Xtren070's avatar
Xtren070

Jan. 14, 2024

0
I am practicing for the Ielts task 2

The question of whether or not people should let go traditions for the sake of progress has been the subject of heated public discussion. Traditions, in my opinion, should be maintained regardless of the changes in society.

Firstly, despite the improvements of technology, traditions can coexist with them. For instance, traditional dishes can still be prepared using new utensils and maintain as a part of people's diet. Although it is difficult to keep traditions without any alteration, they can be improved with new innovations. For example, as time goes by, contemporary instruments enrich traditional songs, without replacing completely.

Another point to consider is that traditions are essential in the cultural identity of a society. Each community has specific activities and rituals that distinguish their people and make them feel unique from others. However, there are some practices that can be discriminatory to others and need careful revaluation. For example, in some indigenous communities women are still perceived as inferior and unable to incapable of performing tasks equivalent to men. That type of conception is far from the new values and ideas of a contemporary society, and it should be studied carefully.

In conclusion, traditions can take advantage of new innovation in areas like culinary arts and music. Also, they are a key part of the cultural identity of every society, which help people distinguish from others. Finally, in order to adapt, tradition should be evaluated and align to the new values and ideas of contemporary society.

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Corrections

I am practicing for the Ielts task 2

The question of whether or not people should let go of traditions for the sake of progress has been the subject of heated public discussion.

Traditions, in my opinion, should be maintained regardless of the changes in society.

Firstly, despite traditions can coexist withe improvements ofin technology, traditions and societal chan coexist with themges.

For instance, traditional dishes can still be prepared using new utensils and maintained as a part of people's diet.

Although it is difficult to keep traditions without any alteration, they can be improved with new innovations.

For example, as time goes by, contemporary instruments enrich traditional songs, without replacing them completely.

Another point to consider is that traditions are essential in the cultural identity of people in a society.

Each community has specific activities and rituals that distinguish their people and make them feel unique from others.

However, there are some practices that can be discriminatory to others and need careful re-evaluation.

For example, in some indigenous communities, women are still perceived as inferior and unable to incapable of performing tasks equivalent to men.

That type of conperception is far from the new values and ideas of a contemporary societyies, and it should be studied carefully.

In conclusion, traditions can take advantage of new innovations in areas like culinary arts and music.

Also, they are a key part of the cultural identity of people in every society, which helps people to distinguish themselves from others.

Finally, in order to adapt, tradition should be re-evaluated and aligned to the new values and ideas of contemporary societyies.

Feedback

Very well written!

I am practicing for the Ielts task 2

The question of whether or not people should let go of traditions for the sake of progress has been the subject of heated public discussion.

Traditions, in my opinion, should be maintained regardless of the changes in society.

Firstly, despite the improvements of technology, traditions can coexist with them.

For instance, traditional dishes can still be prepared using new utensils and maintained as a part of people's diet.

Although it is difficult to keep traditions without any alteration, they can be improved with new innovations.

For example, as time goes by, contemporary instruments enrich traditional songs, without replacing them completely.

Another point to consider is that traditions are essential in the cultural identity of a society.

Each community has specific activities and rituals that distinguish their people and make them feel unique from others.

However, there are some practices that can be discriminatory to others and need careful revaluation.

For example, in some indigenous communities women are still perceived as inferior and unable to incapable of performing tasks equivalent to men.

That type ofSuch conception iss are far from the new values and ideas of a contemporary society, and it should be studied carefully.

In conclusion, traditions can take advantage of new innovations in areas like culinary arts and music.

Also, they are a key part of the cultural identity of every society, which help people distinguish from othersthat distinguish every society.

Finally, in order to adapt, tradition should be evaluated and aligned to the new values and ideas of contemporary society.

Feedback

Very well written!

Xtren070's avatar
Xtren070

Jan. 14, 2024

0

Thanks for the corrections!

The question of whether or not people should let go of traditions for the sake of progress has been the subject of heated public discussion.

Traditions, in my opinion, should be maintained regardless of the changes in society.

Changes in general, so omitting “the” is better.

Firstly, desptraditions can coexist witeh the improvements of technology, traditions can coexist with them.

The “despite” doesn’t make sense here because it is not clear why you would expect tradition to be threatened by technology (you would need to say this explicitly).

For instance, traditional dishes can still be prepared using new utensils and maintained as a part of people's diets.

Although it is difficult to keep traditions without any alteration, they can be improved with new innovations.

For example, as time goes by, contemporary instruments enrich traditional songs, without replacing them completely.

Another point to consider is that traditions are essential in the cultural identity of a society.

Each community has specific activities and rituals that distinguish their people from others and make them feel unique from others.

However, there are some practices that can be discriminatory to others and need careful reevaluation.

For example, in some indigenous communities women are still perceived as inferior and unable to incapable of performing tasks equivalent toas capably as men.

That type of conception is far from the new values and ideas of a contemporary society, and it should be studied carefully.

“Studied” is not the best choice of word here. “Reconsidered” would be better, but the connotation is different.

In conclusion, traditions can take advantage of new innovations in areas likesuch as culinary arts and music.

Also, tThey are also a key part of the cultural identity of every society, which helps people distinguish themselves from others.

“Distinguish” requires an object.
Beginning a sentence with “also” is not really appropriate in formal writing.

Finally, in order to adapt, tradition should be evaluated and align towith the new values and ideas of contemporary society.

Xtren070's avatar
Xtren070

Jan. 14, 2024

0

Thanks for the corrections!

The question of whether or not people should let go traditions for the sake of progress has been the subject of heated public discussion.


The question of whether or not people should let go of traditions for the sake of progress has been the subject of heated public discussion.

The question of whether or not people should let go of traditions for the sake of progress has been the subject of heated public discussion.

The question of whether or not people should let go of traditions for the sake of progress has been the subject of heated public discussion.

Traditions, in my opinion, should be maintained regardless of the changes in society.


Traditions, in my opinion, should be maintained regardless of the changes in society.

Changes in general, so omitting “the” is better.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Traditions, in my opinion, should be maintained regardless of the changes in society.

Firstly, despite the improvements of technology, traditions can coexist with them.


Firstly, desptraditions can coexist witeh the improvements of technology, traditions can coexist with them.

The “despite” doesn’t make sense here because it is not clear why you would expect tradition to be threatened by technology (you would need to say this explicitly).

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Firstly, despite traditions can coexist withe improvements ofin technology, traditions and societal chan coexist with themges.

I am practicing for the Ielts task 2


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

For instance, traditional dishes can still be prepared using new utensils and maintain as a part of people's diet.


For instance, traditional dishes can still be prepared using new utensils and maintained as a part of people's diets.

For instance, traditional dishes can still be prepared using new utensils and maintained as a part of people's diet.

For instance, traditional dishes can still be prepared using new utensils and maintained as a part of people's diet.

Although it is difficult to keep traditions without any alteration, they can be improved with new innovations.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

For example, as time goes by, contemporary instruments enrich traditional songs, without replacing completely.


For example, as time goes by, contemporary instruments enrich traditional songs, without replacing them completely.

For example, as time goes by, contemporary instruments enrich traditional songs, without replacing them completely.

For example, as time goes by, contemporary instruments enrich traditional songs, without replacing them completely.

Another point to consider is that traditions are essential in the cultural identity of a society.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Another point to consider is that traditions are essential in the cultural identity of people in a society.

Each community has specific activities and rituals that distinguish their people and make them feel unique from others.


Each community has specific activities and rituals that distinguish their people from others and make them feel unique from others.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Each community has specific activities and rituals that distinguish their people and make them feel unique from others.

However, there are some practices that can be discriminatory to others and need careful revaluation.


However, there are some practices that can be discriminatory to others and need careful reevaluation.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

However, there are some practices that can be discriminatory to others and need careful re-evaluation.

For example, in some indigenous communities women are still perceived as inferior and unable to incapable of performing tasks equivalent to men.


For example, in some indigenous communities women are still perceived as inferior and unable to incapable of performing tasks equivalent toas capably as men.

For example, in some indigenous communities women are still perceived as inferior and unable to incapable of performing tasks equivalent to men.

For example, in some indigenous communities, women are still perceived as inferior and unable to incapable of performing tasks equivalent to men.

That type of conception is far from the new values and ideas of a contemporary society, and it should be studied carefully.


That type of conception is far from the new values and ideas of a contemporary society, and it should be studied carefully.

“Studied” is not the best choice of word here. “Reconsidered” would be better, but the connotation is different.

That type ofSuch conception iss are far from the new values and ideas of a contemporary society, and it should be studied carefully.

That type of conperception is far from the new values and ideas of a contemporary societyies, and it should be studied carefully.

In conclusion, traditions can take advantage of new innovation in areas like culinary arts and music.


In conclusion, traditions can take advantage of new innovations in areas likesuch as culinary arts and music.

In conclusion, traditions can take advantage of new innovations in areas like culinary arts and music.

In conclusion, traditions can take advantage of new innovations in areas like culinary arts and music.

Also, they are a key part of the cultural identity of every society, which help people distinguish from others.


Also, tThey are also a key part of the cultural identity of every society, which helps people distinguish themselves from others.

“Distinguish” requires an object. Beginning a sentence with “also” is not really appropriate in formal writing.

Also, they are a key part of the cultural identity of every society, which help people distinguish from othersthat distinguish every society.

Also, they are a key part of the cultural identity of people in every society, which helps people to distinguish themselves from others.

Finally, in order to adapt, tradition should be evaluated and align to the new values and ideas of contemporary society.


Finally, in order to adapt, tradition should be evaluated and align towith the new values and ideas of contemporary society.

Finally, in order to adapt, tradition should be evaluated and aligned to the new values and ideas of contemporary society.

Finally, in order to adapt, tradition should be re-evaluated and aligned to the new values and ideas of contemporary societyies.

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