March 6, 2021
Journal
My family used to have an adorable, petite terrier with beautiful, silky hair, named ‘B’. He died 5 years ago.
Although many years have passed since his death, I still think of him pretty often. It’s because he was my first pet.
We bought him from a pet store, which (later we learned) probably brought baby puppies from ‘puppy mills’, where notoriously, puppies are bred and raised in highly unsanitary, poor conditions. It was probably this, that he always had a poor health. Since he was young, he had low immunity and carried lots of allergies, and therefore frequently catching a cold and sometimes even needing my parents to drive him emergently to hospital.
He loved to eat and would always beg for food when we were eating a meal. But he had too many allergies so his skin broke out whenever we gave him meats.
Unlike other dogs, he was afraid to go out for a walk because he was taken out to hospital too frequently when he was a baby. I know we should have taken him to some trainer or gotten some professional help about it, but my family really didn't know any better at that time.
He was 16 when he died. He almost lived to his full life span, without major health issues when he was older. However, despite the fact we did our best to raise him well, we always feel sorry for him that we couldn't have done better.
I hope ‘B’ is happy in the heaven now.
Thank you for having brought joy and happiness to my family, and I’m sorry we couldn't have done better to you, B.
I hope you are well and happy now.
My family used to have an adorable, petite terrier with beautiful, silky hair, named ‘B’.
He died 5 years ago.
Although many years have passed since his death, I still think of him pretty often.
It’s because he was my first pet.
We bought him from a pet store, which (later we learned) probably brought baby puppies from ‘puppy mills’, where notoriously, puppies are bred and raised in highly unsanitary, poor conditions.
It waThis is probably this, thatwhy he always had a poor health.
I corrected this to sound more natural.
Since he was young, he had low immunity and carriehad lots of allergies, and. He therefore frequently catching aught colds and sometimes even needinged my parents to drive him emergently to hospital.to the hospital for emergencies.
He loved to eat and would always beg for food when we were eating a meal.
But he had too many allergies so his skin broke out whenever we gave him meats.
Unlike other dogs, he was afraid to go out for a walk because he was taken out toto the hospital too frequently when he was a baby.
I know we should have taken him to some trainer or gotten some professional help about it, but my family really didn't know any better at that time.
He was 16 when he died.
He almost lived to his full life span, without major health issues when he was older.
However, despite the fact we did our best to raise him well, we always feel sorry for him that we couldn't have done better.
I hope ‘B’ is happy in the heaven now.
Thank you for having brought joy and happiness to my family, and I’m sorry we couldn't have done better to you, B.
I hope you are well and happy now.
Feedback
This very good. The corrections I made are rather minor and would sound more natural.
March 7, 2021
!Thank you so much for the corrections and comments..! 🙏🏻🐵🐵
My family used to have an adorable, petite terrier with beautiful, silky hair, named ‘B’B.
We bought him from a pet store, which (later we learned) probably brought baby puppies from ‘puppy mills’, where, notoriously, puppies are bred and raised in highly unsanitary, poor conditions.
I assume you mean the past tense of "to buy" (bought) rather than "to bring" (brought) here.
It was probably because of this, that he always had a poor health.
Since he was young, he had low immunity and carrieda poor immune system and suffered from lots of allergies, and t. Therefore he frequently catchingught a cold, and sometimes, in emergencies, he even needinged my parents to drive him emergently to hospital.
But he had too many allergies, so his skin broke out whenever we gave him meats.
In normal speech "meat" is a noncount noun.
Unlike other dogs, he was afraid to go out for a walk because he was taken out to hospital too frequently when he was a baby.
You could leave the "out" here, but "taken to hospital" is a collocation, so I think sounds a bit better this way.
I know we should have taken him to somea trainer or gotten some professional help about itfor him, but my family really didn't know any better at that time.
He almost lived to his fullfor the average life span, without of a dog of his breed; without suffering from any major health issues when he was older.
However, despite the fact we did our best to raise him well, we always feel sorry for him that we couldn't have done better for him.
I hope ‘B’B is happy in the hHeaven now.
Thank you for having brought joy and happiness to my family, and I’m sorry we couldn't have done better toby you, B.
March 7, 2021
Thank you! 🙏🏻😀
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He died 5 years ago. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Journal |
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My family used to have a cute dog, named ‘B’. |
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Although many years have passed since his death, I still think of him pretty often. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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It’s because he was my first pet, and therefore he was somewhat like my first love^^; (I always thought about him, while I was out, etc. ) |
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We bought him from a pet store, which probably brought baby puppies from ‘puppy mills’, where notoriously, puppies are bred and raised in highly unsanitary, poor conditions. |
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It was probably this, that he always had a poor health. It was probably because of this
I corrected this to sound more natural. |
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Since he was young, he had low immunity and carried lots of allergies, and therefore frequently catching a cold and sometimes even needing my parents to drive him emergently to hospital. Since he was young, he had Since he was young |
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He loved to eat and would always beg for food when we were eating a meal. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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But he had too many allergies so his skin broke out whenever we gave him meats. But he had too many allergies, so his skin broke out whenever we gave him meat In normal speech "meat" is a noncount noun. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Unlike other dogs, he was afraid to go out for a walk because he was taken out to hospital too frequently when he was a baby. Unlike other dogs, he was afraid to go out for a walk because he was taken You could leave the "out" here, but "taken to hospital" is a collocation, so I think sounds a bit better this way. Unlike other dogs, he was afraid to go out for a walk because he was taken |
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I know we should have taken him to some trainer or gotten professional help about it, but my family really didn't know any better at that time. |
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He was 16 when he died. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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He almost lived to his full life span, without major health issues when he was older. He almost lived This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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However, despite the fact we did our best to raise him, we always feel sorry for him that we couldn't have done better. |
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I hope ‘B’ is happy in the heaven now. I hope This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Thank you always, and I’m sorry, B. |
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My family used to have a cute, petite terrier with beautiful silky hair, named ‘B’. |
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I know we should have taken him to some trainer or gotten some professional help about it, but my family really didn't know any better at that time. I know we should have taken him to This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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However, despite the fact we did our best to raise him well, we always feel sorry for him that we couldn't have done better. However, despite the fact we did our best to raise him well, we always feel sorry This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Thank you for always having brought joy and happiness to my family, and I’m sorry we couldnt have done better to you, B. I hope you are well and happy now. |
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Thank you for having brought joy and happiness to my family, and I’m sorry we couldnt have done better to you, B. |
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I hope you are well and happy now. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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We bought him from a pet store, which (later we learned) probably brought baby puppies from ‘puppy mills’, where notoriously, puppies are bred and raised in highly unsanitary, poor conditions. We bought him from a pet store, which (later we learned) probably b I assume you mean the past tense of "to buy" (bought) rather than "to bring" (brought) here. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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It’s because he was my first pet. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Thank you for having brought joy and happiness to my family, and I’m sorry we couldn't have done better to you, B. Thank you for having brought joy and happiness to my family, and I’m sorry we couldn't have done better This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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My family used to have an adorable, petite terrier with beautiful, silky hair, named ‘B’. My family used to have an adorable, petite terrier with beautiful, silky hair, named This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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