maymaymay_'s avatar
maymaymay_

Oct. 8, 2023

1
Please Review My Essay

Some people think that children should begin their education at a very early age. Some think they should begin at least 7 years old. Discuss both vies and give your own opinion.

In the modern era, it has been argue by some that children should start learning formally as early as possible, but others believe that they should wait until they turn 7 years old. From my perspective, i would assert that starting on going to school early is more beneficial than the later one.

In most nations, there are several reasons why parents should not send their children at a very e arly age. First of all, beginning children’s education early cannot allow them to enjoy their childhood. In other words, children who have to go to school may have less time for their hobbies and their peers, adversely affecting their development. A pertinent instance for this is that the lastest news on BBC demonstrated that children who spread less time playing with their friends or doing games that they love would not have more chances to develop their imagination and creativity. Moreover, they are likely to suffer from mental issues due to their stress and anxiety at school. These problems can cause them to rebel and have infavourable view of school, holding a negative attitude towards learning when they get older. Therefore, the impact of starting children’s education at an early age could cause serious problems in the mental health as well as their childhood.

However, there are some benefits for younger people when attending school at an very early age. Firstly, parents tend to resort to sendingn their children to school given that they want their child to develop their self-dependence and overcome their shyness. In classes, children may have numerous opportunities to interact and communicate with their friends, helping the, become more confident in communication. Additionally, the younger an individual is, the easier is is to acquire knowledge and information. As a result, these children would have a head start over their peers when pursuing higher education. Besides, the young can have more chances to find out their natural talents seeing that educational programs are designed to suit not only their ages of children, but also the needs of them. With professional courses, teachers are trained to deliver knowledge in attractive and fun ways, so children may be encouraged to develop their potential advantages as well as become effective learners. Thus, attending school at a very early age would generate various positive outcomes for children in higher education.
In conclusion, sending children at an early age may have both drawbacks and benefits. Nevertheless, i believe that children who are exposed to education from an early age would be likely to improve their soft skills as well as develop their potential talents thoroughly.

Corrections

Please Review My Essay

Some people think that children should begin their education at a very early age.

Some think they should begin by at least 7 years old.

or: "begin before age 7."

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the modern era, it has been argued by some that children should start learning formally as early as possible, but others believe that they should wait until they turn 7 years old.

it is good practice to avoid passive voice "it has been argued by some"
you can also try: "some have argued that children..."

From my perspective, i would assert that starting on going to school early is more beneficial than thestarting later one.

In most nations, there are several reasons why parents should not send their children at a very e arly age.

this is correct, but I think it is clearer to say, "why parents might not send"

First of all, beginning children’s education early candoes not allow them to enjoy their childhood.

In other words, children who have to go to school may have less time for their hobbies and their peers, adversely affecting their development.

A pertinent instance ofor this is that the lastest news on BBCa recent BBC news story that demonstrated thathow children who spreaend less time playing with their friends or doing games that they love would not have morehave fewer chances to develop their imagination and creativity.

Moreover, they are likely to suffer from mental health issues due to their stress and anxiety at school.

I think in UK slang, simply 'mental' can mean 'crazy'

These problems can cause them to rebel and have ian unfavourable view of school, holding a negative attitude towards learning when they get older.

Therefore, the impact of starting children’s education at an early age could cause serious problems inwith their mental health as well as their childhood.

However, there are some benefits for younger people wheno attending school atfrom an very early age.

Firstly, parents tend to resort to sendingnsend their children to school given thatbecause they want their child to develop their self-dependence and overcome their shyness.

'resort to' sounds reluctant, like a worst case scenario.

In classes, children may have numerous opportunities to interact and communicate with their friends, helping the,m become more confident in communication.

Additionally, the younger an individual is, the easier ist is to acquire knowledge and information.

As a result, these children would have a head start over their peers when pursuing higher education.

Besides, the young can have more chances to find out their natural talents seeing thatince educational programs are designed to suit not only their ages of children, but alsochildren and their needs of them.

seeing that > 'seeing as', but not as suitable for an essay

With professional courses, teachers are trained to deliver knowledge in attractive and fun ways, so children may be encouraged to develop their potential advantages as well as become effective learners.

Thus, attending school at a very early age would generate various positive outcomes for children in higher education.

In conclusion, sending children at an early age may have both drawbacks and benefits.

Nevertheless, i believe that children who are exposed to education from an early age would be likely to improve their soft skills as well as develop their potential talents thoroughly.

Feedback

well done!

maymaymay_'s avatar
maymaymay_

Oct. 11, 2023

1

the topic states two opposite view points: the first is about begining as soon as possible, the second is about begin after certain age, 7 years old. so should the second sentence be: they should beging after 7 years old?

Thank you so much for your detailed review. It is really of great help to me. I really appreciate it.

In most nations, there are several reasons why parents should not send their children at a very e arly age.


In most nations, there are several reasons why parents should not send their children at a very e arly age.

this is correct, but I think it is clearer to say, "why parents might not send"

Please Review My Essay


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Some people think that children should begin their education at a very early age.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Some think they should begin at least 7 years old.


Some think they should begin by at least 7 years old.

or: "begin before age 7."

Discuss both vies and give your own opinion.


Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the modern era, it has been argue by some that children should start learning formally as early as possible, but others believe that they should wait until they turn 7 years old.


In the modern era, it has been argued by some that children should start learning formally as early as possible, but others believe that they should wait until they turn 7 years old.

it is good practice to avoid passive voice "it has been argued by some" you can also try: "some have argued that children..."

From my perspective, i would assert that starting on going to school early is more beneficial than the later one.


From my perspective, i would assert that starting on going to school early is more beneficial than thestarting later one.

First of all, beginning children’s education early cannot allow them to enjoy their childhood.


First of all, beginning children’s education early candoes not allow them to enjoy their childhood.

In other words, children who have to go to school may have less time for their hobbies and their peers, adversely affecting their development.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

A pertinent instance for this is that the lastest news on BBC demonstrated that children who spread less time playing with their friends or doing games that they love would not have more chances to develop their imagination and creativity.


A pertinent instance ofor this is that the lastest news on BBCa recent BBC news story that demonstrated thathow children who spreaend less time playing with their friends or doing games that they love would not have morehave fewer chances to develop their imagination and creativity.

Moreover, they are likely to suffer from mental issues due to their stress and anxiety at school.


Moreover, they are likely to suffer from mental health issues due to their stress and anxiety at school.

I think in UK slang, simply 'mental' can mean 'crazy'

These problems can cause them to rebel and have infavourable view of school, holding a negative attitude towards learning when they get older.


These problems can cause them to rebel and have ian unfavourable view of school, holding a negative attitude towards learning when they get older.

Therefore, the impact of starting children’s education at an early age could cause serious problems in the mental health as well as their childhood.


Therefore, the impact of starting children’s education at an early age could cause serious problems inwith their mental health as well as their childhood.

However, there are some benefits for younger people when attending school at an very early age.


However, there are some benefits for younger people wheno attending school atfrom an very early age.

Firstly, parents tend to resort to sendingn their children to school given that they want their child to develop their self-dependence and overcome their shyness.


Firstly, parents tend to resort to sendingnsend their children to school given thatbecause they want their child to develop their self-dependence and overcome their shyness.

'resort to' sounds reluctant, like a worst case scenario.

In classes, children may have numerous opportunities to interact and communicate with their friends, helping the, become more confident in communication.


In classes, children may have numerous opportunities to interact and communicate with their friends, helping the,m become more confident in communication.

Additionally, the younger an individual is, the easier is is to acquire knowledge and information.


Additionally, the younger an individual is, the easier ist is to acquire knowledge and information.

As a result, these children would have a head start over their peers when pursuing higher education.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Besides, the young can have more chances to find out their natural talents seeing that educational programs are designed to suit not only their ages of children, but also the needs of them.


Besides, the young can have more chances to find out their natural talents seeing thatince educational programs are designed to suit not only their ages of children, but alsochildren and their needs of them.

seeing that > 'seeing as', but not as suitable for an essay

With professional courses, teachers are trained to deliver knowledge in attractive and fun ways, so children may be encouraged to develop their potential advantages as well as become effective learners.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Thus, attending school at a very early age would generate various positive outcomes for children in higher education.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

In conclusion, sending children at an early age may have both drawbacks and benefits.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Nevertheless, i believe that children who are exposed to education from an early age would be likely to improve their soft skills as well as develop their potential talents thoroughly.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

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