Feb. 4, 2022
A Shot in the Dark - P42
Part 42.
This summary was deliberately written in the present tense (analyse it as if it’s taking place as you read it.)
Entering the police station, Inspector Steine finds an unfamiliar face standing across the police station hall. Astonishingly, Steine has no idea that the man is the great “Policeman’s friend” Harry Jupiter; in reality, Steine has never even heard of him. Yet Jupiter’s demeanour strikes Steine as odd. If Steine had known that man was a journalist, he would have had him “led” out of the police station at once. As it happens, Steine bitterly resents journalists. He is irked by their asking questions he has no answers to. He also blames their steadily and massive output of news as the reason landmark events are on the wane. “People just can’t keep up,” Steine reflects. Indeed, tourists in Brighton seem to have forgotten the notorious Middle Street Massacre, which is the only thing he cares about. To top it all*, its waning has given way to the old, wicked image of Brighton portrayed in the film “Brighton Rock.” The whole thing has fuelled even more Steine’s anger towards journalists and ignorant tourists. Thus, it is not unsual to have Inspector Steine intercepting groups of tourists and directing them to his go-to spot, namely Middle Street. Steine thinks that if they have come over to Brighton to sightsee “historical crime sites”—which the film got all wrong—surely they will be keen to go to the place where 45 villains killed themselves in a massive shootout. Which, as a result, wiped out at one stroke every nefarious activity in town.
*Are the expressions “to top it all” and “on top of (that)” really informal? If so, are there any synoyms with that same “emphasis”?
A Shot in the Dark - P42
Part 42.
This summary was deliberately written in the present tense (analyse it as if it’s taking place as you read it. )
Entering the police station, Inspector Steine finds an unfamiliar face standing across the police station hall.
Astonishingly, Steine has no idea that the man is the great “Ppoliceman’s friend” Harry Jupiter; in realityfact, Steine has never even heard of him.
To me, “in fact” sounds more natural here.
Yet Jupiter’s demeanour strikes Steine as odd.
If Steine had known that man was a journalist, he would have had him “led” out of the police station at once.
As it happens, Steine bitterly resents journalists.
He is irked by their asking questions he has no answers to.
He also blames their steadily and massive output of news as the reason landmark events are on the wane.
“People just can’t keep up,” Steine reflects.
Indeed, tourists in Brighton seem to have forgotten the notorious Middle Street Massacre, which is the only thing he cares about.
To top it all* off, its waning has given way to the old, wicked image of Brighton portrayed in the film “Brighton Rock.” The whole thing has fuelled even more Steine’s anger towards journalists and ignorant tourists. even more.
The idiom is “top it all off,” so I added “off.”
Thus, it is not unsual to have Inspector Steine intercepting groups of tourists and directing them to his go-to spot, namely Middle Street.
Steine thinks that if they have come over to Brighton to sightsee “historical crime sites”—which the film got all wrong—surely they will be keen to go to the place where 45 villains killed themselves in a massive shootout.
Which, as a result, wiped out at one stroke every nefarious activity in town.
Feedback
“To top it all off” and “on top of that” are not that informal. You wouldn’t use them in a formal research paper, but for just about everything else, I think they’re fine. You could also use something like “what is/was even worse is/was…” or “to make matters worse” in some cases, but those aren’t any more formal.
March 4, 2022
Many thanks
A Shot in the Dark - P42
Part 42.
This summary was deliberately written in the present tense (analyse it as if it’s taking place as you read it. )
Entering the police station, Inspector Steine finds an unfamiliar face standing across the police station hall.
Astonishingly, Steine has no idea that the man is the great “Ppoliceman’s friend”," Harry Jupiter; i. In reality, Steine has never even heard of him.
Yet Jupiter’s demeanour strikes Steine as odd.
If Steine had known thate man was a journalist, he would have had him “led” out of the police station at once.
As it happens, Steine bitterly resents journalists.
He is irked by their asking questions of he has no answers to.
He also blames their steadily and massive output of news as the reason landmark events are on the wane.
“People just can’t keep up,” Steine reflects.
Indeed, tourists in Brighton seem to have forgotten the notorious Middle Street Massacre, which is the only thing he cares about.
To top it all* off, its waning has given way to the old, wicked image of Brighton portrayed in the film “Brighton Rock.” The whole thing has fuelled even more of Steine’s anger towards journalists and ignorant tourists.
In American-English at least, we use the phrase "to top it all off" more commonly.
Thus, it is not unusual to have Inspector Steine intercepting groups of tourists and directing them to his go-to spot, namely Middle Street.
Steine thinks that if they have come over to Brighton to sightsee the “historical crime sites”—which the film got all wrong—surely they will be keen to go to the place where 45 villains killed themselves in a massive shootout.
WThichs event, as a result, wiped out at one stroke every nefarious activity in town in one stroke .
The sentence needs a subject to be grammatically correct, which is why I added "this event."
*Are the expressions “to top it all” and “on top of (that)” really informal?
I find "to top it all of" a bit more formal than "on top of that." I don't think either are that informal actually, but I do think they add a lot more flavor and character expression. "To top it all off" gives the impression that Steine is really quite exasperated with these events in a "straw that broke the camel's back" kind of way.
If so, are there any synonyms with that same “emphasis”?
I actually can't think of any off the top of my head. I would say just go with "to top it all of" over "on top of that."
Feedback
This is great!
Feb. 4, 2022
Thank you very much for your corrections
A Shot in the Dark - P42
Part 42.
This summary was deliberately written in the present tense (analyse it as if it’s taking place as you read it. )
Entering the police station, Inspector Steine finds an unfamiliar face standing across the police station hall.
Yet Jupiter’s demeanour strikes Steine as odd.
If Steine had known that the man was a journalist, he would have had him “led”"led" him out of the police station at once.
*The* needs to go before any specific nouns (man).
The second sounds more natural.
He also blames their steadily and massive output of news as the reason landmark events are on the wane.
To top it all*, its waning has given way to the old, wicked image of Brighton portrayed in the film “Brighton Rock.” The whole thing has fuelled even more Steine’'s anger towards journalists and ignorant tourists even more.
Which, as a result, wiped out at, in one stroke, every nefarious activity in town.
Feedback
This is a great story! I really like how you expressed it.
Note:
* While they aren't informal per se, they would not be seen in formal (academic) writing. But with the style you're going with, I think it's fine. Some alternatives could be "to add insult to injury".
Feb. 4, 2022
comments*
Feb. 4, 2022
Thanks a lot
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A Shot in the Dark - P42 This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Part 42. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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This summary was deliberately written in the present tense (analyse it as if it’s taking place as you read it. ) This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Entering the police station, Inspector Steine finds an unfamiliar face standing across the police station hall. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Astonishingly, Steine has no idea that the man is the great “Policeman’s friend” Harry Jupiter; in reality, Steine has never even heard of him. Astonishingly, Steine has no idea that the man is the great “ Astonishingly, Steine has no idea that the man is the great “ To me, “in fact” sounds more natural here. |
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Yet Jupiter’s demeanour strikes Steine as odd. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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If Steine had known that man was a journalist, he would have had him “led” out of the police station at once. If Steine had known that the man was a journalist, he would have *The* needs to go before any specific nouns (man). The second sounds more natural. If Steine had known th This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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As it happens, Steine bitterly resents journalists. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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He is irked by their asking questions he has no answers to. He is irked by their asking questions of he has no answers to. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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He also blames their steadily and massive output of news as the reason landmark events are on the wane. He also blames their stead He also blames their stead He also blames their stead |
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“People just can’t keep up,” Steine reflects. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Indeed, tourists in Brighton seem to have forgotten the notorious Middle Street Massacre, which is the only thing he cares about. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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To top it all*, its waning has given way to the old, wicked image of Brighton portrayed in the film “Brighton Rock.” The whole thing has fuelled even more Steine’s anger towards journalists and ignorant tourists. To top it all*, its waning has given way to the old, wicked image of Brighton portrayed in the film “Brighton Rock.” The whole thing has fuelled To top it all In American-English at least, we use the phrase "to top it all off" more commonly. To top it all* off, its waning has given way to the old, wicked image of Brighton portrayed in the film “Brighton Rock.” The whole thing has fuelled The idiom is “top it all off,” so I added “off.” |
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Thus, it is not unsual to have Inspector Steine intercepting groups of tourists and directing them to his go-to spot, namely Middle Street. Thus, it is not unusual to have Inspector Steine intercepting groups of tourists and directing them to his go-to spot, namely Middle Street. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Steine thinks that if they have come over to Brighton to sightsee “historical crime sites”—which the film got all wrong—surely they will be keen to go to the place where 45 villains killed themselves in a massive shootout. Steine thinks that if they have come over to Brighton to sightsee the “historical crime sites”—which the film got all wrong—surely they will be keen to go to the place where 45 villains killed themselves in a massive shootout. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Which, as a result, wiped out at one stroke every nefarious activity in town. Which, as a result, wiped out
The sentence needs a subject to be grammatically correct, which is why I added "this event." This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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*Are the expressions “to top it all” and “on top of (that)” really informal? *Are the expressions “to top it all” and “on top of (that)” really informal? I find "to top it all of" a bit more formal than "on top of that." I don't think either are that informal actually, but I do think they add a lot more flavor and character expression. "To top it all off" gives the impression that Steine is really quite exasperated with these events in a "straw that broke the camel's back" kind of way. |
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If so, are there any synoyms with that same “emphasis”? If so, are there any synonyms with that same I actually can't think of any off the top of my head. I would say just go with "to top it all of" over "on top of that." |
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