dmitry_or_dima's avatar
dmitry_or_dima

April 18, 2022

0
roller skating

I don't like sport, but I think that regular activity is necessary for physical and mental health. Especially, if you have a sedentary work, like me. For myself, I chose roller skating, it is a good hobby. Skating gives a necessary activity, also you can do various trick. It improve coordination and switch your brain from routine.

Corrections

Especially, if you have a sedentary workjob, like me.

For myselfPersonally, I chose roller skating, it is a good hobby.

Skating givesis (?) a necessary activity, also you can do. You can perform various tricks as well.

It improves coordination and switches up your brain fromdaily routine.

dmitry_or_dima's avatar
dmitry_or_dima

April 20, 2022

0

thank you!

applebubble's avatar
applebubble

April 21, 2022

0

no prob

rRoller sSkating

Titles are usually capitalized.

I don't like sport, but I think that regular activity is necessary for physical and mental health.

Especially, if you have a sedentary workjob, like me.

For myselfPersonally, I chose roller skating, i. It is a good hobby.

Skating gives a necessary activityis a good way to get regular exercise, also you can do various tricks.

It improves coordination and switches your brain from its usual routine.

dmitry_or_dima's avatar
dmitry_or_dima

April 20, 2022

0

thank you!

Especially, if you have a sedentary workjob, like me.

Job makes more sense than work in this context
"work" is more the place or verb rather than a thing you have
work is the place you go to do your job

Skating gives a necessary activity,provides the necessary exercise and also you can do various tricks.

"gives a necessary activity" just isn't a phrase that would be used in English
because you are talking about "various" tricks you need to use the plural

It improves coordination and switch your brain from routine.

To be honest, I don't know why it is "improves" rather than "improve" it just is
Also i'm not quite sure what you mean by "switch your brain from routine." sorry

dmitry_or_dima's avatar
dmitry_or_dima

April 20, 2022

0

thank you for detail feedback.

I don't like sport, but I think that regular activity is necessary for good physical and mental health.

Especially, if you have a sedentary workjob, like me.

Using the word 'job' in this context sounds more natural. In English, we don't say 'a work' unless 'work' is being used as an adjective, as in, 'a work party'. Instead we would say 'a job' or 'an occupation' among other terms. If you want to use 'work' in this context you could say, 'Especially, if you do sedentary work, like me.'

For myself, I chosPersonally, I like roller skating, it is a good hobby.

It is rare to see 'for myself' at the start of a sentence unless you have just referred to someone else's preferences for something in the previous sentence. Personally works better here. You could also say 'I choose to do roller skating' or 'I decided to take up skating'.

Skating gives a necessary activity, alsoyou the physical activity you need and you can also do various tricks.

It improves coordination and switches your brain from its routine.

You could also say, 'and gives your brain a change from its routine'.

Feedback

Overall very good, I could understand everything. Just a few grammar and stylistic changes to make it read more like a native writer.

dmitry_or_dima's avatar
dmitry_or_dima

April 20, 2022

0

thank you for detailed feedback.

roller skating


rRoller sSkating

Titles are usually capitalized.

I don't like sport, but I think that regular activity is necessary for physical and mental health.


I don't like sport, but I think that regular activity is necessary for good physical and mental health.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Especially, if you have a sedentary work, like me.


Especially, if you have a sedentary workjob, like me.

Using the word 'job' in this context sounds more natural. In English, we don't say 'a work' unless 'work' is being used as an adjective, as in, 'a work party'. Instead we would say 'a job' or 'an occupation' among other terms. If you want to use 'work' in this context you could say, 'Especially, if you do sedentary work, like me.'

Especially, if you have a sedentary workjob, like me.

Job makes more sense than work in this context "work" is more the place or verb rather than a thing you have work is the place you go to do your job

Especially, if you have a sedentary workjob, like me.

Especially, if you have a sedentary workjob, like me.

For myself, I chose roller skating, it is a good hobby.


For myself, I chosPersonally, I like roller skating, it is a good hobby.

It is rare to see 'for myself' at the start of a sentence unless you have just referred to someone else's preferences for something in the previous sentence. Personally works better here. You could also say 'I choose to do roller skating' or 'I decided to take up skating'.

For myselfPersonally, I chose roller skating, i. It is a good hobby.

For myselfPersonally, I chose roller skating, it is a good hobby.

Skating gives a necessary activity, also you can do various trick.


Skating gives a necessary activity, alsoyou the physical activity you need and you can also do various tricks.

Skating gives a necessary activity,provides the necessary exercise and also you can do various tricks.

"gives a necessary activity" just isn't a phrase that would be used in English because you are talking about "various" tricks you need to use the plural

Skating gives a necessary activityis a good way to get regular exercise, also you can do various tricks.

Skating givesis (?) a necessary activity, also you can do. You can perform various tricks as well.

It improve coordination and switch your brain from routine.


It improves coordination and switches your brain from its routine.

You could also say, 'and gives your brain a change from its routine'.

It improves coordination and switch your brain from routine.

To be honest, I don't know why it is "improves" rather than "improve" it just is Also i'm not quite sure what you mean by "switch your brain from routine." sorry

It improves coordination and switches your brain from its usual routine.

It improves coordination and switches up your brain fromdaily routine.

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