Dec. 29, 2020
Participating in team sports helps to develop good character
Through the history, sports have been considered as a source of "balance", being seen as a priority in almost any healthy lifestyle. Undoubtedly, participating in team sports develop our capacity of being cooperative as well as our capacity to fraternize with others. Both of them, are conditions of a good character.
Parents should insist on the practice of this kind of sports, not only because are beneficial for the child development, but also because allows him to make contact with others. This constant "sharing" between the child and the group, is unavoidable to ensure a good character.
On the other hand, sport is regarded as a way of relaxment. In the past, sports had had a bad label: people used to think that they were bounding people towards violence. However, nowadays we know that a sport can be helpful to improve our mood.
To sum up, team sports are as important as sports itself in the development of a good character.
A través de la historia, los deportes han sido considerados como una fuente de "balance", siendo vistos como una prioridad para casi cualquier estilo de vida saludable. Indudablemente, participar en deportes de equipos desarrolla nuestra capacidad de ser cooperativos al igual que nuestra capacidad de fraternizar con otros. Los dos, son las condiciones de un buen carácter.
Los padres deberían insistir en la práctica de esta clase de deportes, no sólo porque son beneficios para el desarrollo del niño, sino porque le permite hacer contacto con otros. Este constante "compartir" entre el niño y el grupo, es inevitable para asegurar un buen carácter.
Por otro lado, el deporte es considerado una manera de relajarnos. En el pasado, los deportes habían tenido una mala etiqueta: las personas solían pensar que los deportes estaban llevado a las personas hacia la violencia. Sin embargo, hoy en día nosotros sabemos que los deportes son útiles para mejorar nuestro estado anímico.
Para concluir, los deportes de equipos son tan importantes como los deportes en si mismos en el desarrollo de un buen carácter.
Correction Settings
Through theout history, sports have been considered as a source of "balance", being seen as a priority in almost any healthy lifestyle.
Throughout history, sports have been considered a source of "balance", being seen as a priority in almost any healthy lifestyle.
Undoubtedly, participating in team sports develop our capacity tof being cooperative as well as our capacity to fraternize with others.
Undoubtedly, participating in team sports develop our capacity to be cooperative as well as fraternize with others.
It is technically correct to use "capacity" twice, but usually if we are talking about two different kinds of the same noun, we will shorten it like this.
Both of them, are conditionaspects of a good character.
Both of them are aspects of good character.
Parents should insist on the practice of this kind of sports, not only because they are beneficial for their child's development, but also because allows hithem to make continteract with others.
Parents should insist on the practice of this kind of sports, not only because they are beneficial for their child's development, but also because allows them to interact with others.
Using "them" instead of "him" makes it applicable for both boys and girls. It is correct and more formal to just use "him", but I think if you are trying to sound more general and native-like it is best to use the singular "they"/"them". You could also replace "him" with "him/her"
This constant "sharing" between the child and the group, is unavoidable to ensure ay builds good character.
This constant "sharing" between the child and the group unavoidably builds good character.
On the other hand,Additionally, playing sports is regarded as a waya means of relaxment.ation
Additionally, playing sports is a means of relaxation
Usually if we say "on the other hand," we are about to say something that is opposite of the last point, i.e. why sports is not good for kids.
In the past, sports had had a bad labelreputation: people used to think that they were boundcausing people towards become violencet.
In the past, sports had had a bad reputation: people used to think that they were causing people to become violent.
However, nowadays, we know that a sport can be helpful to improve our mood. However, nowadays, we know that a sport can be helpful to improve our mood.
To sum up, team sports are as important as sports itself in the development of a good character.
To sum up, team sports are as important as sports itself in the development of good character.
Feedback
It's written very nicely, I understand everything you mean to say, just some parts have a few small errors/sound unnatural. Nice job!
Dec. 30, 2020
Thanks a lot!
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Participating in team sports helps to develop good character |
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Through the history, sports have been considered as a source of "balance", being seen as a priority in almost any healthy lifestyle.
Through |
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Undoubtedly, participating in team sports develop our capacity of being cooperative as well as our capacity to fraternize with others.
Undoubtedly, participating in team sports develop our capacity to It is technically correct to use "capacity" twice, but usually if we are talking about two different kinds of the same noun, we will shorten it like this. |
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Both, are conditions of a good character. |
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Parents should insist on the practice of this kind of sports, not only because are beneficial for the child development, but also because allows him to make contact with others.
Parents should insist on the practice of this kind of sports, not only because they are beneficial for their child's development, but also because allows Using "them" instead of "him" makes it applicable for both boys and girls. It is correct and more formal to just use "him", but I think if you are trying to sound more general and native-like it is best to use the singular "they"/"them". You could also replace "him" with "him/her" |
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This constant "sharing" between the child and the group, is unavoidable to ensure a good character.
This constant "sharing" between the child and the group |
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On the other hand, sport is regarded as a way of relaxment.
Usually if we say "on the other hand," we are about to say something that is opposite of the last point, i.e. why sports is not good for kids. |
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In the past, sports had had a bad label: people used to think that they were bounding people towards violence.
In the past, sports had had a bad |
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However, nowadays we know that a sport can be helpful to improve our mood. However, nowadays, we know that a sport can be helpful to improve our mood. However, nowadays, we know that a sport can be helpful to improve our mood. |
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To sum up, team sports are as important as sports itself in the development of a good character.
To sum up, team sports are as important as sports itself in the development of |
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Both of them, are conditions of a good character.
Both of them |
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