Scarlett_Father's avatar
Scarlett_Father

Nov. 22, 2023

1
Changes in the last Decade

In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induced by Covid-19. The most featured changes should be the disappearance of in-city villages.

High-rise buildings expanded and flat roads leveled in the downtown area, dilapidated mansions are missing. More and more people flock to this city from different locations, and two elementary schools nearby attempted to accommodate the increasing population and enlarge their capacity by around 50%. Nevertheless, some children's parents even have to seek their personal relations or pay extra money for school admission.

Corrections

Changes in the lLast Decade

In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induccaused by Covid-19.

The most featurednotable changes shouldhave been the disappearance of in-city villages.

High-rise buildings expanded, and flat roads were leveled in the downtown area, d. Dilapidated mansions are missingapartments are gone.

More and more people flock to this city from different locations, and two elementary schools nearby attempted to accommodate the increasing population andby enlargeing their capacity by around 50%.

Nevertheless, some children's parents even have to useek their personal relaconnections or pay extra moneybribes for school admission.

Scarlett_Father's avatar
Scarlett_Father

Nov. 24, 2023

1

Thank you for your corrections!

Changes in the last Decade

Changes in the Last Decade

In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induced by Covid-19.

In the last decade, my city/area has experienced significant development in addition to changes caused by Covid-19.

The most featured changes should be the disappearance of in-city villages.

The most prominent change is/might be the disappearance of in-city villages.

High-rise buildings expanded and flat roads leveled in the downtown area, dilapidated mansions are missing.

The city is demolishing dilapidated homes downtown to make way for new high-rise buildings and freshly paved roads.
*Mansions refers to really fancy homes inhabited by the rich; if this is what you meant then you can keep it!

More and more people flock to this city from different locations, and two elementary schools nearby attempted to accommodate the increasing population and enlarge their capacity by around 50%.

Each year, more and more people flock to this city from all over; two elementary schools nearby have tried to accommodate for the growing population by increasing their capacity by around 50%.

Nevertheless, some children's parents even have to seek their personal relations or pay extra money for school admission.

However, the schools are still so competitive that some parents must have personal connections or pay extra dues in order to secure their child's admission.

rabbit_1999's avatar
rabbit_1999

Nov. 23, 2023

0

People can use (personal) connections to get a job in the workplace or admission to a school. Connections refer to people you know that can connect you to an organization or institution; they have the power to help you get what you want.
Personal relations simply refers to relationships between people, especially those between friends, lovers, and family members.

Scarlett_Father's avatar
Scarlett_Father

Nov. 24, 2023

1

Thank you for your corrections! I used the word "Mansion" wrong here, I thought It was a synonym of "district". :-)

Changes in the last Decade

In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induccaused by Covid-19.

I assume “areas” (plural) is a mistake, as it sounds like you have two or more homes in two or more areas.

The most featuredprominent changes should bare the disappearance of in-city villageneighborhoods.

The most prominent changes are the disappearance of city neighborhoods.

“In-city villages” doesn’t make sense to me. A “village” is almost always in the countryside in US English.

High-rise buildings have been expanded and flat roads leveled in the downtown area, and dilapidated [mansions] are missing.

In the US, a “mansion” is a huge home for one very rich family. Is this what you mean?

More and more people have flocked to this city from different locationplaces, and two elementary schools [nearby] have attempted to accommodate the increasing population andby enlargeing their capacity by around 50%.

“Nearby” seems strange—it seems to mean “near this city,” which implies the schools aren’t actually in the city. If you mean “near my home,” you’ll need to make this more clear.

Your original wording implies the schools only tried to enlarge their capacity (but didn’t succeed).

Nevertheless, some (children's) parents even have to useek (their) personal relaconnections or pay extra money fobribes to secure their schoolildren’s admission.

I’m guessing this is what you mean, but I’m not certain:
Nevertheless, some parents even have to use personal connections or pay bribes to secure their children’s admission.

Feedback

The corrections by splinterofchaos are good, too.

Scarlett_Father's avatar
Scarlett_Father

Nov. 24, 2023

1

Thank you so much! This writing is simple, but I really did make some mistakes that could be misunderstood. 'Nearby' and 'mansion' aren't needed here.

JoeTofu's avatar
JoeTofu

Nov. 24, 2023

0

You’re welcome 👍

In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induced bydue to Covid-19.

"Induced" might not be technically wrong here, but it's not a commonly used word.

The most featured changes should be the disappearance of in-city villages.

featured: I'm taking a guess here, but I think you meant "featured" as in "made clearly visible; especially noticeable; common or ubiquitous" however, it more reads like "the changes that have been featured (by someone)." I want to say "prominent" should be here instead, but "should be the..." is also a bit hard to parse. The literal meaning of this sentence is that "inner-city villages should be done with (they are a health hazard), but they aren't (for some reason)" but the wording should be different in that case.

"Ideally, one of those changes should have been getting rid of inner-city villages."

High-rise buildings were expanded and flat roads leveledwere laid down in the downtown area, dilapidated mansions awere missingtorn down.

I changed the sentence to a passive voice because it felt better to me. A road can't lay itself and mansions can't tear themselves down.

More and more people flock to this city from different locations, and tplaces. Two elementary schools nearby attempted to accommodate the increasing population andby enlargeing their capacity by around 50%.

Nevertheless, some children's parents even have to seek their personal relations or pay extra money for school admission.

I don't know what "seek their personal relations" means, sorry.

Scarlett_Father's avatar
Scarlett_Father

Nov. 22, 2023

1

Thank you for your corrections! "personal relations" is Chinglish I think, regarding seeking friends' help.

rabbit_1999's avatar
rabbit_1999

Nov. 23, 2023

0

People can use (personal) connections to get a job in the workplace or admission to a school. Connections refer to people you know that can connect you to an organization or institution; they have the power to help you get what you want.
Personal relations simply refers to relationships between people, especially those between friends, lovers, and family members.

Changes in the last Decade


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Changes in the last Decade

Changes in the Last Decade

Changes in the lLast Decade

In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induced by Covid-19.


In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induced bydue to Covid-19.

"Induced" might not be technically wrong here, but it's not a commonly used word.

In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induccaused by Covid-19.

I assume “areas” (plural) is a mistake, as it sounds like you have two or more homes in two or more areas.

In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induced by Covid-19.

In the last decade, my city/area has experienced significant development in addition to changes caused by Covid-19.

In the last decade, there have been many changes in my living areas, besides those induccaused by Covid-19.

The most featured changes should be the disappearance of in-city villages.


The most featured changes should be the disappearance of in-city villages.

featured: I'm taking a guess here, but I think you meant "featured" as in "made clearly visible; especially noticeable; common or ubiquitous" however, it more reads like "the changes that have been featured (by someone)." I want to say "prominent" should be here instead, but "should be the..." is also a bit hard to parse. The literal meaning of this sentence is that "inner-city villages should be done with (they are a health hazard), but they aren't (for some reason)" but the wording should be different in that case. "Ideally, one of those changes should have been getting rid of inner-city villages."

The most featuredprominent changes should bare the disappearance of in-city villageneighborhoods.

The most prominent changes are the disappearance of city neighborhoods. “In-city villages” doesn’t make sense to me. A “village” is almost always in the countryside in US English.

The most featured changes should be the disappearance of in-city villages.

The most prominent change is/might be the disappearance of in-city villages.

The most featurednotable changes shouldhave been the disappearance of in-city villages.

High-rise buildings expanded and flat roads leveled in the downtown area, dilapidated mansions are missing.


High-rise buildings were expanded and flat roads leveledwere laid down in the downtown area, dilapidated mansions awere missingtorn down.

I changed the sentence to a passive voice because it felt better to me. A road can't lay itself and mansions can't tear themselves down.

High-rise buildings have been expanded and flat roads leveled in the downtown area, and dilapidated [mansions] are missing.

In the US, a “mansion” is a huge home for one very rich family. Is this what you mean?

High-rise buildings expanded and flat roads leveled in the downtown area, dilapidated mansions are missing.

The city is demolishing dilapidated homes downtown to make way for new high-rise buildings and freshly paved roads. *Mansions refers to really fancy homes inhabited by the rich; if this is what you meant then you can keep it!

High-rise buildings expanded, and flat roads were leveled in the downtown area, d. Dilapidated mansions are missingapartments are gone.

More and more people flock to this city from different locations, and two elementary schools nearby attempted to accommodate the increasing population and enlarge their capacity by around 50%.


More and more people flock to this city from different locations, and tplaces. Two elementary schools nearby attempted to accommodate the increasing population andby enlargeing their capacity by around 50%.

More and more people have flocked to this city from different locationplaces, and two elementary schools [nearby] have attempted to accommodate the increasing population andby enlargeing their capacity by around 50%.

“Nearby” seems strange—it seems to mean “near this city,” which implies the schools aren’t actually in the city. If you mean “near my home,” you’ll need to make this more clear. Your original wording implies the schools only tried to enlarge their capacity (but didn’t succeed).

More and more people flock to this city from different locations, and two elementary schools nearby attempted to accommodate the increasing population and enlarge their capacity by around 50%.

Each year, more and more people flock to this city from all over; two elementary schools nearby have tried to accommodate for the growing population by increasing their capacity by around 50%.

More and more people flock to this city from different locations, and two elementary schools nearby attempted to accommodate the increasing population andby enlargeing their capacity by around 50%.

Nevertheless, some children's parents even have to seek their personal relations or pay extra money for school admission.


Nevertheless, some children's parents even have to seek their personal relations or pay extra money for school admission.

I don't know what "seek their personal relations" means, sorry.

Nevertheless, some (children's) parents even have to useek (their) personal relaconnections or pay extra money fobribes to secure their schoolildren’s admission.

I’m guessing this is what you mean, but I’m not certain: Nevertheless, some parents even have to use personal connections or pay bribes to secure their children’s admission.

Nevertheless, some children's parents even have to seek their personal relations or pay extra money for school admission.

However, the schools are still so competitive that some parents must have personal connections or pay extra dues in order to secure their child's admission.

Nevertheless, some children's parents even have to useek their personal relaconnections or pay extra moneybribes for school admission.

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