "would" is a future-in-the-past thing - in the past, you thought "this will happen in the future". When, later, we talk about that thought, we say "I thought this would happen".

I thought she willould stay in a big city to find a job and have a different life from the other girls who had to stop their study because of poverties because because they didn't have enough money.

After got married, she gave birth to a boy soon.


After got married, she soon gave birth to a boy soon.

Not sure if this was incorrect, but much more natural like this.

ASoon after got married, she gave birth to a boy soon.

Two years later, the little boy has a brother.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Because I was seldom been in my hometown for a long time, we met occassionally.


Because I washave seldom been in my hometown for a long time, we only met occassionally.

Because I was seldom been indidn't go to my hometown for a long time, we metonly saw each other occassionally.

But when chatted, I could that she was unhappy with her marriage life.


But when we chatted, I could tell that she was unhappy with her marriaged life.

But when we chatted, I could see that she was unhappy with her marriaged life.

But she talked little of her sadness.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Then I thought she was afraid of telling her friends her real thoughts and feelings.


ThenAt the time I thought she was afraid of telling her friends her real thoughts and feelings.

"then" is okay but I think we often avoid saying it in a context like this because it can be unclear whether you mean "at that time" or "next" - like "I went to the shop, then I went home".

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Maybe she was lonely.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Since she didn't ask me for help, I couldn't do anything.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

And the man had hard time too.


And the man had a hard time too.

And the man had a hard time too.

He failed in work a few times so he had to ask his father for financial support while he was in a bad relationship with his father in that time.


He failed in work a few times so he had to ask his father for financial support while he was in a bad relationship with his father inat that time.

"failed in work" maybe more naturally something like "he lost his job", "he had career difficulties", "he had problems at work", "problems with his job", things like that.

He failed in work a few timessuffered a few setbacks in his career, so he had to ask his father for financial support while he was in a bad. This damaged his relationship with his father in that timfor a while.

There is an old saying in China: there are a lot of sadness in the lowly couples.


There is an old saying in China: there areis a lot of sadness in the lowly couples.

There is an old saying in China: there areis a lot of sadness in theamong lowly couples.

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