Aug. 16, 2023
Slingshot
When I was a child, playing slingshots was one of my hobbies.
I made the slingshots by myself using the primitive materials easily found in the countryside. I made several of them during elementary school.
A slingshot usually consists of three parts: a handle bar, two rubber bands and an oval piece of leather.
The handle bar was very easy to find in the countryside. It was just a y shaped branch. The rubber bands were also very easy to find in families, because women used them to tie their hair. A piece of leather was also easy to find because some worn shoes were made of leather. After you connected the three pieces together, the slingshot was done.
As long as it wasn't school time, l'd like to take my slingshot going around in my village to shoot birds.
There were many different trees in my village and many different birds in the trees. Some birds were very popular in my area. They were sparrows, turtle doves and magpies.
The sparrow was too small to shoot. The turtle doves and the magpie were the best birds to aim at, because they are relatively big birds.
I remember that one time when I shot a magpie, the gravel hit right on its chest. I heard the sound when it was hit by the gravel. I saw a few feathers on its chest falling off. It was seriously hit. It seemed to be dizzy and fell from the tree. But it suddenly flew away one or two seconds right after it fell off. I knew the power was not strong enough to shoot it down.
I remember I shot down about 3-5 birds in total back then, but I can't remember which birds they were.
Even now, I still like to play slingshots, however.
I am not a young boy anymore, so I stopped playing slingshots.
When I was a child, playing with slingshots was one of my hobbies.
We don’t play toys, we play WITH toys.
I made the slingshots by myself using the primitive materials easily found in the countryside.
I made several of them during elementary school.
A slingshot usually consists of three parts: a handle bar, two rubber bands and an oval piece of leather.
“Handle bar” usually refers to the handlebars of a bicycle or motorcycle.
The handle bar was very easy to find in the countryside.
It was just a y -shaped branch.
The rubber bands were also very easy to find in [familiesy homes | our homes | my home], because women used them to tie their hair.
A piece of leather was also easy to find because some worn (worn-out) shoes were made of leather.
Aug. 16, 2023
Thank you very much.
Slingshot
When I was a child, playing slingshots was one of my hobbies.
I made the slingshots by myself using the primitive materials easily found in the countryside.
Here the "the" is optional; usually, with plural nouns, the article "the" is dropped
I made several of them during elementary school.
A slingshot usually consists of three parts: a handle bar, two rubber bands, and an oval piece of leather.
The handle bar was very easy to find in the countryside.
It was just a y shaped branch.
The rubber bands were also very easy to find in familiy homes, because women used them to tie their hair.
You don't find them in your family, but rather, from your home
A piece of leather was also easy to find because some worn shoes were made of leather.
After you connected the three pieces together, the slingshot was donmade.
As long as it wasn't school time, l'd liked to take my slingshot goingand go around in my village to shoot birds.
Stay in the past tense; here it is a conditional
"Around" is already a preposition; "in" is also a preposition--> choose one or the other
There were many different trees in my village, and many different birds in the trees.
Some birds were very popular in my area.
They were sparrows, turtle doves, and magpies.
The sparrows wasere too small to shoot.
The turtle doves and (the) magpies were the best birds at which to aim at, because they are relatively big birds.
I remember that one time when I shot a magpie,: the gravel hit right on its chest.
I heard the sound when it was hit by the gravel.
I saw a few feathers on its chest falling off.
It was seriously hitinjured.
It seemed to be dizzy and fell from the tree.
But it suddenly flew away one or two seconds right after it fell off.
I knew the power was not strong enough to shoot it down.
I remember I shot down about 3-5 birds in total back then, but I can't remember which birds they were.
Even now, I still like to play slingshots, however.
However signals a contradiction, ie. if you liked to play with slingshots, but now you don't.
There is no contradiction here
However, I am not a young boy anymore, so I stopped playing slingshots.
here you can use however
Feedback
Great work, good grammar and spelling; only a few small stylistic and grammatical points.
Aug. 16, 2023
Thank you very much.
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It was seriously hit. It was seriously |
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It seemed to be dizzy and fell from the tree. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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But it suddenly flew away one or two seconds right after it fell off. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I knew the power was not strong enough to shoot it down. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Slingshot This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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When I was a child, playing slingshots was one of my hobbies. This sentence has been marked as perfect! When I was a child, playing with slingshots was one of my hobbies. We don’t play toys, we play WITH toys. |
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I made the slingshots by myself using the primitive materials easily found in the countryside. I made the slingshots by myself using Here the "the" is optional; usually, with plural nouns, the article "the" is dropped This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I made several of them during elementary school. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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A slingshot usually consists of three parts: a handle bar, two rubber bands and an oval piece of leather. A slingshot usually consists of three parts: a handle bar, two rubber bands, and an oval piece of leather. A slingshot usually consists of three parts: a handle “Handle bar” usually refers to the handlebars of a bicycle or motorcycle. |
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The handle bar was very easy to find in the countryside. This sentence has been marked as perfect! The handle |
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It was just a y shaped branch. This sentence has been marked as perfect! It was just a y |
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The rubber bands were also very easy to find in families, because women used them to tie their hair. The rubber bands were also very easy to find in famil You don't find them in your family, but rather, from your home The rubber bands were also very easy to find in [famil |
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A piece of leather was also easy to find because some worn shoes were made of leather. This sentence has been marked as perfect! A piece of leather was also easy to find because some worn (worn-out) shoes were made of leather. |
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After you connected the three pieces together, the slingshot was done. After you connected the three pieces together, the slingshot was |
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As long as it wasn't school time, l'd like to take my slingshot going around in my village to shoot birds. As long as it wasn't school time, l Stay in the past tense; here it is a conditional "Around" is already a preposition; "in" is also a preposition--> choose one or the other |
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There were many different trees in my village and many different birds in the trees. There were many different trees in my village, and many different birds in the trees. |
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Some birds were very popular in my area. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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They were sparrows, turtle doves and magpies. They were sparrows, turtle doves, and magpies. |
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The sparrow was too small to shoot. The sparrows w |
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The turtle doves and the magpie were the best birds to aim at, because they are relatively big birds. The turtle doves and (the) magpies were the best birds at which to aim |
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I remember that one time when I shot a magpie, the gravel hit right on its chest. I remember that one time when I shot a magpie |
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I heard the sound when it was hit by the gravel. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I saw a few feathers on its chest falling off. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I remember I shot down about 3-5 birds in total back then, but I can't remember which birds they were. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Even now, I still like to play slingshots, however. Even now, I still like to play slingshots However signals a contradiction, ie. if you liked to play with slingshots, but now you don't. There is no contradiction here |
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I am not a young boy anymore, so I stopped playing slingshots. However, I am not a young boy anymore, so I stopped playing slingshots. here you can use however |
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