Jan. 15, 2023
A regular horror story
Today, I'm recreating this story completely from my mind, so it is going to be very basic.
Down in Alaska, there was a bunker which contained a lot of people and supplies. Why? Because the leader decided to tackle one experiment. He obviously did not say what this experiment is about to his employees, if they would had know what this experiment is about, they would not had accept the job. The experiment was about trying to connect the real world with the meta-physic world.
Everything went wrong, and none of these people could survive to the outcome of the experiment. During the evaluation, many strange and horrifying beings appeared from nowhere and begun to kill everyone they bump into.
As I said before, no one could survive, and rumor has it that the bunker still contains these horrifying monsters down in Alaska.
: )
A regular horror story
Today, I'm recreating this story completely from my mind, so it is going to be very basic’ll be writing an imaginative story, however it will be very basic, given my language of English.
Sophisticated colloquialism !
Down in Alaska, there was a bunker which contained a lot of people and supplies.
Why?
Because thea leader had decided to tackle onean experiment.
Using ‘the’ is too pronounced when you’re just introducing a character for the first time, you can start using ‘the’ once you’ve introduced them once.
He obviously did not say what this experiment iswas truly about to his employees, if they would had know what this experiment iwas about, they would not hadve accepted the job.
Past tense
The experiment was about trying to connect the real world with the meta-physic world.
Everything went wrong, and none of these people could’ve survive tod the outcome of the experiment.
Past tense
During the evaluation, many strange and horrifying beings began to appeared from nowhere and begun to kill everyone they bump intoencountered.
As I said before, no one could survive, and rumor has it that the bunker still contains these horrifying monsters down in Alaska.
Feedback
Scary story ! I would recommend to you to focalise on consistency of tense, in particular, past tense and the perfect tense requires a bit of work, otherwise fantastic !
A rRegular hHorror sStory
Today, I'm recreating this story completely from my mindemory, so it is going to be very basic.
Down in Alaska, there was a bunker which contained a lot of people and supplies.
Why?
Because the leader decided to tackle one experiment.
He obviously did not say what this experiment iwas about to his employees, because if they would had known what this experiment iwas about, they would not hadve accepted the job.
The experiment was about trying to connect the real world with the meta-physical world.
Everything went wrong, and none of these people could survive tod the outcome of the experiment.
During the evaluation, many strange and horrifying beings appeared from nowhere and beguan to kill everyone they bumped into.
As I said before, no one could survived, and rumor has it that the bunker still contains these horrifying monsters down in Alaska.
Feedback
Interesting story. Good work!
Today, I'm recreating this story completely from my mind, so it i's going to be very basic.
He obviously did not say what this experiment iwas about to his employees, if they would had known what this experiment iit was about, they would not hadve accepted the job.
Everything went wrong, and none of these people could survive to the outcome of the experiment.
During the evaluation, many strange and horrifying beings appeared from nowhere and beguan to kill everyone they bumped into.
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A regular horror story A This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Today, I'm recreating this story completely from my mind, so it is going to be very basic. Today, I'm recreating this story completely from my mind, so it Today, I'm recreating this story completely from m Today Sophisticated colloquialism ! |
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Down in Alaska, there was a bunker which contained a lot of people and supplies. This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Why? This sentence has been marked as perfect! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Because the leader decided to tackle one experiment. This sentence has been marked as perfect! Because Using ‘the’ is too pronounced when you’re just introducing a character for the first time, you can start using ‘the’ once you’ve introduced them once. |
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He obviously did not say what this experiment is about to his employees, if they would had know what this experiment is about, they would not had accept the job. He obviously did not say what this experiment He obviously did not say what this experiment He obviously did not say what this experiment Past tense |
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The experiment was about trying to connect the real world with the meta-physic world. The experiment was about trying to connect the real world with the meta This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Everything went wrong, and none of these people could survive to the outcome of the experiment. Everything went wrong, and none of these people could survive Everything went wrong Everything went wrong, and none of these people could’ve survive Past tense |
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During the evaluation, many strange and horrifying beings appeared from nowhere and begun to kill everyone they bump into. During the evaluation, many strange and horrifying beings appeared from nowhere and beg During the evaluation, many strange and horrifying beings appeared from nowhere and beg During the evaluation, many strange and horrifying beings began to appear |
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As I said before, no one could survive, and rumor has it that the bunker still contains these horrifying monsters down in Alaska. As I said before, no one This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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