kie's avatar
kie

Oct. 24, 2024

0
Common memorial place for citizen revolution

I have visited Place de la Bastille in Paris. It has attracted me when I knew it in the World History class I took at high school.

There had been a famous prison in Place de la Bastille until French Revolution started in 1789. But then, citizens were increasingly discontent with the Ancien Regime ,and eventually destroyed the prison and released prisoners. Bastille is the place where the revolution started.

So, now it seems the victorious symbol of French citizen revolution.

There is nothing like prison there. Only a pillar which names of martyr in the revolution are engraved on is standing alone. I heard marches are occasionally held there though there was no marche when I visited the place.

It was the best place to realize the great history and passage of time.

Corrections

CA common memorial place for the citizens involved in the French revolution

I have visited Place de la Bastille in Paris.

It has attracted me when I knewy attention when I first learned about it in the World History class I took atin high school.

There had been a famous prison in Place de la Bastille until the French Revolution started in  1789.

Buty then, citizens were increasingly discontent with the Ancient Regime , and eventually destroyed the prison and released the prisoners.

Bastille is the place where the revolution started.

So, now it seems the victorious symbol of French citizeno be the symbol of the victorious citizens in the French revolution.

ThereIt is nothing like a prison there.

Only a pillar on which the names of martyr ins of the revolution are engraved on is standing alonestands.

I heard marches are occasionally held there, though there was no marche when I visited the place.

It was the best place to realize the great history and passage of time.

Common memorial place for citizens for revolutions

I haveOnce, I visited the Place de la Bastille in Paris.

It has attracted me when I knewinterested me ever since I learned about it in the World History class I took atin high school.

There had beenwas a famous prison in the Place de la Bastille until the French Revolution started in  1789.

Buty then, citizens were increasingly discontent with the Ancien Rregime , and eventuallduring the uprising, they destroyed the prison and released prisoners.

The Bastille is the place where the revolution started.

So, now it seemshas become the victorious symbol of the French citizen rRevolution.

We call it the 'French Revolution' in English, which is a proper noun.

There is nothing like that prison there.

'there is nothing like prison' would refer to the general idea of prisons, instead of a specific prison like you're talking about.

Only a pillar on which the names of martyrs in the revolution are engraved on is standing alone.

I heard marches are occasionally held there, though there wasere no marches when I visited the place.

It was the best place to realize theflect on great history and the passage of time.

Feedback

Great job! Make sure to include 'the' when you're using proper nouns.

I have visited Place de la Bastille in Paris when I went on holiday to France.

Saying "I have visited" without specifying *when* doesn't feel natural.

For example, you could write:

◾️ "A few years ago, I visited Place de la Bastille in Paris"

◾️ "I visited Place de la Bastille in Paris in 2022."

Or, you can add some context like this:

◾️ "I visited Place de la Bastille in Paris whilst I was travelling Europe"

It has attracted lways been some whenre I knew it in the World Hwanted to go, ever since I learned about it during a history class I took at high school.

There had been a famous prison in Place de la Bastille until the French Revolution started in  1789.

BuAt that timen, citizens were growing/becoming increasingly discontent with the Ancien Regime , and eventually destroyed the prison and released the prisoners.

Bastille is the place where the revolution started.

So, nNow it seemrves as the victorious symbol of the French citizen rRevolution.

There is nothing like a prison there nowadays.

Only a pillar, upon which the names of martyrs in the revolution are engraved on is, standings alone.

A more natural pattern for this sentence might:

"There's is only a single pillar left standing, upon which the names of martyrs in the revolution are engraved".

I heard marches are occasionally held there though there was no marche (taking place) when I visited the place.

It was the best place to realize the greatexperience history and the passage of time.

Feedback

Super post, very well done.

kie's avatar
kie

Oct. 26, 2024

0

Thank you for your kind teaching!!
I was able to realize the reasons for mistakes.

I have visited Place de la Bastille in Paris.


I haveOnce, I visited the Place de la Bastille in Paris.

I have visited Place de la Bastille in Paris when I went on holiday to France.

Saying "I have visited" without specifying *when* doesn't feel natural. For example, you could write: ◾️ "A few years ago, I visited Place de la Bastille in Paris" ◾️ "I visited Place de la Bastille in Paris in 2022." Or, you can add some context like this: ◾️ "I visited Place de la Bastille in Paris whilst I was travelling Europe"

I have visited Place de la Bastille in Paris.

Only a pillar which names of martyr in the revolution are engraved on is standing alone.


Only a pillar on which the names of martyrs in the revolution are engraved on is standing alone.

Only a pillar, upon which the names of martyrs in the revolution are engraved on is, standings alone.

A more natural pattern for this sentence might: "There's is only a single pillar left standing, upon which the names of martyrs in the revolution are engraved".

Only a pillar on which the names of martyr ins of the revolution are engraved on is standing alonestands.

I heard marches are occasionally held there though there was no marche when I visited the place.


I heard marches are occasionally held there, though there wasere no marches when I visited the place.

I heard marches are occasionally held there though there was no marche (taking place) when I visited the place.

I heard marches are occasionally held there, though there was no marche when I visited the place.

Common memorial place for citizen revolution


Common memorial place for citizens for revolutions

CA common memorial place for the citizens involved in the French revolution

It has attracted me when I knew it in the World History class I took at high school.


It has attracted me when I knewinterested me ever since I learned about it in the World History class I took atin high school.

It has attracted lways been some whenre I knew it in the World Hwanted to go, ever since I learned about it during a history class I took at high school.

It has attracted me when I knewy attention when I first learned about it in the World History class I took atin high school.

There had been a famous prison in Place de la Bastille until French Revolution started in 1789.


There had beenwas a famous prison in the Place de la Bastille until the French Revolution started in  1789.

There had been a famous prison in Place de la Bastille until the French Revolution started in  1789.

There had been a famous prison in Place de la Bastille until the French Revolution started in  1789.

But then, citizens were increasingly discontent with the Ancien Regime ,and eventually destroyed the prison and released prisoners.


Buty then, citizens were increasingly discontent with the Ancien Rregime , and eventuallduring the uprising, they destroyed the prison and released prisoners.

BuAt that timen, citizens were growing/becoming increasingly discontent with the Ancien Regime , and eventually destroyed the prison and released the prisoners.

Buty then, citizens were increasingly discontent with the Ancient Regime , and eventually destroyed the prison and released the prisoners.

So, now it seems the victorious symbol of French citizen revolution.


So, now it seemshas become the victorious symbol of the French citizen rRevolution.

We call it the 'French Revolution' in English, which is a proper noun.

So, nNow it seemrves as the victorious symbol of the French citizen rRevolution.

So, now it seems the victorious symbol of French citizeno be the symbol of the victorious citizens in the French revolution.

There is nothing like prison there.


There is nothing like that prison there.

'there is nothing like prison' would refer to the general idea of prisons, instead of a specific prison like you're talking about.

There is nothing like a prison there nowadays.

ThereIt is nothing like a prison there.

It was the best place to realize the great history and passage of time.


It was the best place to realize theflect on great history and the passage of time.

It was the best place to realize the greatexperience history and the passage of time.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Common memorial pillar for citizen revolution


Bastille is the place where the revolution started.


The Bastille is the place where the revolution started.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

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