July 1, 2020
My favorite movie
Today, I'll talk about my favorite movie. I think Armageddon is the best movie I've ever seen. It's a Bruce Willis movie and this story is about meteorite. He is the boss of a drilling petroleum company. He and his co-workers go to the space to drill out meteorite and plant nuclear bomb in that. Then, they blow meteorite up to defend the earth from that. I was so impressed by the last scene, but I won't go into detail about the content because I want you to see it. By the way, I have already seen it about 10 times. I recommend seeing it.
It's a Bruce Willis movie and thise story is about a meteorite.
He is the boss of a drilling petroleumn oil company.
He and his co-workers go to the space to drill out a meteorite and plant a nuclear bomb in thait.
Then, they blow the meteorite up to defend the earth from that.
I'm not sure what you're referring to with "that".
I was sovery impressed by the last scene, but I won't go into detail about the content because I want you to see it.
Feedback
I've never watched that movie, maybe I should now haha.
July 2, 2020
Thank you so much!
Yeah! You should watch right now lol
My favorite movie
Today, I'll talk about my favorite movie.
I think Armageddon is the best movie I've ever seen.
It's a Bruce Willis movie and this story is about a meteorite.
"a" meteorite, because there are many meteorites and we are only talking about one meteorite. As others pointed out, you can shorten it.
Another option is to use the word "it". It's a Bruce Willis movie and it is about a meteorite. "it" can refer back to the subject of the sentence.
He is the boss of a drilling petroleum drilling company. ¶
¶
also can be called an "oil drilling company."
He and his co-workers go to the space to drill outa meteorite and plant nuclear bomb in that.
space referring to outer space is one of those special words that does not require "the".
Again, we use "a" meteorite because we are talking about one meteorite in general.
Then, they blow the meteorite up to defend the earth from that.
In this case, we use "the" meteorite because we are being specific. For example, the cat or the mouse compared to a cat or a mouse.
I was so impressed by the last scene, but I won't go into detail about the content because I want you to see it.
By the way, I have already seen it about 10 times.
I recommend seeing it.
Feedback
This is a good start, but try adding more details for your readers to connect thoughts and make the paper flow. Also, start thinking about taking chances and use conjunctions such as FANBOYS (for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so) to connect clauses together.
July 2, 2020
Thank you for your correction:)
My favorite movie
Today, I'll talk about my favorite movie.
I think Armageddon is the best movie I've ever seen.
It's a Bruce Willis movie and this story is about a meteorite.
I also made the sentence simpler
He is the boss of a drilling petroleum company.
He and his co-workers go to the space to drill out meteorite and plant nuclear bomb in thait.
Then, they blow meteorite up to defend the earth from thabeing hit.
I was sovery impressed by the last scene, but I won't go into detail about the content because I want you to see it.
By the way, I have already seen it about 10 times.
I recommend seeing it.
July 2, 2020
Thanks!
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My favorite movie This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Today, I'll talk about my favorite movie. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I think Armageddon is the best movie I've ever seen. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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It's a Bruce Willis movie and this story is about meteorite. It's a Bruce Willis movie I also made the sentence simpler It's a Bruce Willis movie and this story is about a meteorite. "a" meteorite, because there are many meteorites and we are only talking about one meteorite. As others pointed out, you can shorten it. Another option is to use the word "it". It's a Bruce Willis movie and it is about a meteorite. "it" can refer back to the subject of the sentence. It's a Bruce Willis movie and th |
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He is the boss of a drilling petroleum company. He is the boss of a He is the boss of a He is the boss of a |
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He and his co-workers go to the space to drill out meteorite and plant nuclear bomb in that. He and his co-workers go to He and his co-workers go to space referring to outer space is one of those special words that does not require "the". Again, we use "a" meteorite because we are talking about one meteorite in general. He and his co-workers go to |
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Then, they blow meteorite up to defend the earth from that. Then, they blow meteorite up to defend the earth from Then, they blow the meteorite up to defend the earth from that. In this case, we use "the" meteorite because we are being specific. For example, the cat or the mouse compared to a cat or a mouse. Then, they blow the meteorite up to defend the earth I'm not sure what you're referring to with "that". |
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I was so impressed by the last scene, but I won't go into detail about the content because I want you to see it. I was This sentence has been marked as perfect! I was |
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By the way, I have already seen it about 10 times. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I recommend seeing it. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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