haz's avatar
haz

Jan. 18, 2020

0
About my dream

Hello everyone!
I'm Haz.
I havn't been to post for a long time.
I'll post about I want to do. And I made a my list about it.

・I want to go to overseas.(Canada,Philippines,USA,Korea)
・I want to buy a DIANA's Hi heel shoes.
・I want to know about many overseas culture.
・I want to be can speak and listen english.

Do you think about these???
And Do you want to do something??

I'm waiting for your correct and help.
Please comments in here.

Thank you for reading my post.
-Haz


みなさん、こんにちは!
私は、はづです。
長い間、投稿をしていなかったので久しぶりに投稿をします。
やりたいことについて投稿をします。
私はやりたいことリストを作りました。

•海外に行きたい(カナダ、フィリピン、アメリカ、韓国)
•ダイアナの靴が欲しい
•たくさんの海外カルチャーを知りたい
•英語の聞き取りと会話をできるようになりたい

これを読んであなたはどう思いますか?
あなたには、したいことがありますか?

あなたのコメントと添削を待っています。
ここにコメントをしてください。
読んでくれてありがとうございます。
-Haz

Corrections

And I made a my list about it.

You can combine the two above sentences to say "I'll post a list of the things I want to do"

・I want to knowlearn about many overseasforeign cultures.

In this context "learn" is better because its a process. "Many overseas" is fine, but "foreign" is more concise and natural.

And Do you want to do something?

Please comments in here.

Feedback

Just a couple of corrections and another opinion. I hope you get your list done!

haz's avatar
haz

Jan. 18, 2020

0

Thank you. ありがとうございます。

About my dream

Hello everyone!

I'm Haz.

I haven't been able to post for a long time.

So, if you want to say that you haven't posted, as a blunt statement, "I haven't posted in a long time" works best.

If you want to communicate that you've been wanting to post, but couldn't for any number of reasons, "I haven't been able to post in a long time." is more natural.

I'll post about what I want to do.

Grammatically, this sentence is correct. However, it's not the most natural sounding. It would be more common to say, "I'm going to post what I want to do."

And I made a my list about it.So I made a list. ¶

You don't need to say, "about it" because it's already clear from everything else you've said, what you're talking about. ¶

Grammatically speaking, "and" is used to show in addition to. Whereas "so" is used colloquially as an explanation. For example:¶

"I'm going shopping. And I'm going out to dinner." This tells us, you're doing both things!¶

"I'm going shopping. So, I'm going out to dinner." The implication here is that going out to dinner will be more convenient because you're out shopping. ¶

So, in this paragraph "so" works better because you're explaining why/what the list is instead of adding a list on to something else.

・I want to go to overseas.

(Canada,Philippines,USA,Korea)

・I want to know about many cultures over seas culture.

Personally, I think overseas as a term is better than "foreign" however, that might be a personal/regional thing.

・I want to be can speak and listen english.
I want to be fluent in english. ¶

It's more natural, and comprehensive to say you want to be fluent. Fluent/fluency is the ability to read/write/speak/listen in a language. For example:

1) You are fluent in your first language, and would like to be fluent in multiple.

2) I am working on my fluency in english.

And Do you want to do something?
What would you like to do?

"Do you want to do something?" is correct, however, "what would you like to do?" is more natural.

Thank you for reading my post.

-Haz

Feedback

You're doing fantastic! I could completely understabd what you were saying! I hope you get to travel all the places you would like 😊

haz's avatar
haz

Jan. 19, 2020

0

Thank you for your fix.
ありがとうございます。説明がとても分かりやすかったです!

About my dream

Hello everyone!

I'm Haz.

I haven't been to post forposted in a long time.

I think what you want to say is that you haven't been here to post in a long time, but I think this way the sentence says the same thing but flows a bit better.

I'll post about I want to do.

・I want to go to overseas.

・I want to buy a DIANA's Hi high-heel shoes.

・I want to know about many overseas cultures.

・I want to be canable to speak and listen eunderstand English.

The idiom for having the ability to speak a language is either "I can speak English" or for example "I am able to speak English". Both are perfectly fine. However, in this context, with a wish or want to do something, I think you need to use 'to be able to'.
Also, I think 'understand' makes more sense here because while you can always listen to another language, understanding it is a something different.

DWhat do you think about these things?

?

?

And Do you want to do something?

?

I'm waiting for your corrections and help.

Please comments in here.

if you want to use "comment" as a verb you write it like this, but if you want to use it as a noun you could write 'Please put your comments in here.'

Thank you for reading my post.

-Haz

Feedback

I like your list, I also want to go overseas, to Japan sometime. I hope these corrections helped you get closer to your goal of speaking English. Good luck with your studying!

haz's avatar
haz

Jan. 18, 2020

0

Thank you!ありがとうございます。

About my dream


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Hello everyone!


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I'm Haz.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I havn't been to post for a long time.


I haven't been to post forposted in a long time.

I think what you want to say is that you haven't been here to post in a long time, but I think this way the sentence says the same thing but flows a bit better.

I haven't been able to post for a long time.

So, if you want to say that you haven't posted, as a blunt statement, "I haven't posted in a long time" works best. If you want to communicate that you've been wanting to post, but couldn't for any number of reasons, "I haven't been able to post in a long time." is more natural.

I'll post about I want to do.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I'll post about what I want to do.

Grammatically, this sentence is correct. However, it's not the most natural sounding. It would be more common to say, "I'm going to post what I want to do."

And I made a my list about it.


And I made a my list about it.So I made a list. ¶

You don't need to say, "about it" because it's already clear from everything else you've said, what you're talking about. ¶

Grammatically speaking, "and" is used to show in addition to. Whereas "so" is used colloquially as an explanation. For example:¶

"I'm going shopping. And I'm going out to dinner." This tells us, you're doing both things!¶

"I'm going shopping. So, I'm going out to dinner." The implication here is that going out to dinner will be more convenient because you're out shopping. ¶

So, in this paragraph "so" works better because you're explaining why/what the list is instead of adding a list on to something else.

And I made a my list about it.

You can combine the two above sentences to say "I'll post a list of the things I want to do"

・I want to go to overseas.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

(Canada,Philippines,USA,Korea)


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

・I want to buy a DIANA's Hi heel shoes.


・I want to buy a DIANA's Hi high-heel shoes.

・I want to know about many overseas culture.


・I want to know about many overseas cultures.

・I want to know about many cultures over seas culture.

Personally, I think overseas as a term is better than "foreign" however, that might be a personal/regional thing.

・I want to knowlearn about many overseasforeign cultures.

In this context "learn" is better because its a process. "Many overseas" is fine, but "foreign" is more concise and natural.

・I want to be can speak and listen english.


・I want to be canable to speak and listen eunderstand English.

The idiom for having the ability to speak a language is either "I can speak English" or for example "I am able to speak English". Both are perfectly fine. However, in this context, with a wish or want to do something, I think you need to use 'to be able to'. Also, I think 'understand' makes more sense here because while you can always listen to another language, understanding it is a something different.

・I want to be can speak and listen english.
I want to be fluent in english. ¶

It's more natural, and comprehensive to say you want to be fluent. Fluent/fluency is the ability to read/write/speak/listen in a language. For example: 1) You are fluent in your first language, and would like to be fluent in multiple. 2) I am working on my fluency in english.

Do you think about these?


DWhat do you think about these things?

?


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

?


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

And Do you want to do something?


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

And Do you want to do something?
What would you like to do?

"Do you want to do something?" is correct, however, "what would you like to do?" is more natural.

And Do you want to do something?

?


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I'm waiting for your correct and help.


I'm waiting for your corrections and help.

Please comments in here.


Please comments in here.

if you want to use "comment" as a verb you write it like this, but if you want to use it as a noun you could write 'Please put your comments in here.'

Please comments in here.

Thank you for reading my post.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

-Haz


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

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