It's not about whether I like living in Fuyang or not. It's not about whether I like living in Fuyang or not.

It's not whether I like living in Fuyang or not. It's not whether I like living in Fuyang or not

You could also say "it's not about whether or not I like living in Fuyang"

My family is here, my workplace is here, and Fuyang is also my hometown, so I have to live here. My family is here, my workplace is here, and Fuyang is also my hometown.

did you mean "have to live here" or "want to live here" or "need to live here"?

My family is here, myI workplace is here, and Fuyang is also my hometown, so I have to live here. My family is here, I work here, and Fuyang is also my hometown, so I have to live here.

Original is also ok, but I feel like most people would say "I work here" or "I have a job here".

No doubt, I love living here too because it's a clean, tidy, and beautiful city. I love living here too because it's a clean, tidy, and beautiful city.

In this journal entry you use a lot of introductory clauses; this is a place you can eliminate one of them. You could also say "I also love living here" rather than "I love living here too"

No doubt, I lovBut I do like living here too because it's a clean, tidy, and beautiful city. But I do like living here because it's a clean, tidy, and beautiful city.

Clean and tidy mean basically the same thing, so you may want to specify, like: the air is clear, the streets are clean, etc. I'm not sure if it can be counted as a mistake, but "too" in this sentence sounds too much like you mean "I like living there, but I like living here too", even though it's clear that's not what you're saying. It may be perfectly correct grammatically, but it sounds a bit confusing.

In my English learning journey, I have three language partners in total. In my English learning journey, I have three language partners in total.

a more fluid alternative: In my English learning journey, I have a total of three language partners.

In my English learning journey, I have three language partners in total.

You could say "journey to learn English" but either way is fine.

One of them is fromlives Canada, but she is actually Chinese. One of them lives Canada, but she is actually Chinese.

I guess if she's been living in Canada from a young age, you can say "from", but it may be clearer this way.

The other is British, and the third one is an American living in New York, who was originally from Haiti and moved with her parents when she was two or three years old. The other is British, and the third one is an American living in New York, who was originally from Haiti and moved with her parents when she was two or three years old.

The other is British, and the third one is an American living in New York, who was originallymigrated [or emigrated] from Haiti with her parents when she was two or three years old. The other is British, and the third one is an American living in New York, who migrated [or emigrated] from Haiti with her parents when she was two or three years old.

If you say "originally from Haiti" then you would eliminate the rest of the sentence; there's no verb there.

The Another one is British, and the third one is an American living in New York, who was originally from Haiti and moved to New York with her parents when she was two or three years old. Another one is British, and the third one is an American living in New York, who was originally from Haiti and moved to New York with her parents when she was two or three years old.

"The other is.." would work if there were on two.

They are all at a similar age to/as mine. They are all a similar age to/as me.

They are all at a similabout the same age as me. OR We are all about the same age. OR Our ages as minere similar. They are all about the same age as me. OR We are all about the same age. OR Our ages are similar.

grammar point is use of "my age" rather than "mine age"

They a're all at a similarbout the same age as mine. They're all about the same age as me.

Young people don't like communicattalking to/with old people. Young people don't like talking to/with old people.