My Dormitory Magnifies Suffering

This is a great title haha

However, I feel like it's more grammatical if the title is ethier:
1. My Dormitory Magnifies Suffering
2. Dormitories Magnify Suffering

InDuring this term, I was preparing for a momentous exam, so I enforced myself to sleep as early as possible to develop a testgood habit.

It's more natural to say "during" here when referring to a set time period
Adding a comma before so makes it easier to read (breaking ideas into smaller pieces)
I've never heard of a test habit, but "a good habit" is more common

But this way of sleeping was simple to beeasily interrupted by others because you are not sleepy enough to overcome the noise of others.

Easily sounds more natural than simple in this context

(In fact,I had borntolerated his cough for two terms, but I don't value the sleeping at that time) If that's only the case,then so be it.But he snored for thirty minutes after falling asleep.

I don't understand "born" in this context. I feel like "tolerated" might work better here?

So I must fall asleep within 30 minutes.But you know, if you are full of thirst to the sleeping ,you arethirsty, it is difficult to sleep.s So it's a impossible task to me. In the following days, I often lose sleeping.

I tried to make it a little more concise.

InDuring this term, I was preparing for a momentous exam, so I enforced myself to sleep as early as possible to develop a test habit.

But this way of sleeping was simple to besleep schedule was easily interrupted by others because you are not sleepy enough to overcome the noise of othersthat people make.

One of my roommates had a chronic cough and often coughed at night, especially when I graduallywas about to feall asleep.

(In fact, I had borne his cough for two terms, but I doidn't value the sleeping as much at that time.) If that's only the case, was all, then so be it. But he snored for thirty minutes after falling asleep.

I actually had to search this up:
Born is the past participle of the verb bear only when it's used in the sense of birth. It is also used as an adjective in the same sense. Borne is the past participle of the verb bear in all senses except the one related to birth. It can also be used as an adjective in these senses.

So I must fall asleep within 30 minutes. But you know if you are full of thirst to the sleeping ,you are difficult to sleep.so it's a impossible task to me.the harder you try to sleep, the harder it is. In the following days, I often loset sleeping.

In tThis term, I was preparing for a momentous exam so I enforced myself to sleep as early as possible to develop a test habit.

But this way of sleeping was simple to beeasily interrupted by others because you are not sleepy enough to overcomesleep through the noise of others.

(In fact, I had borntolerated his cough for two terms, but I doidn't value the sleeping at that time). If that'it was only the case,at, then so be it. But he also snored for thirty minutes after falling asleep.

So I musthad to fall asleep within 30 minutes. But you know if you are full of thirst to the sleeping ,you arealready well-slept, it's difficult to fall asleep.s So it' was an impossible task tofor me. In the following days, I often loset sleeping.

Remember to maintain tense - your story is past tense, so you should stay in past tense for the whole story.
Also, English has the phrase "well-slept," meaning you don't need more sleep.

In this term, I was preparing for a momentous exam soWhile preparing for an important exam earlier this term, I enforced myself to sleep as early as possible to develop a testgood habit for exam preparation.

mostly phrasing and word choice: "in this term" sounds awkward. "momentous" is technically correct by definition but we would usually call a big exam "important" instead. also, "enforced" usually refers to enforcing rules or something similar, if it's relating to yourself, you would say "forced". "test habit" also sounds awkward

But this way of sleeping was simplesleeping this early made it easier to be interrupted by others because you are noI wasn't sleepy enough to overcomignore the noise of others.

"way of sleeping" is unclear, not the right use for "simple". interrupted needs to be past tense. usually, if you are writing in the first person (using the pronoun I) you wouldn't switch to the second person midway through (using the pronoun you, directly addressing the reader)

One of my roommates had a chronic cough and often coughed at night especially when Iile I was gradually fealling asleep.

tense change using "while" instead of "when". the use of "when" implies cause and effect: since you were falling asleep, they coughed. "while" implies the two actions were happening at the same time

(In fact, I had borndealt with his cough for two terms, but I don't value theit's difficult to sleeping at that time.) If that's the only the case,way, then so be it. But he snoreds for thirty minutes after falling asleep, so I have to fall asleep within 30 minutes.

"born" doesn't make sense here, the last sentence beginning with "but" is technically a fragment, not a complete sentence, which means it needs to be combined with the next sentence fragment below.

So I must fall asleep within 30 minutes.But you know if you are full of thirst to the sleeping ,you aBut if I am trying hard to sleep, it becomes more difficult to sleep.s. So it's an impossible task tofor me. In the following days, I often lose sleeping.

"full of thirst to the sleeping" doesn't make sense in English, again stay in first person (using pronoun I)

In tThis term, I was preparing for a momentous exam, so I enforced myself to go to sleep as early as possible to develop a test habihabit to help with my test.

technically "in this term" isn't wrong, it just sounds a little unnatural - i only changed it because there were some other mistakes in this sentence
enforce is more used for making sure that a rule is followed by other people. if you're talking about trying to make your body fall asleep, you say forced.
"a test habit" doesn't really make sense on its own, it's easier to say "to improve my test-taking" or "to develop the habit" - my correction is kinda long-winded, but it's the best way in my opinion to rephrase "a test habit"

But this way of sleeping was simpleGoing to bed so early meant that it was easy to be interrupted by others, because you are not sleepy enough to overcome the noise of others.

"way of sleeping" makes it sound like you tried a new bed or position to sleep in, when really you just changed the time of day. you could say this a million different ways, i just gave one.
also, we would say "easy" here instead of "simple" - not sure why, it just sounds wrong.

One of my roommates had a chronic cough and often coughed at night, especially when I graduallywas trying to feall asleep.

just nitpicking grammar + trying to make this sound more natural

(In fact, I had bornendured his cough for two terms, but I doidn't value the sleeping at that time.) If that's only the cas was the only issue, then so be it. But he snored for thirty minutes after falling asleep.

i think instead of born you meant to say "bore with" (like "bear with" but in the past tense) - it's not wrong to use this phrase, it's just very uncommon in my opinion. i actually had to google what the correct past tense of "bear with" was, and then i realised that if i had to look it up, it's probably best to just pick a different word lol

similarly, i only ever really hear "if that's the case" - we don't add other words like "only" in it. it's also usually used for talking about like someone's motivation for doing something, or the circumstances in which something happened. here you're more so introducing a new issue, so i don't think "if that's the case" is the best phrase to use

So I must fall asleep within 30 minutes. But you know, if you are full of thirst to the sleeping ,you areally need to sleep, it's difficult to fall asleep.s So it's an impossible task to me. In the following days, I often loset sleeping.

"full of thirst to do ___" isn't a phrase that exists in english
before a word that begins with a vowel sound, a -> an

InDuring this term, I was preparing for a momentous exam, so I enforced myself to sleep as early as possible to develop a test habit.

But this way of sleeping was simple to beeasily interrupt by others because you areI was not sleepy enough to overcome the noise of others.

This story is about you, so always refer to your condition and not a general condition.

One of my roommates had a chronic cough and often coughed at night, especially when I gradually fell asleep.

Just a missing comma

(In fact, I had borndealt with his cough for two terms, but I doidn't value the sleeping at that time) If that's only the case, then so be it. aBut he snored for thirty minutes after falling asleep.

So, I must fall asleep within 30 minutes. But you know, if you are full of thirst to the sleeping ,you aally want to sleep, then it's even more difficult to fall asleep., so it's an impossible task tofor me. In the following days, I often lose sleeping.

The second sentence was very confusing, so I wrote it out to make more logical sense.