Nov. 5, 2023
Acupuncture
Acupuncture is a traditional Chinese treatment used to cure certain diseases, about which I don't have much knowledge. In the past two weeks, I stayed in a local traditional Chinese hospital with my father-in-law, who is 80, because he suddenly lost ability to walk as one of his legs could't support him.
In 2018, he had the same problem. We were scared and sent him to this hospital. The doctors gave him some acupuncture treatment; he got 30 minutes of treatment per day for a week, then he could walk and be happy. This time, however, this treatment was not effective, even though two weeks passed. Therefore, we sent him to another well-known hospital. The doctor suggests he have surgery, and a full check-up is needed before it. After ruminating for a few days, we decided to try this surgery.
Acupuncture is highly debated among different people. I personally don't like or believe it. I am a bit scared to put some steel needles into my skin and doubt that this kind of treatment lacks any strong evidence. I think all the effects can be considered due to the human immune system. On the other hand, many people, including most of my family members, they believe in acupuncture and view it as a magic part of traditional Chinese medicine.
The attached picture was of a patient who was getting acupuncture in the hospital. He got a stroke and walked unbalanced.
Acupuncture
Acupuncture, about which I don't have much knowledge, is a traditional Chinese treatment used to cure certain diseases, about which I don't have much knowledge.
Your sentence is correct, but it's technically unclear whether you don't have knowledge about acupuncture or the diseases it cures. The way you currently have it phrased implies you don't know about the diseases, but the context of your writing implies it's acupuncture that you don't know about. So, maybe you could reword like this.
In the past two weeks, I stayed in a local traditional Chinese hospital with my father-in-law, who is 80, because he suddenly lost his/the ability to walk as one of his legs could't support him.
In 2018, he had the same problem.
We were scared and sent him to this hospital.
The doctors gave him some acupuncture treatments; he got 30 minutes of treatment per day for a week, then he could walk and be happy.
This time, however, this treatment was not effective, even though two weeks passed.
Therefore, we sent him to another well-known hospital.
The doctor suggestsed he have surgery, and a full check-up is needed before it.
After ruminating for a few days, we decided to try this surgery.
Acupuncture is highly debated among different people.
I personally don't like or believe in it.
I am a bit scared to put some steel needles into my skin and doubt that this kind of treatment lackhas any strong evidence.
I think all the effects can be considered due to the human immune system.
On the other hand, many people, including most of my family members, they believe in acupuncture and view it as a magic part of traditional Chinese medicine.
The attached picture was of a patient who was getting acupuncture in the hospital.
He got a stroke and walkeds walking unbalanced.
Feedback
Well done!
Some insurance companies in America will cover acupuncture treatments, but it's not very common. I personally have never received an acupuncture treatment, but it's an interesting part of culture!
Nov. 6, 2023
Thank you very much for your corrections and comments! :-)
Acupuncture
Acupuncture is a traditional Chinese treatment used to cure certain diseases, about which I don't have much knowledge.
In the past two weeks, I stayed in a local traditional Chinese hospital with my father-in-law, who is 80, because he suddenly lost the ability to walk as one of his legs could't no longer support him.
In 2018, he had the same problem.
We were scared and sent him to this hospital.
The doctors gave him some acupuncture treatment; he got 30 minutes of treatment per day for a week, then he could walk and be happy.
This time, however, this treatment was not effective, even though two weeks passed.
Therefore, we sent him to another well-known hospital.
The doctor suggests he have surgery, and a full check-up is needed before itin advance.
After ruminating for a few days, we decided to try this surgery.
Acupuncture is highly debated among different people.
I personally don't like it or believe it effective.
I am a bit scared to put some steel needles into my skin and doubt that this kind of treatment lackhas any strong evidence to support it.
I think all the effects can be considered due to the human immune system.
On the other hand, many people, including most of my family members, they believe in acupuncture and view it as a magic part of traditional Chinese medicine.
The attached picture was of a patient who was getting acupuncture in the hospital.
He gotsuffered a stroke and walked unlost his ability to walk in a balanced way.
Nov. 6, 2023
Thank you very much for your corrections! :-)
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Acupuncture This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Acupuncture is a traditional Chinese treatment used to cure certain diseases, about which I don't have much knowledge. This sentence has been marked as perfect! Acupuncture, about which I don't have much knowledge, is a traditional Chinese treatment used to cure certain diseases Your sentence is correct, but it's technically unclear whether you don't have knowledge about acupuncture or the diseases it cures. The way you currently have it phrased implies you don't know about the diseases, but the context of your writing implies it's acupuncture that you don't know about. So, maybe you could reword like this. |
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In the past two weeks, I stayed in a local traditional Chinese hospital with my father-in-law, who is 80, because he suddenly lost ability to walk as one of his legs could't support him. In the past two weeks, I stayed in a local traditional Chinese hospital with my father-in-law, who is 80, because he suddenly lost the ability to walk as one of his legs could In the past two weeks, I stayed in a local traditional Chinese hospital with my father-in-law, who is 80, because he suddenly lost his/the ability to walk as one of his legs could't support him. |
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In 2018, he had the same problem. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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We were scared and sent him to this hospital. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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The doctors gave him some acupuncture treatment; he got 30 minutes of treatment per day for a week, then he could walk and be happy. This sentence has been marked as perfect! The doctors gave him some acupuncture treatments; he got 30 minutes of treatment per day for a week, then he could walk and be happy. |
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This time, however, this treatment was not effective, even though two weeks passed. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Therefore, we sent him to another well-known hospital. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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The doctor suggests he have surgery, and a full check-up is needed before it. The doctor suggests he have surgery, and a full check-up is needed The doctor suggest |
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After ruminating for a few days, we decided to try this surgery. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Acupuncture is highly debated among different people. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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I personally don't like or believe it. I personally don't like it or believe it effective. I personally don't like or believe in it. |
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I am a bit scared to put some steel needles into my skin and doubt that this kind of treatment lacks any strong evidence. I am a bit scared to put some steel needles into my skin and doubt that this kind of treatment I am a bit scared to put some steel needles into my skin and doubt that this kind of treatment |
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I think all the effects can be considered due to the human immune system. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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On the other hand, many people, including most of my family members, they believe in acupuncture and view it as a magic part of traditional Chinese medicine. On the other hand, many people, including most of my family members, On the other hand, many people, including most of my family members, |
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The attached picture was of a patient who was getting acupuncture in the hospital. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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He got a stroke and walked unbalanced. He He got a stroke and wa |
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