July 24, 2022
True Crime content
This semester I've grown an affinity for True Crime content, gracias a Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, and Bailey Sarian and others on YouTube. I was introduced to a variety of cases across the world. A recent case that had me very curious and intrigued is the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea. The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time is very intriguing. Another case I've been oblivious to until now, was that Hawaii was a kingdom! the Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian on this was shocking to say the least. It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation.
Correction Settings
This semester I've grown an affinity for True Crime content, gracias athanks to Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, and Bailey Sarian and others on YouTube.
This semester I've grown an affinity for True Crime content, thanks to Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, and Bailey Sarian and others on YouTube.
Alt: I've gotten into True Crime, I've become a fan of True Crime
A recent case that had me very curious wand intrigued is the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
A recent case that had me very curious was the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
Removed curious to avoid repeating in the following sentence.
The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time is very intriguing. The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time is very intriguing.
Alt: "Intrigues me" instead of "is very intriguing."
Another case I've been oblivious to until now, was that Hawaii was a kingdom!
Another case I've been oblivious to until now was that Hawaii was a kingdom!
tThe Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian on this was shocking, to say the least.
The Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian on this was shocking, to say the least.
It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation. It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation.
Alt: "culture to more deeply understand and appreciate it."
Sounds more natural, though both are understood!
Feedback
Wonderful job!
True Crime content
True Crime
This semester I've grown an affinity for True Crime content, gracias aotten into watching True Crime, which stars Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, and Bailey Sarian and others on YouTube.
This semester I've gotten into watching True Crime, which stars Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, and Bailey Sarian and others on YouTube.
"This semester I've gotten into watching True Crime" --> This is US slang
I waThe series introduced tos a variety of cases across the world.
The series introduces a variety of cases across the world.
We often use the active voice instead of the passive voice in the US.
A recent case that hadgot me very curious and intrigued is the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
A recent case that got me very curious is the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
This sounds more natural in the US.
The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time is very intriguing.
Another case I've been oblivious to until now, wasFrom a different episode, I learned that Hawaii was a kingdom!
From a different episode, I learned that Hawaii was a kingdom!
tThe Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian on this was shocking to say the least.
The Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian was shocking to say the least.
It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation.
Feedback
Good job!
This semester I've growndeveloped an affinity for True Crime content, gracias athanks to Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, and Bailey Sarian, and others on YouTube.
This semester I've developed an affinity for True Crime content, thanks to Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, Bailey Sarian, and others on YouTube.
I was introduced to a variety of cases acrossfrom around the world.
I was introduced to a variety of cases from around the world.
A recent case that had me very curious and intrigued iwas the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
A recent case that had me very curious and intrigued was the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
alt:
A recent case that has had me very curious and intrigued is the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
Sounds better with correct tense agreement: has...is or had...was
The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time is very intriguing.
Another case (fact, item) to which I've been oblivious to until now, was that Hawaii was once a kingdom!
Another case (fact, item) to which I've been oblivious until now, was that Hawaii was once a kingdom!
tThe Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian on this was shocking to say the least.
The Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian on this was shocking to say the least.
It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation. It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation.
alt:
but to explore their history and culture to gain a deeper understanding and appreciation of it.
This semester I've growndeveloped an affinity for True Crime content, gracias athanks to Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, and Bailey Sarian and some others on YouTubers.
This semester I've developed an affinity for True Crime content, thanks to Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, and Bailey Sarian and some other YouTubers.
I don't think we say "grow an affinity"
gracias is not English
I was introduced to a variety of cases from across the world. I was introduced to a variety of cases from across the world.
A recent case that had me very curious and intrigued iwas the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
A recent case that had me very curious and intrigued was the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time iwas very intriguing.
The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time was very intriguing.
I would use past tense here because it's implied that you learnt about this case in the past and the event of you being intrigued was therefore in the past
Another casefact I've been oblivious to until now, was that Hawaii was a kingdom!
Another fact I've been oblivious to until now, was that Hawaii was a kingdom!
tThe Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian on this was shocking, to say the least.
The Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian on this was shocking, to say the least.
It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore theirits history and culture forand gain a deeper understanding and appreciation for it.
It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore its history and culture and gain a deeper understanding and appreciation for it.
Hawaii is not a person so you use "its"
I modified the syntax at the end to make it sound better
Feedback
Overall, very few and trivial corrections. Good job!
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True Crime content
True Crime |
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This semester I've grown an affinity for True Crime content, gracias a Stephanie Harlowe, Kendall Rae, and Bailey Sarian and others on YouTube.
This semester I've I don't think we say "grow an affinity" gracias is not English
This semester I've
This semester I've g "This semester I've gotten into watching True Crime" --> This is US slang
This semester I've grown an affinity for True Crime content, Alt: I've gotten into True Crime, I've become a fan of True Crime |
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I was introduced to a variety of cases across the world. I was introduced to a variety of cases from across the world. I was introduced to a variety of cases from across the world.
I was introduced to a variety of cases
We often use the active voice instead of the passive voice in the US. |
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A recent case that had me very curious and intrigued is the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea.
A recent case that had me very curious and intrigued
A recent case that had me very curious and intrigued alt: A recent case that has had me very curious and intrigued is the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller after his voyage to New Guinea. Sounds better with correct tense agreement: has...is or had...was
A recent case that This sounds more natural in the US.
A recent case that had me very curious wa Removed curious to avoid repeating in the following sentence. |
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The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time is very intriguing.
The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time I would use past tense here because it's implied that you learnt about this case in the past and the event of you being intrigued was therefore in the past This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time is very intriguing. The mystery surrounding his circumstances and the political climate at the time is very intriguing. Alt: "Intrigues me" instead of "is very intriguing." |
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Another case I've been oblivious to until now, was that Hawaii was a kingdom!
Another
Another case (fact, item) to which I've been oblivious
Another case I've been oblivious to until now |
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the Dark History episode by Bailey Sarian on this was shocking to say the least.
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It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation.
It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore Hawaii is not a person so you use "its" I modified the syntax at the end to make it sound better It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation. It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation. alt: but to explore their history and culture to gain a deeper understanding and appreciation of it. This sentence has been marked as perfect! It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation. It inspired me to visit Hawaii, not for the obvious tourist attractions, but to explore their history and culture for a deeper understanding and appreciation. Alt: "culture to more deeply understand and appreciate it." Sounds more natural, though both are understood! |
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