michiru's avatar
michiru

Dec. 1, 2024

0
Just In One Year

Last year, I went to see my aunt.
While I was at it, I went to a hair salon just opened near the aunt's home.
A hairdresser who was in charge of me was very polite and thoughtful, and cut my hair nicely.
But the place is far from my place, so I hadn't visited the salon for a long time.
Yesterday I happened to have an opportunity to visit my aunt, so I went to the salon for the first time in a year.

Surprisingly, the hairdresser's attitude has been changed.
He seemed unmotivated and irritated.
I felt like I was treated poorly, and the finished look wasn't as nice as last year.
I don't know what happened to him, but I'm sad to see his attitude changed that much just in one year.
I reckon I won't go there again.


昨年、叔母に会いに行ったついでに、叔母の家の近くにある、オープンして間もないヘアサロンに行った。
担当のお兄さんはすごく丁寧で、気を遣ってくれて上手にカットしてくれた。
場所が遠いのでずっと行っていなかったが、昨日たまたま叔母に会いに行く機会があり、1年ぶりにそのヘアサロンに行ってみた。

驚いたことに、お兄さんの態度は変わっていた。やる気がないのかイライラしており、雑に扱われ、カットも昨年に比べいまいちだった。
何があったかわからないが、たった1年でこんなに変わるものかと、ちょっと悲しかった。
もう二度と行かないと思う。

Corrections

In Just In One Year

Last year, I went to see my aunt.

"see" is fine!

You could say "visit"

While I was at it, there, I went to a hair salon that had just opened near the aunt'sr home.

You can use "her" because you made it clear you were talking about "aunt" in the previous sentence.

AThe hairdresser/stylist who was taking charge of me was very polite and thoughtful, and cut my hair nicelyreally well.

But the placesalon is far from my placwhere I live, so I hadn't visited the salon for a long time.

Perfect use of 「hadn't」

Yesterday, I happened to have an opportunity to visit my aunt, so I went to the salon for the first time in (about/over) a year.

Surprisingly, the hairdresser's attitude has been changed.

Or:
The hairdresser's attitude was very different

He seemed unmotivated and irritated.

I felt like I was treated poorly, and the finished look wasn't as nice as last year.

I don't know what happened to him, but I'm sad to see his attitude has changed that much in just in one year.

I reckon I won't go there again.

Feedback

Very well done. Some very natural language in your post.

A year can be a very long time if you work in a place that doesn't treat you well!

michiru's avatar
michiru

Dec. 3, 2024

0

Thank you very much for correcting my English again!
I'm so happy you said that.

In Just In One Year

This sounds more natural, because we say things like "In just one year, a lot has changed." Although, "just in one year" is also gramatically correct, it feels like it carries less impact.

Last year, I went to see my aunt.

While I was at it, there, I went to a hair salon that had just opened near themy aunt's home.

AThe hairdresser who was in charge of mestyling my hair was very polite and thoughtful, and cut my hair nicely.

"Being in charge of someone" typically means that they're like a boss/manager giving you orders. In English, we say that hairdressers "style hair" so when they're serving people, they're "styling someone's hair". It's not the most intuitive thing, though.

But the place is far from my place, so I hadven't visited the salon forin a long time.

Yesterday, I happened to have anthe opportunity to visit my aunt [again], so I went to the salon for the first time in a year.

Surprisingly, the hairdresser's attitude has been changed.

He seemed unmotivated and irritated.

I felt like I was treated poorly, and the finished look wasn't as nice as last year.

I don't know what happened to him, but I'm sad to see that his attitude has changed that much in just in one year.

I reckon I won't go there again.

Feedback

Great job! Sad to hear that the hair dresser's attitude soured over the course of a year. It's a bit expected though within the service industry, but we can only guess what the circumstances were. Hopefully, you had a nice time with your aunt! And hopefully you'll also find a new hairdresser that'll be in a better mood and will style your hair to your expectations.

michiru's avatar
michiru

Dec. 3, 2024

0

Thank you very much for the corrections and the advice.
What you said makes my day!

While I was at it, I went to a hair salon that just opened near themy aunt's home.

AThe hairdresser who was in charge of me was very polite and thoughtful, and cut my hair nicely.

But the placeThe salon is far from my place, so I hadn've not visited the salon forin a long time.

Yesterday, I happened to have an opportunity to visit my aunt, so I went to the salon for the first time in a year.

Surprisingly, the hairdresser's attitude has been changed since last year.

I don't know what happened to him, but. I'm sad to see that his attitude changed that muchdrastically in just in one year.

I reckon I won't go there again.

Feedback

Great job!

Hmm… I wonder if the hairdresser was just having a bad day. 🧐

michiru's avatar
michiru

Dec. 3, 2024

0

Thank you very much for the corrections!

He seemed unmotivated and irritated.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I felt like I was treated poorly, and the finished look wasn't as nice as last year.


I felt like I was treated poorly, and the finished look wasn't as nice as last year.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I don't know what happened to him, but I'm sad to see his attitude changed that much just in one year.


I don't know what happened to him, but. I'm sad to see that his attitude changed that muchdrastically in just in one year.

I don't know what happened to him, but I'm sad to see that his attitude has changed that much in just in one year.

I don't know what happened to him, but I'm sad to see his attitude has changed that much in just in one year.

I reckon I won't go there again.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Just In One Year


In Just In One Year

This sounds more natural, because we say things like "In just one year, a lot has changed." Although, "just in one year" is also gramatically correct, it feels like it carries less impact.

In Just In One Year

Last year, I went to see my aunt.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Last year, I went to see my aunt.

"see" is fine! You could say "visit"

While I was at it, I went to a hair salon just opened near the aunt's home.


While I was at it, I went to a hair salon that just opened near themy aunt's home.

While I was at it, there, I went to a hair salon that had just opened near themy aunt's home.

While I was at it, there, I went to a hair salon that had just opened near the aunt'sr home.

You can use "her" because you made it clear you were talking about "aunt" in the previous sentence.

A hairdresser who was in charge of me was very polite and thoughtful, and cut my hair nicely.


AThe hairdresser who was in charge of me was very polite and thoughtful, and cut my hair nicely.

AThe hairdresser who was in charge of mestyling my hair was very polite and thoughtful, and cut my hair nicely.

"Being in charge of someone" typically means that they're like a boss/manager giving you orders. In English, we say that hairdressers "style hair" so when they're serving people, they're "styling someone's hair". It's not the most intuitive thing, though.

AThe hairdresser/stylist who was taking charge of me was very polite and thoughtful, and cut my hair nicelyreally well.

But the place is far from my place, so I hadn't visited the salon for a long time.


But the placeThe salon is far from my place, so I hadn've not visited the salon forin a long time.

But the place is far from my place, so I hadven't visited the salon forin a long time.

But the placesalon is far from my placwhere I live, so I hadn't visited the salon for a long time.

Perfect use of 「hadn't」

Surprisingly, the hairdresser's attitude has been changed.


Surprisingly, the hairdresser's attitude has been changed since last year.

Surprisingly, the hairdresser's attitude has been changed.

Surprisingly, the hairdresser's attitude has been changed.

Or: The hairdresser's attitude was very different

Yesterday I happened to have an opportunity to visit my aunt, so I went to the salon for the first time in a year.


Yesterday, I happened to have an opportunity to visit my aunt, so I went to the salon for the first time in a year.

Yesterday, I happened to have anthe opportunity to visit my aunt [again], so I went to the salon for the first time in a year.

Yesterday, I happened to have an opportunity to visit my aunt, so I went to the salon for the first time in (about/over) a year.

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