heyyawn's avatar
heyyawn

July 12, 2021

0
Sentences 34 – 36

1. Jan's discontent had been precipitated by the store which closed before closing time and Jan needed to buy tomorrow's breakfast bread.
2. Scholars began to investigate library's collections in the last century, which is perceived as full of white-led elite narratives and lacking minority perspectives.
3. These documents have illuminated the attitudes of different social groups and have revealed how the authorities administered justice.

gre&gmat
Corrections

1. Jan's discontent had been precipitated by the store which closed before closing time and Janwhile she needed to buy tomorrow'sbread for breakfast breadtomorrow.

2. Scholars began to investigate library's collections in the last century, which isare perceived as full of white-led elitebeing dominated by elitist Caucasian narratives and lacking in minority perspectives.

"white" is fine but is a bit too informal for how this sentence is written.
Same with "full of" Vs "dominated by"

3. These documents have illuminated the attitudes of different social groups and have revealed how the authorities administered justice.

The second "have" is redundant here.

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Good work!

heyyawn's avatar
heyyawn

July 15, 2021

0

Thanks :)

Sentences 34 – 36


1. Jan's discontent had been precipitated by the store which closed before closing time and Jan needed to buy tomorrow's breakfast bread.


1. Jan's discontent had been precipitated by the store which closed before closing time and Janwhile she needed to buy tomorrow'sbread for breakfast breadtomorrow.

2. Scholars began to investigate library's collections in the last century, which is perceived as full of white-led elite narratives and lacking minority perspectives.


2. Scholars began to investigate library's collections in the last century, which isare perceived as full of white-led elitebeing dominated by elitist Caucasian narratives and lacking in minority perspectives.

"white" is fine but is a bit too informal for how this sentence is written. Same with "full of" Vs "dominated by"

3. These documents have illuminated the attitudes of different social groups and have revealed how the authorities administered justice.


3. These documents have illuminated the attitudes of different social groups and have revealed how the authorities administered justice.

The second "have" is redundant here.

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