Session 4: Improving writing skill journey

Session 4: Improving my writing skills

Write a letter to the employer to recommend your colleague/friend in your letter ¶
• State your reason for writing and say how you know the applicant ¶
• Describe your colleague/friend’s relevant qualifications and skills ¶
• And explain why you are recommending this person for the job ¶
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"¶
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Dear Sir or Madam, ¶
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My name is Anna Le,; I am an old colleague of Stephen's who currently works at BCG and who is currentlynow applying for the position of market researcher for your company.

I added a few linking words - the sentence was well structured, but it was a bit cumbersome and hard to read. (Took out the quotation marks as well)

I am writing this email as his reference letter to youStephen has asked me to provide him with a reference letter for his application.

Made it a bit clearer

I worked with Stephen on several projects, and I believe that he has the appropriate qualifications that will be needed in the research industry, especially when it comes to quantitative research.

good!

His knowledge of statistics impressed me; even though his position is just market researche currently works as an executive, he has made a lot of valuable contributions related to the statistics program of our company.

not wrong but if this were an actual letter I would want more detail on what these contributions actually are (instead of saying he is a master, show us how he mastered it: by that I mean anyone can say they are an expert, but what has he done that earned him this title, e.g he pioneered an Excel course that empowered over 2000 people or sth), and I would put them in the same sentence rather than break them up.

He always analyzes withprovides reasonable statistics behind to bring out actionable insights for his clients.

what type of statistics? not sure what reasonable is in this context?

Moreover, he is also a master at tools that help utilize the workwhen it comes to tools that aid in making the workflow smoother, such as Excel and SPSS.

employers love this phrase "streamline the workflow" or "workflow optimization"

Besides these qualifications, his soft skills are also very goodStephen also has a number of soft skills appropriate for this position.

Goes into more detail and is more natural

He has professional English skills and is highly fluent in both 4 skills.

These are actually hard skills - soft skills are things like teamwork or communication. Moreover, what do you mean fluent in all 4 skills? What are the other skills??

In addition, BOTH - 2 (so both is used when there are 2 of something, you cannot use it for more than 2 - in this case 4 skills)

His excellent communication and teamwork skills have always make all people working with him feel very comfortable.created an inspiring working environment

Sort of what you said, but I took it further with more advanced vocab.

Finally, you should hire him not only becaStephen has a proactive mindset focused of the above qualifications, but he also has a good attitude at work, like a growth mindsen personal and professional growth, and is highly self-motivated, making him a perfect cand, honestly, enthusiasmidate for the job.

Telling companies "you should hire him" can be quite rude and offensive, as if you are educating them on what YOU think works best for them. You can say that in a more indirect way, like I did. The word "honestly" is also too informal in this scenario, and enthusiasm can be changed to self-motivated (both because it sounds better - it's a more advanced word - and because this phrase actually shows up in CVs quite often)

I hope you will give Stephen a chance to have an interview for the next recruitment roundThank you for considering my reference letter and Stephen's application.

To be honest, I would delete this altogether. But if you want to keep it, I would change it to the above.

Sincerely, ¶
Anna Le ¶
Research Manager at BCG"

You don't need quotation marks.

IeltsELTS general writing task 1 - Lesson 2: A work colleague (or student friend) has applied for a new job, and he/she has asked you to write a reference letter to the new employer.

I am writing this email as his reference letter to you.

Grammar is OK, but to sound natural, there's no need for "to you." It's obvious because the letter is addressed to them!

His knowledge of statistics impressed me; even though his position is just a market research executive, he has made a lot of valuable contributions related to the statistics program of our company.

The only grammar mistake is "a", but "market research executive" sounds like a very high title to me, so saying "just" seems weird.

He always analyzes with reasonable statistics behind to bring out actionable insights for clients.

His analysis is always well-supported by the statistics to bring about actionable insights for clients.

Moreover, he is also a master at tools that help utilizeexpedite(?) the work, such as Excel and SPSS.

He has professional English skills and is highly fluent in bothall 4 skills of reading, writing, listening, and speaking.

Gramatically "both" should be "all." As a reference letter, you should list out what those skills are.

Finally, you should hire him not only because of the above qualifications, but he also because he has a good attitude at work, like a growth mindset and, honestly, enthusiasm.

You want parallel grammatical structure: not only because X but also because Y.

Ielts general writing task 1 - Lesson 2: A work colleague (or student friend) has applied for a new job, and he/she has asked you to write a reference letter to the new employer.

What's Ielts? I'd capitalize if it's an abbreviation

I worked with Stephen on several projects, and I believe that he has appropriate qualifications that will be needed infor the research industry, especially quantitative research.

His knowledge of statistics impressed me; even though his position is just market research executive, he has made a lot of valuable contributions related to the statistics programdepartment of our company.

He alwayis analyzses with reasonableare always well-grounded in statistics behind toand bring out actionable insights for clients.

Moreover, he is also a master at tools that help utilize the work,of useful tools such as Excel and SPSS.

He has professional English skills and is highly fluent in both 4 skills.

I don't understand what "fluent in both 4 skills" means here. If you're referring to the previous list of qualifications, I think it could be left out

His excellent communication and teamwork skills always make all people workingeveryone who works with him feel very comfortable.

Finally, you should hire him not only because of the above qualifications, but he also has a goodfor his positive attitude at work, like a growth mindset, and, honestly, enthusiasm.