April 14, 2020
letter
Thank you for your yeasterday's email
Concering to your request I have some suggestions to you.
I am pleased to inform you that Safety World won the ISA last year. We are largest manuufacture of oil safety equipment now.
I confirm that we have new emergency escape equipment for you. Could you please send me information about safety needs on Nord?
Please do not hesitate to contact me
I'm attaching photos of new equipment
Best regards, Peter Norman.
lLetter
Thank you for yourthe email you sent yeasterday's email.
Concerning to your request, I have some suggestions to you.
We are now the largest manuufacturer of oil safety equipment now.
Either:
"We are now the largest manufacturer of oil safety equipment." [just became the largest manufacturer]
or
"We are currently the largest manufacturer of oil safety equipment." [already were the largest manufacturer]
I can confirm that we have new emergency escape equipment for you.
Could you please send me information about safety needs on Nord?
Not sure what Nord is - could be "Nord" or "The Nord" depending on what it is.
Please do not hesitate to contact me
I'm have attaching ed photos of the new equipment
Feedback
Pretty good. I held back on some corrections, as I'd need more context :)
letter
Thank you for your yeasterday's emailemail from yesterday.
Concerning to your request, I have some suggestions tofor you.
From the rest of the content from this email, I would change this to "Regarding your request, I am pleased to inform you ..."
I am pleased to inform you that Safety World won the ISA last year.
We are largest manuufacturer of oil safety equipment now.
I confirm that we have new emergency escape equipment for you.
Could you please send me information about safety needs on Nord?
Please do not hesitate to contact me.
I'm attaching photos of new equipment.
I would put this sentence before the sentence saying, "Please do not hesitate to contact me."
Feedback
When we write an email, typically we try to do it in paragraph form instead of separate lines. I would re-write it like this:
Dear ____________,
Thank you for your email from yesterday.
Regarding your request, I am pleased to inform you that Safety World won the ISA last year. We are largest manufacturer of oil safety equipment now. I confirm that we have new emergency escape equipment for you. Could you please send me information about safety needs on Nord?
I'm attaching photos of new equipment.
Please do not hesitate to contact me!
Best regards,
Peter Norman
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letter This sentence has been marked as perfect!
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Thank you for your yeasterday's email Thank you for your Thank you for |
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Concering to your request I have some suggestions to you. Concerning From the rest of the content from this email, I would change this to "Regarding your request, I am pleased to inform you ..." Concerning |
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I am pleased to inform you that Safety World won the ISA last year. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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We are largest manuufacture of oil safety equipment now. We are largest manu We are now the largest manu Either: "We are now the largest manufacturer of oil safety equipment." [just became the largest manufacturer] or "We are currently the largest manufacturer of oil safety equipment." [already were the largest manufacturer] |
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I confirm that we have new emergency escape equipment for you. This sentence has been marked as perfect! I can confirm that |
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Could you please send me information about safety needs on Nord? This sentence has been marked as perfect! Could you please send me information about safety needs on Nord? Not sure what Nord is - could be "Nord" or "The Nord" depending on what it is. |
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Please do not hesitate to contact me Please do not hesitate to contact me. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I'm attaching photos of new equipment I'm attaching photos of new equipment. I would put this sentence before the sentence saying, "Please do not hesitate to contact me." I |
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Best regards, Peter Norman. |
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