June 13, 2020
My younger sister
It is nice to have siblings. I am trying to show my feelings forward them but my younger sister finds it cheesy. I am leaning on them. Most of the time, I feel like youngest one at the home. Our age gap isn't far. My grandma didn't remember us well, and she thinks our younger brother is our oldest.
She is a lawyer, now. Still, she have to deal with internship but university part is closed for her. She didn't want to be lawyer at first but we convinced her to be lawyer. Now, I can feel her passion. I am jeaolus about this, I lost my interest to my major. Even, I had enrolled to architecture with strong passion.
I am proud of my sister.
My younger sister
It is nice to have siblings.
Most of the time, I feel like the youngest one atin the homuse.
For some reason, "in the house" is used more often in this situation than "at home".
Our age gap isn't far small.
My grandma didoesn't remember us well, and she thinks our younger brother is ourthe oldest.
Now, I can feel her passion.
June 15, 2020
Thank you.
My younger sister
It is nice to have siblings.
I am trying to show my feelings fortowards them but my younger sister finds it cheesy.
I am leaningdependent on them.
"Leaning" would be used in a more literal context (i.e. leaning on a table for support); depending/being dependent sounds more natural.
Most of the time, I feel like youngest one at the home.
Our age gap isn't far.
My grandma didoesn't remember us well, and she thinks our younger brother is ourthe oldest.
Verb tense correction; didn't ----> past tense / doesn't -----> present tense (same as "thinks").
She is a lawyer, now.
Comma isn't necessary because it's a short sentence.
She still, she haves to deal with her internship but her university part is closed for her.
She didn't want to be lawyer at first but we convinced her to be lawyerone.
This is a stylistic correction; removing "lawyer" at the end of the sentence lets it not be as repetitive.
Now, I can feel her passion.
I am jeaolous about this, because I lost my interest toin my major.
Inserted "because" to make the transition smoother.
EvBack then, I had enrolled toin architecture with strong passion, [but now I'm not as passionate anymore].
I'm not quite sure what this sentence is supposed to say. Hopefully my correction still portrayed the original meaning. Let me know if you need further clarification with this part
I am proud of my sister.
Feedback
Great job on your writing!
June 13, 2020
EvBack then, I had enrolled toin architecture with strong passion, [but now I'm not as passionate anymore].
That is what I wanted to say, thank you.
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My younger sister This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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It is nice to have siblings. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I am trying to show my feelings forward them but my younger sister finds it cheesy. I am trying to show my feelings |
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I am leaning on them. I am "Leaning" would be used in a more literal context (i.e. leaning on a table for support); depending/being dependent sounds more natural. |
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Most of the time, I feel like youngest one at the home. This sentence has been marked as perfect! Most of the time, I feel like the youngest one For some reason, "in the house" is used more often in this situation than "at home". |
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Our age gap isn't far. This sentence has been marked as perfect! Our age gap is |
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My grandma didn't remember us well, and she thinks our younger brother is our oldest. My grandma d Verb tense correction; didn't ----> past tense / doesn't -----> present tense (same as "thinks"). My grandma d |
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She is a lawyer, now. She is a lawyer Comma isn't necessary because it's a short sentence. |
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Still, she have to deal with internship but university part is closed for her. She still |
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She didn't want to be lawyer at first but we convinced her to be lawyer. She didn't want to be lawyer at first but we convinced her to be This is a stylistic correction; removing "lawyer" at the end of the sentence lets it not be as repetitive. |
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Now, I can feel her passion. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I am jeaolus about this, I lost my interest to my major. I am jea Inserted "because" to make the transition smoother. |
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Even, I had enrolled to architecture with strong passion.
I'm not quite sure what this sentence is supposed to say. Hopefully my correction still portrayed the original meaning. Let me know if you need further clarification with this part |
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I am proud of my sister. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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