Nov. 26, 2019
Persuasion speech for the giving of thanks in the work.
I have much preocupation for the celebratory celebration we are having participation as a group together in the celebration of the giving of thank yous because we are it is supposed to give thanks about all the many things that we have and that they give us, but no, we don’t give much thanks in 100 percent, so we say thanks for the family and for the assests and for the school and for the car and for the life, but then they put the food on the table on the plate in front of us and we only eat the turkey and all the other thinks like mash potatoes and green vegetables we discard to the trash and that is no give thank yous, that is the contrary to the give thank yous, that is to say thank yous but no thank yous so they need to no that we can give thank yous. Let’s all do this together. Let’s eat all the potatoes, the mash potatoes, and all the vegetables in the juice they call the gravy, and drink the red drink they give us on the cup, and let’s sho that we can give thank yous for more thinks like the happy birthday, and the planet, and the books, and the vacations. Also, we give thank yous in the beginning of the celebration of the thanks in close eyes and talk a conversation in the mind with the person with give many thanks to, and this is a moment of silence, a moment we put the minds together to stop for a moment, and remember the memories of the things our the peoples who loves us do for us, they give us love, and they bring with us to vacations, and they protect us from the life. So lets not forget to give thanks many for all blessing that exist in the center of our lives and outside our lives holding our hands to be great full and convince others to be exactly like that for to remember and not forget the thanks we have been giving. with this ideas in the mind, put all your good people in your memories, and use this time to talk to the father, and give thanks together that we are here holding hands and to enjoy the food that they will put in the table for us.
Happy giving of thanks.
Persuasion speech for the Thanksgiving of thanks in theat work.
¿Qué querias decir con "Persuasion"?
Let’s all do this together.
Let’s eat all the potatoes, the mashed potatoes, and all the vegetables in the juisauce they call the gravy, and. Let us drink the red drwinke they giserve us on the cup, and let’s show that we can givesay thank yous for more thinksgs, like the happy birthdays, and the planet, and the books, and the vacations.
Also, we give thank yous in the beginning of the celebration of the thanks in close eyes and talk a conversation in the mind with the person with give many thanks to, and this is a moment of silence, a moment we put the minds together to stop for a moment, and remember the memories of the things our the peoples who loves us do for us, they give us love, and they bring with us to vacations, and they protect us from the life.
So lets not forget to give thanks many for all blessing that exist in the center of our lives and outside our lives holding our hands to be great full and convince others to be exactly like that for to remember and not forget the thanks we have been giving.
Happy Thanksgiving of thanks.
Feedback
Voy a darte mis comentarios en Español.
Para las siguientes entradas trata de escribir en oraciones mas cortas. De ese modo podrás organizar mejor tus ideas y por lo tanto expresarte mejor.
Algunas palabras como "giving of thanks" me imagino las traduciste de "Día de acción de gracias"? Para celebraciones o nombres propios siempre es bueno buscar una traducción oficial.
¡Buen trabajo!
Nov. 27, 2019
Agradezco infinitamente todas las correciones que has señalado en este ejercicio de redacción. He tomado cada una de tus recomendaciones y las he aplicado en mi siguiente trabajo.
Finalmente, quiero darte gracias por animarme a seguir escribiendo y lograr mi objetivo de poder expresar ideas en un idioma que no es el mio.
Saludos
Persuasionve speech for the giving of thanks in the work.
I have mucham preoccupation for the celebratory celebration we are having participation as a group together in the celebration of theied with the celebration we have in the name of giving of thank yous because we are it iss. We are supposed to give thanks aboutfor all the many things that we have and that otheyrs give us, but no. However, we don’t give much thanks in 100 percent, so wat all. We say thanks for theour family and for theour assests and for the school and for the, school, car, and for the life,; but then they put thesomeone puts food on the table on the plate in front of us and we only eat the turkey and a. All the other thinkgs like mashed potatoes and green vegetables we discard tothrow in the trash, and that is not giveing thank yous, ts. That is the contrary to the give thank yous, that is to say thank yous but no giving thanks. That is to say, our "thank you"s so they need to no that we can giveare like "no thank you"s.
This sentence is way too long! Please make sure you add sentence boundaries!
Let’s all do this together.
Let’s eat all the potatoes, the mashed potatoes, and all the vegetables in theat juice they call the gravy, and drink the red drink they give us on the cup, and let’s show that we can give thank yous for more thinkgs like the happy birthdays, and the planet, and the books, and the vacations.
This sentence is also a bit long. Consider breaking it up a bit next time.
Also, wWe give thank yous ins at the beginning of the celebration of the thanks inThanksgiving with closed eyes and have a mentalk a conversation in the mind with the person withto whom we give many thanks to, and t. This is a moment of silence, a moment when we put theour minds together to stop for a moment, and remember the memories of the things our thethings peoples who loves us do for us,: they give us love, and they bring withtake us ton vacations, and they protect us from the life.
Again, long sentence!
So let's not forget to give thanks many for all the blessings that exist in the center of our lives and outside of our lives, holding our hands to beand being great efull and convinceing others to be exactly like that for to remember and not forget the thanks we have been givingdo the same.
wWith this ideas in the mind, putkeep all your good people in your memoriesloved ones in mind, and use this time to talk to the fFather, and give thanks together that we are here holding hands, and to enjoy the food that they will be put ion the table for us.
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I'm not sure if you meant "father" as in your actual father or as in the religious "Father". I capitalized it since I felt that you were talking in the religious sense, but I might of course be wrong
Feedback
I would suggest you work on making your thoughts more concise and coherent. Long sentences are very hard to parse and understand correctly!
Nov. 26, 2019
I have mucham preoccupation for the celebratory celebration we are having participation as a group together in the celebration of theied with the celebration we have in the name of giving of thank yous because we are it iss. We are supposed to give thanks aboutfor all the many things that we have and that otheyrs give us, but no. However, we don’t give much thanks in 100 percent, so wat all. We say thanks for theour family and for theour assests and for the school and for the, school, car, and for the life,; but then they put thesomeone puts food on the table on the plate in front of us and we only eat the turkey and a. All the other thinkgs like mashed potatoes and green vegetables we discard tothrow in the trash, and that is not giveing thank yous, ts. That is the contrary to the give thank yous, that is to say thank yous but no giving thanks. That is to say, our "thank you"s so they need to no that we can giveare like "no thank you"s.
i begin to understand what this means, i'll short the sentences for the next sentences. many thanks
Nov. 26, 2019
Also, wWe give thank yous ins at the beginning of the celebration of the thanks inThanksgiving with closed eyes and have a mentalk a conversation in the mind with the person withto whom we give many thanks to, and t. This is a moment of silence, a moment when we put theour minds together to stop for a moment, and remember the memories of the things our thethings peoples who loves us do for us,: they give us love, and they bring withtake us ton vacations, and they protect us from the life.
i check for that and will make short the sentences for the next. what is whom
Nov. 26, 2019
wWith this ideas in the mind, putkeep all your good people in your memoriesloved ones in mind, and use this time to talk to the fFather, and give thanks together that we are here holding hands, and to enjoy the food that they will be put ion the table for us.
¶
many thanks for your time, i talk about the Father, and yes, thank you for the capitals, will check the capitals in my next sentences
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Persuasion speech for the giving of thanks in the work. Persuasi Persuasion speech for ¿Qué querias decir con "Persuasion"? |
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I have much preocupation for the celebratory celebration we are having participation as a group together in the celebration of the giving of thank yous because we are it is supposed to give thanks about all the many things that we have and that they give us, but no, we don’t give much thanks in 100 percent, so we say thanks for the family and for the assests and for the school and for the car and for the life, but then they put the food on the table on the plate in front of us and we only eat the turkey and all the other thinks like mash potatoes and green vegetables we discard to the trash and that is no give thank yous, that is the contrary to the give thank yous, that is to say thank yous but no thank yous so they need to no that we can give thank yous. I This sentence is way too long! Please make sure you add sentence boundaries! |
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Let’s all do this together. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Let’s eat all the potatoes, the mash potatoes, and all the vegetables in the juice they call the gravy, and drink the red drink they give us on the cup, and let’s sho that we can give thank yous for more thinks like the happy birthday, and the planet, and the books, and the vacations. Let’s eat all the potatoes, the mashed potatoes, and all the vegetables in th This sentence is also a bit long. Consider breaking it up a bit next time.
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Also, we give thank yous in the beginning of the celebration of the thanks in close eyes and talk a conversation in the mind with the person with give many thanks to, and this is a moment of silence, a moment we put the minds together to stop for a moment, and remember the memories of the things our the peoples who loves us do for us, they give us love, and they bring with us to vacations, and they protect us from the life.
Again, long sentence! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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So lets not forget to give thanks many for all blessing that exist in the center of our lives and outside our lives holding our hands to be great full and convince others to be exactly like that for to remember and not forget the thanks we have been giving. So let's not forget to give thanks This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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with this ideas in the mind, put all your good people in your memories, and use this time to talk to the father, and give thanks together that we are here holding hands and to enjoy the food that they will put in the table for us.
I'm not sure if you meant "father" as in your actual father or as in the religious "Father". I capitalized it since I felt that you were talking in the religious sense, but I might of course be wrong |
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Happy giving of thanks. Happy Thanksgiving |
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