anton_rich's avatar
anton_rich

April 14, 2020

0
An email to a customer.

Task: You are Pete Norman, the Manager of Safety World. The company makes and sells safety equipment for oil rigs. You receive an email from Ben Brenner, Safety Officer on Nord Oil Platform. Ben asks if you have any new safety equipment for emergency escapes from oil platform. Reply to Ben.

Ben, good evening. Thank you for your email.

With regard to your earlier email, I would like to confirm that we indeed have the new emergency escape equipment.

As you aware, Safety World is Europe's largest manufacturer of oil safety equipment. I would also like to inform you that Safety World won the International Safety Award last year.

I would appreciate if you could at your earliest convenience let me know what specific equipment you need.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if you have any questions.

Best wishes.

Peter Norman, the manager of Safety World.

Corrections

Ben, good evening.Dear Ben,

In formal emails, I would opt for a more formal way of addressing the receiving person in your email.

Tthank you for your email.

It is not necessary to start this line with a capital letter.

With regard to your earlier email, I would like tocan confirm that we indeed have the new emergency escape equipment.

According to the prompt, Ben did not ask for specific equipment. Therefore, I would leave out the article since you are informing Ben about emergency escape equipment in general.

I would appreciate it if you could let me know at your earliest convenience let me know what specific equipment you need.

Please don' not hesitate to contact me if you have any questions.

In formal writing, it is better not to use contractions.

anton_rich's avatar
anton_rich

April 15, 2020

0

Leon thank you for feedback and corrections!

An email to a customer.

Task: You are Pete Norman, the Manager of Safety World.

The company makes and sells safety equipment for oil rigs.

Ben asks if you have any new safety equipment for emergency escapes from the oil platform.

Could also be "from an oil platform", but there needs to be an article. It's weird that your prompt has an error like this.

Reply to Ben.

Ben, good evening.

Thank you for your email.

With regard to your earlier email, I would like tocan confirm that we indeed have the new emergency escape equipment.

What you originally wrote isn't wrong, but it's a bit ambiguous as to whether you are giving or receiving the equipment.

As you are aware, Safety World is Europe's largest manufacturer of oil safety equipment.

I would also like to inform you thatn fact, Safety World won the International Safety Award last year.

This sentence is closely related to the previous one. "I would also like to..." makes it sound like you're moving on to a new topic, while "In fact, ..." makes it clear that you're still on the same topic.

I would appreciate if you could at your earliest convenience let me know what specific equipment you need at your earliest convenience.

Your version isn't wrong, but this order is more common.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if you have any questions.

Best wishes.,

Peter Norman, the manager of Safety World.

You don't usually use articles for titles in email signatures.

Feedback

This is very good! Apart from the missing "are" in "As you are aware", this would be fine without any changes. I hope my other corrections are helpful.

anton_rich's avatar
anton_rich

April 15, 2020

0

Bebr117 Thank you for your corrections and feedback. Have a great life : )

An email to a customer.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Task: You are Pete Norman, the Manager of Safety World.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

The company makes and sells safety equipment for oil rigs.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

You receive an email from Ben Brenner, Safety Officer on Nord Oil Platform.


Ben asks if you have any new safety equipment for emergency escapes from oil platform.


Ben asks if you have any new safety equipment for emergency escapes from the oil platform.

Could also be "from an oil platform", but there needs to be an article. It's weird that your prompt has an error like this.

Reply to Ben.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Ben, good evening.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Ben, good evening.Dear Ben,

In formal emails, I would opt for a more formal way of addressing the receiving person in your email.

Thank you for your email.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Tthank you for your email.

It is not necessary to start this line with a capital letter.

With regard to your earlier email, I would like to confirm that we indeed have the new emergency escape equipment.


With regard to your earlier email, I would like tocan confirm that we indeed have the new emergency escape equipment.

What you originally wrote isn't wrong, but it's a bit ambiguous as to whether you are giving or receiving the equipment.

With regard to your earlier email, I would like tocan confirm that we indeed have the new emergency escape equipment.

According to the prompt, Ben did not ask for specific equipment. Therefore, I would leave out the article since you are informing Ben about emergency escape equipment in general.

As you aware, Safety World is Europe's largest manufacturer of oil safety equipment.


As you are aware, Safety World is Europe's largest manufacturer of oil safety equipment.

I would also like to inform you that Safety World won the International Safety Award last year.


I would also like to inform you thatn fact, Safety World won the International Safety Award last year.

This sentence is closely related to the previous one. "I would also like to..." makes it sound like you're moving on to a new topic, while "In fact, ..." makes it clear that you're still on the same topic.

I would appreciate if you could at your earliest convenience let me know what specific equipment you need.


I would appreciate if you could at your earliest convenience let me know what specific equipment you need at your earliest convenience.

Your version isn't wrong, but this order is more common.

I would appreciate it if you could let me know at your earliest convenience let me know what specific equipment you need.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if you have any questions.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Please don' not hesitate to contact me if you have any questions.

In formal writing, it is better not to use contractions.

Best wishes.


Best wishes.,

Peter Norman, the manager of Safety World.


Peter Norman, the manager of Safety World.

You don't usually use articles for titles in email signatures.

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