Jan. 14, 2021
Our Sweet Fish
Today, we had some unexpected guests, who made us quite surprised. A neighbor brought us some bream fish of different sizes. When we poured them into a basket, we noticed that some of them were still alive. The large fish were gasping whereas the little ones were jumping up. Seeing them trying so hard to survive, we really couldn't find it in our hearts to let them die.
I quickly went upstaris, where we keep the spare stuff, and brought a large pot down. My sister came to help and filled the pot up with water. Together with Mom, we slowly released the fish into the water. After a minute or so, they came to live and started floating in the water playfully. We gave them some food, which they seemed to like. From time to time, the fish kept their mouths out of the water to get some fresh air.
Had I seen them die in front of my eyes, I would've never brought myself to eat them. Looking at them friskily swimming in the water absolutely made our day.
Correction Settings
Our Sweet Fish
Today, we had some unexpected guests, who made us quite surprised.
My sister came to help and filled up the pot up with water.
My sister came to help and filled up the pot with water.
Either way works but filled up the pot sounds more flowing than filled the pot up :)
Together with Mom, we slowly released the fish into the water.
Feedback
Your paragraph has some minor errors but was corrected by another person. Overall, good job! :)
Jan. 15, 2021
Thank you so much. :)
Our Sweet Fish
Today, we had some unexpected guests, who made us quite surprised.
A neighbor brought us some bream fish of different sizes.
A neighbor brought us some bream of different sizes.
When we poured them into a basket, we noticed that some of them were still alive.
The large fish were gasping whereas the little ones were jumping uparound.
The large fish were gasping whereas the little ones were jumping around.
This sounds more idiomatic to me.
Seeing them trying so hard to survive, we really couldn't find it in our hearts to let them die.
I quickly went upstarirs, where we keep the spare stuff, and brought a large pot down.
I quickly went upstairs, where we keep the spare stuff, and brought a large pot down.
My sister came to help and filled the pot up with water.
Together with Mom, we slowly released the fish into the water.
After a minute or so, they came to livfe and started floatswimming in the water playfully.
After a minute or so, they came to life and started swimming in the water playfully.
"Floating" is generally a passive action, so "floating… playfully" doesn't really work.
We gave them some food, which they seemed to like.
From time to time, the fish keptpushed their mouths out of the water to get some fresh air.
From time to time, the fish pushed their mouths out of the water to get some fresh air.
"Kept" suggests a continued state over a longer period, but I assume that the fish mostly stayed underwater.
Had I seen them die in front of my eyes, I would've never brought myself to eat them.
Looking at them friskily swimming in the water absolutely made our day.
Feedback
Great job! Just some small mistakes.
Jan. 14, 2021
Thank you very much for your help.
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Had I seen them die in front of my eyes, I would've never brought myself to eat them. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Our Sweet Fish This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Today, we had some unexpected guests, who made us quite surprised. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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A neighbor brought us some bream fish of different sizes.
A neighbor brought us some bream |
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When we poured them into a basket, we noticed that some of them were still alive. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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The large fish were gasping whereas the little ones were jumping up.
The large fish were gasping whereas the little ones were jumping This sounds more idiomatic to me. |
|
Seeing them trying so hard to survive, we really couldn't find it in our hearts to let them die. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
|
I quickly went upstaris, where we keep the spare stuff, and brought a large pot down.
I quickly went upsta |
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My sister came to help and filled the pot up with water. This sentence has been marked as perfect!
My sister came to help and filled up the pot Either way works but filled up the pot sounds more flowing than filled the pot up :) |
|
Together with Mom, we slowly released the fish into the water. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
|
After a minute or so, they came to live and started floating in the water playfully.
After a minute or so, they came to li "Floating" is generally a passive action, so "floating… playfully" doesn't really work. |
|
We gave them some food, which they seemed to like. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
|
From time to time, the fish kept their mouths out of the water to get some fresh air.
From time to time, the fish "Kept" suggests a continued state over a longer period, but I assume that the fish mostly stayed underwater. |
|
Looking at them friskily swimming in the water absolutely made our day. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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