Why did my sister Wang looked at me with a so nice smile, tsmile so warmly at me? That's because she thought Diana had arranged everything for me to work there. Why did my sister Wang smile so warmly at me? That's because she thought Diana had arranged everything for me to work there.

I'm assuming sister Wang is your real sister and not just an affectionate nickname or something. In which case, although "so nice" could instead be written like "oh-so-nice", it'd sound like you're talking about a lover or something. Also, using "here" sounds weird because the specific place you talk about has not been mentioned yet.

Why sister Wang looked at me with a sosuch a nice smile, that' is because she thought Diana arranged for me to work here. Why sister Wang looked at me with such a nice smile is because she thought Diana arranged for me to work here.

Diana had told my sister Wang that she would have a friend to work inwith at the exhibition center. Diana had told my sister that she would have a friend to work with at the exhibition center.

Just a couple of missing prepositions.

Diana had told sister Wang that she would have a friend to work with in the exhibition center. Diana had told sister Wang that she would have a friend to work with in the exhibition center.

Interestingly, her friend hasdn't arrived at SZ at the time. Interestingly, her friend hadn't arrived at SZ at the time.

Tense and clarification.

Interestingly, her friend hasdn't arrived atin SZ. Interestingly, her friend hadn't arrived in SZ.

Diana's friend - a talented young woman - came here two weeks later, and we became friends. Diana's friend - a talented young woman - came here two weeks later, and we became friends.

Diana's friend - a talented young woman came here two weeks later, we - and I became friends. Diana's friend - a talented young woman came here two weeks later - and I became friends.

また、 Diana's friend, a talented young woman came here two weeks later, and I became friends.

Of course, at the time I didn't know the truth onit would turn out that dway. Of course, at the time I didn't know it would turn out that way.

I don't really understand what you mean by "the truth". I guess you're referring to the fact that you became friends with Diana's acquaintance?

Of course, I didn't know the truth on that day. Of course, I didn't know the truth that day.

My most urgent thingtop priority was to find a job and a place to live tostay for the night. My top priority was to find a job and a place to stay for the night.

"The most urgent thing" or "The most pressing matter at the time" would sound ok grammatically speaking, but "top priority" fits better with the overall tone of the text.

Each of us gatook turns to give a brief introduction one after another, th. There were seven people recruited from the job market who had all graduated from university, and canould speak different levels of English,. I amwas not the worst one (thankfully). Each of us took turns to give a brief introduction. There were seven people recruited from the job market who had all graduated from university, and could speak different levels of English. I was not the worst one (thankfully).

Each of us gave a brief introduction one after another, t. The seven people recruited from the job market all graduated from university, and canould speak different levels of English, I am so I was not the worst one. Each of us gave a brief introduction one after another. The seven people recruited from the job market all graduated from university and could speak different levels of English so I was not the worst one.

The two young girls who I met befothere had many years of experience selling touristm-related items, as they had followed my sister Wang's steps for many years. The two young girls I met there had many years of experience selling tourism-related items, as they had followed my sister's steps for many years.

The two young girls whom I met before had many years of selling tourist items, and they had followed sister Wang for many years. The two young girls whom I met before had many years of selling tourist items and they had followed sister Wang for many years.

I felt a little awkward in my mind because I didn't know how I managed to passed the recruitment. I felt a little awkward because I didn't know how I managed to pass the recruitment.

"Awkward" already implies it's something you feel inside, so adding "in my mind" shouldn't really be necessary.

I felt a little awkward in my mind because I didn't know how I passed the recruitment screening. I felt a little awkward because I didn't know how I passed the recruitment screening.

I mimicked the other newcomers and gave a very short self-introduction for myself,- "I'm Ben, I'm 24 years old, it's nice to meet every one of you here, and. I am passionate to learn from you and our bosseager to work with all of you." I mimicked the other newcomers and gave a very short self-introduction - "I'm Ben, I'm 24 years old, it's nice to meet every one of you here. I am eager to work with all of you."

Usually, the plural "we" would already include the boss in this situation. Also, while using "learn" wouldn't be wrong, if everyone is new at the job then saying "work" makes more sense.

I mimicked other newcomers and gave a very short introduction for myself, "I'm Ben, 24 years old, nice to meet every one of you here, and I am passionate to learn from you and our boss." I mimicked other newcomers and gave a very short introduction, "I'm Ben, 24 years old, nice to meet every one of you here, and I am passionate to learn from you and our boss."

TheA shorter introduction was a better fit for me. A shorter introduction was a better fit for me.

In fact, no one else wanted to listen morehear about the others, - they just wanted to go back home as soon as possible, except for me. In fact, no one else wanted to hear about the others - they just wanted to go home as soon as possible, except for me.

Adding "else" reinforces the idea that you were the only exception. "Just" also adds to the exasperation or eagerness of everyone there.

In fact, no one wanted to listen more about others, they because everyone except for me wanted to go back home as soon as possible except me. In fact, no one wanted to listen more about others because everyone except for me wanted to go back home as soon as possible.

Finally, my sister Wang gavesaid some brief welcomeing words and left rather hurriedly. Finally, my sister said some brief welcoming words and left rather hurriedly.

Overall, I gotsecured the job without being interviewed by anyone. Overall, I secured the job without being interviewed by anyone.

One of the older staff members phoned Diana later, asking her to prepare a room for ther newer staff members -- that night, two boys had no place to live on that nightstay, including me. One of the older staff members phoned Diana later, asking her to prepare a room for the newer staff - that night, two boys had no place to stay, including me.