May 5, 2025
My First Apartment
My first apartment
I started working when I was eighteen years old, and my first month’s salary was 33.5 Chinese yuan, about 5 USD.
Before I bought my first apartment, my salary was low. When my wife decided to buy an apartment, we only had less than ten thousand Chinese yuan.
In 1998, I was already 31 years old and my son was 8 years old. We couldn't just live in a rented room, so it was time to consider buying our own apartment.
My first apartment was on the fifth floor of a building along a street. It occupied about 90 square meters and cost about 47 thousand Chinese yuan. We borrowed most of the money from our relatives for the apartment.
My family lived there for about 20 years. In about 2018, we sold it because we wanted to upgrade to a new apartment.
My first apartment
¶I started working when I was eighteen years old, and my first month’s salary was 33.5 Chinese yuan, about 5 USD.
¶
Before I bought my first apartment, my salary was low.
When my wife and I decided to buy an apartment, we only had less than ten thousand Chinese yuan.
The sentence sounds more natural with "my wife and I" (since both were involved in the decision) and "we had" sounds smoother than "we only had."
In 1998, I was already 31 years old and my son was 8 years old.
We couldn'’t just live in a rented room anymore, so it was time to consider buying our own apartment.
"Anymore" is added to show that it was no longer an option, making it clearer.
My first apartment was on the fifth floor of a building along a street.
"On a street" is more common and sounds more natural than "along a street."
It occupiedwas about 90 square meters and cost abroutnd 47 thousand Chinese yuan.
"It was" is more natural here, and "around" is better for approximating the price.
We borrowed most of the money from our relatives for the apartmento buy it.
"To buy it" makes the sentence more concise and clear.
My family lived there for about 20 years.
In about 2018, we sold it because we wanted to upgrade to a new apartment.
"In about 2018" is a bit vague. "In 2018" sounds more direct and natural unless you need to be specific about the timing.
Feedback
Your story is clear and easy to follow! Great job!
May 5, 2025
Thank you very much.
My First Apartment
My first apartment
¶I started working when I was eighteen years old, and my first month’s salary was 33.5 Chinese yuan, about 5 USD.
¶
Before I bought my first apartment, my salary was low.
When my wife decided to buy an apartmentone, we only had less than ten thousand Chinese yuan.
Consider replacing "an apartment" with "one", to reduce the number of times you say "apartment". It can quickly get repetitive.
In 1998, I was already 31 years old and my son was 8 years old.
We couldn't just live in a rented room, so it was time to consider buying our own apartment.
My first apartment was on the fifth floor of a building along a street.
It occupied about 90 square meters and cost about 47 thousand Chinese yuan.
We borrowed most of the money from our relatives for the apartment.
"for the apartment" may be omitted since you have already established that the money was used to buy the apartment. Also, you've used the word "apartment" many times now, so it might be good to omit it here.
My family lived there for about 20 years.
In about 2018, we sold it because we wanted to upgrade to a new apartment.
Alternatively, you can write "Around 2018", but of course that expression will be less certain than just writing "In 2018".
May 5, 2025
Thank you very much.
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We borrowed most of the money from our relatives for the apartment. We borrowed most of the money from our relatives "for the apartment" may be omitted since you have already established that the money was used to buy the apartment. Also, you've used the word "apartment" many times now, so it might be good to omit it here. We borrowed most of the money from our relatives "To buy it" makes the sentence more concise and clear. |
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My family lived there for about 20 years. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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In about 2018, we sold it because we wanted to upgrade to a new apartment. In Alternatively, you can write "Around 2018", but of course that expression will be less certain than just writing "In 2018". In "In about 2018" is a bit vague. "In 2018" sounds more direct and natural unless you need to be specific about the timing. |
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My First Apartment This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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My first apartment I started working when I was eighteen years old, and my first month’s salary was 33.5 Chinese yuan, about 5 USD.
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Before I bought my first apartment, my salary was low. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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When my wife decided to buy an apartment, we only had less than ten thousand Chinese yuan. When my wife decided to buy Consider replacing "an apartment" with "one", to reduce the number of times you say "apartment". It can quickly get repetitive. When my wife and I decided to buy an apartment, we The sentence sounds more natural with "my wife and I" (since both were involved in the decision) and "we had" sounds smoother than "we only had." |
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In 1998, I was already 31 years old and my son was 8 years old. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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We couldn't just live in a rented room, so it was time to consider buying our own apartment. This sentence has been marked as perfect! We couldn "Anymore" is added to show that it was no longer an option, making it clearer. |
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My first apartment was on the fifth floor of a building along a street. This sentence has been marked as perfect! My first apartment was on the fifth floor of a building "On a street" is more common and sounds more natural than "along a street." |
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It occupied about 90 square meters and cost about 47 thousand Chinese yuan. This sentence has been marked as perfect! It "It was" is more natural here, and "around" is better for approximating the price. |
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