Not Diary

I see marriage as a voluntary commitment based on responsibility and trust, but its duration should not be forcibly restricted. A marriage that loses love and respect should not be a prison.

In recent decades, attitudes toward love, family, and marriage have changed dramatically. Economic independence, especially for women, has reduced the traditional need for marriage as a source of safety and financial support. More people now choose to stay single or delay marriage, focusing on authentic love rather than social expectations. The rise of gender equality has also diminished the old notion that marriage is a duty to family or society.

I view these changes positively on the whole. They free individuals from unhappy or forced marriages and allow people to pursue genuine emotional connections. However, I also believe that freedom should not erase responsibility. A family still requires handling daily trifles and social relationships. As Lin Huiyin once demonstrated — she admitted her feelings for another man but chose to uphold her marriage out of responsibility — true commitment lies not in lifelong bondage, but in honesty and the willingness to work on a relationship.

In conclusion, while love is rare and precious, marriage has become more flexible in modern society. The recent shift toward valuing personal fulfillment over lifelong obligation is a healthy development, as long as we do not abandon responsibility.Marriage should be a commitment, but one that is renewed by choice, not by force.

Love and Marriage

The debate between love and marriage has been flaring up for centuries, over whether love is a necessity in marriage, and is far more intense these years. Not only because “solo” has become a trend, but more and more people have stepped out of the grand narrative of love and begun to focus on their true life and love.

Financial independence is undoubtedly an important basis of “free love”, which can eliminate resistance from family and society, since you don’t need to rely on your parents when you buy a house or a car or raise kids. Meanwhile, with the development of economic independence — especially for women — and greater gender equality, the value of marriage in providing financial security and safety has been weakened, which elevates the debate on the meaning and value of marriage to a new level.Personally, I welcome these changes. They make marriage more honest and less of a social duty.

However, that does not mean that family has lost all its meaning. In a family, responsibility must still be taken seriously. A family means that more people- parents, children, and relatives, become part of your intimate sphere,and more trivial matters and social relationships need to be managed. It’s no longer just about responsibility in an intimate relationship, but the bond between generations.

As Jesse says to Celine in Before Sunrise, “If somebody gave me the choice right now to never see you again or to marry you, I would marry you. Maybe it sounds romantic, but a lot of people get married for much less than that.” For me, that “much less” is exactly the point — marriage serves purposes beyond rare love. I believe that marriage should be a commitment, but its duration shouldn’t be restricted. Marriage itself is a kind of ceremony and confirmation. A commitment does not have to last a lifetime to be meaningful; it only requires honesty for as long as it exists. The difference between love and marriage, for me, is so-called commitment. Responsibility, trust and sincerity are the components of commitment. I see love more as an ongoing attitude, while marriage is responsibility and commitment. For me, sincerity marks the boundary, and tolerance sets the limit. As Lin Huiyin once demonstrated — she admitted her feelings for another man but chose to uphold her marriage out of responsibility — true commitment lies not in lifelong bondage, but in honesty and the willingness to work on a relationship.

Anyway, love is rare. Most people end up in marriage not because they have found it, but because marriage serves other purposes — even when some of those purposes have faded. So perhaps the contractual nature of marriage does have its own meaning. It provides a framework for those who love and invest themselves deeply, not as a cage, but as a form of mutual protection.

Here is the new version, since I can’t revise the previous form, I add it here.