dagny's avatar
dagny

Dec. 2, 2023

0
A Long-Haul Flight Ordeal

Earlier this year, I traveled to Paris with my friends for a week, and it turned out to be the most memorable trip in my life. I've been to several countries before, but France is my favorite now. Almost everything about its capital city, Paris, appealed to me—its medieval cathedrals, classical art museums, historical monuments, scenic villages, grand department stores, and quaint, teeming streets. Even though it's been 10 months, the cityscape of Paris still lingers vividly in my mind. When I close my eyes, I can picture it in detail.

Going to Paris was completely unexpected. Initially, we had planned to travel abroad in February and had our hearts set on going to Australia because of its summer season. However, due to some unexpected circumstances, we didn't manage to book the flight. We then considered Munich, Germany, as our alternative destination, but found that most direct flights were exorbitantly overpriced. Consequently, we ended up in Paris.

The only thing I didn't like about the trip was having to sit in the middle seat in economy class on the airplane for sixteen hours. Due to the war between Ukraine and Russia, the airline erred on the side of caution and took a bit of a detour, which slightly extended the flight time. In addition, westbound flights are generally longer than eastbound ones because of the Earth's rotation on its axis.

Before this trip, I'd never realized I was prone to getting airsick. I felt nauseous and dizzy during the 16-hour flight. I was also unaware that the distance between Taipei and Paris is greater than the distances from Taipei to London, UK; Reykjavik, Iceland; Stockholm, Sweden; Oslo, Norway; and even Greenland. I suppose my ignorance stemmed from my high exposure to the Mercator projection, the most commonly used projection for world maps. As a standard map projection for navigation, it preserves local directions and shapes but distorts sizes and distances.

We took off at 11 p.m. Taiwan time, so I was supposed to be sleeping on the plane. However, with the unfamiliar surroundings and a worsening headache, sleep eluded me throughout all 16 hours of the flight. I remember sitting uncomfortably in my cramped airplane seat for hours, staring at the entertainment screen, wishing for slumber. Occasionally, the plane's motion lulled me into a sedate sleepiness, and I experienced an odd sensation of drifting between sleep and wakefulness, even though I was actually awake.

When our plane landed in France at 7 a.m. local time, my friends and I decided to start exploring the sights in Paris immediately without heading to the hotel for some rest. By the time we eventually arrived at the hotel and I lay down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time. Since I hadn't slept for more than 48 hours, I went out like a light as soon as I hit the pillow.

Fortunately, I didn't suffer from severe jet lag. When I woke up the next morning, my body seemed to have effortlessly adjusted to the new time; it was as if the jet lag had completely disappeared.

Corrections

A Long-Haul Flight Ordeal

Earlier this year, I traveled to Paris with my friends for a week, and it turned out to be the most memorable trip of my life.

Earlier this year, I traveled to Paris with my friends for a week, and it turned out to be the most memorable trip in my life.

"of my life" is more common

I've been to several countries before, but France is definitely my favorite now.

I've been to several countries before, but France is my favorite now.

Almost everything about its capital city, Paris, appealed to me—its medieval cathedrals, classical art museums, historical monuments, scenic villages, grand department stores, and quaint, teeming streets.

Almost everything about its capital city, Paris, appealed to me—its medieval cathedrals, classical art museums, historic monuments, scenic villages, grand department stores, and quaint, teeming streets.

Even though it has been 10 months, I still can't get itsthe cityscape out of my mind.

Even though it's been 10 months, the cityscape of Paris still lingers vividly in my mind.

When I close my eyes, I can picture it in detail.

Going to Paris was completely unexpected.

Initially, we had planned to travel abroad in February and had our hearts set on going to Australia because of its summer season.

However, due to some unexpected circumstances, we didn't manage to book the flight.

We then considered Munich, Germany, as our alternative destination, but found that most direct flights were exorbitantly overpriced.

We then chose Munich, Germany, as our destination, but found that most direct flights were exorbitantly overpriced.

Consequently, we ended up in Paris.

So, we ended up in Paris.

The only thing I didn't like about the trip was having to sit in the middle seat in economy class on the airplane for sixteen hours.

Due to the war between Ukraine and Russia, the airline erred on the side of caution and took a bit of a detour, which slightly extended the flight time.

In addition, westbound flights are generally longer than eastbound ones because of the Earth's rotation on its axis.

Before this trip, I'd never realized I was prone to getting airsick.

I felt nauseous and dizzy during the 16-hour flight.

I was also unaware that the distance between Taipei and Paris is greater than the distances from Taipei to London, UK; Reykjavik, Iceland; Stockholm, Sweden; Oslo, Norway; and even Greenland.

I suppose my ignorance stemmed from my high exposure to the Mercator projection, which is the most commonly used projection for world maps.

I suppose my ignorance stemmed from my high exposure to the Mercator projection, the most commonly used projection for world maps.

As a standard map projection for navigation, it preserves local directions and shapes but distorts sizes and distances.

We took off at 11 p.m. Taiwan time, so I was supposed to be sleeping on the plane.

But the reality was that, with the unfamiliar surroundings and a worsening headache, sleep eluded me throughout all 16 hours of the flight.

However, with the unfamiliar surroundings and a worsening headache, sleep eluded me throughout all 16 hours of the flight.

I remember sitting uncomfortably in my cramped airplane seat for hours, staring at the entertainment screen, wishing for slumber.

I remember that I sat uncomfortably in my cramped airplane seat for hours staring at the entertainment screen, wishing for slumber.

Occasionally, the motion of the plane lulled me into a sedated sleepiness, and I experienced an odd sensation of drifting between sleep and wakefulness, even though I was actually awake.

Occasionally, the plane's motion lulled me into a sedated sleepiness, and I experienced an odd sensation of drifting between sleep and wakefulness, even though I was actually awake.

When our plane landed in France at 7 a.m. local time, my friends and I decided to start looking at the sights in Paris right away without first heading to the hotel for some rest.

When our plane landed in France at 7 a.m. local time, my friends and I decided to start exploring the sights in Paris immediately without heading to the hotel for some rest.

By the time we eventually arrived at the hotel and I layid down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time.

By the time we finally arrived at the hotel and I layid down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time, which meant I hadn't slept for more than 48 hours.

Since I hadn't slept for more than 48 hours, I went out like a light as soon as I hit the pillow.

Sure enough, I went out like a light as soon as I hit the pillow.

Fortunately, I didn't suffer from severe jet lag.

When I woke up the next morning, my body seemed to have effortlessly adjusted to the new time; it was as if the jet lag had completely disappeared.

Feedback

Great job!

A Long-Haul Flight Ordeal

Earlier this year, I traveled to Paris with my friends for a week, and it turned out to be the most memorable trip in my life.

I've been to several countries before, but France is definitely my favorite now.

Almost everything about its capital city, Paris, appealed to me—its medieval cathedrals, classical art museums, historical monuments, scenic villages, grand department stores, and quaint, teeming streets.

quaint and teeming do not go together.
How can a street full of people also be quaint?

Even though it's been 10 months, the cityscape of Paris still lingers vividly in my mind.

When I close my eyes, I can (still) picture it in detail.

Going to Paris was completely unexpected.

Initially, we had planned to travel abroad in February and had our hearts set on going to Australia because of its summer season.

However, due to some unexpected circumstances, we didn't manage to book thea flight.

We then considered Munich, Germany, as our alternative destination, but found that most direct flights were exorbitantly overpriced.

We then chose Munich, Germany, as our destination, but found that most direct flights were exorbitantly overpriced.

Consequently, we ended up in Paris.

SoConsequently, we ended up in Paris.

Never start a sentence with a coordinating conjunction (and, so, for, but)

The only thing I didn't like about the trip was having to sit in the middle seat in economy class on the airplane for sixteen hours.

Due to the war between Ukraine and Russia, the airline erred on the side of caution and took a bit of a detour, which slightly extended the flight time.

In addition, westbound flights are generally longer than eastbound ones because of the Earth's rotation on its axis.

Before this trip, I'd never realized I was prone to getting airsick.

I felt nauseous and dizzy during the 16-hour flight.

I was also unaware that the distance between Taipei and Paris is greater than the distances from Taipei to London, UK; Reykjavik, Iceland; Stockholm, Sweden; Oslo, Norway; and even Greenland.

I suppose my ignorance stemmed from my high exposure tooverreliance on the Mercator projection, the most commonly used projection ofor world maps.

high exposure to radiation, high exposure to chemicals, but we don't say high exposure to something like the Mercator's projection

As a standard map projection for navigation, it preserves local directions and shapes but distorts sizes and distances.

We took off at 11 p.m. Taiwan time, so I was supposed to be sleeping on the plane.

However, with thean unfamiliar surroundings and a worsening headache, sleep eluded me throughout all 16 hours of the flight.

"an" and "the" could both work, but I would use "an" here because you have not mentioned the surrounding before.

I remember sitting uncomfortably in my cramped airplane seat for hours, staring at the entertainment screen, wishing for slumbereep.

slumber has a negative connotation.
"Like the offense, the defense slumbered through the first quarters of the past two games."

Occasionally, the plane's motion lulled me into a sedtate of sleepiness, and I experienced an odd sensation of drifting between sleep and wakefulness, even though I was actually awake.

sedate: to tranquilize someone or an animal
it can be used as an adjective too but "sedate sleepiness" sounds very weird, even though it is grammatically correct

When our plane landed in France at 7 a.m. local time, my friends and I decided to start looking at the sights in Paris right away without first heading to the hotel for some rest.

By the time we eventually arrived at the hotel and I layied down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time.

You can lay something down, but you yourself LIE down.
https://www.grammarly.com/blog/lay-lie/#:~:text=The%20words%20lie%20and%20lay,in%20a%20horizontal%20resting%20position

Sure enough, I went out like a light as soon as I hit the pillow.

Since I hadn't slept been awake for more than 48 hours, I went out like a light as soon as I hit the pillow.

The negation makes it unclear because by saying "I hadn't slept for 48 hours", it could also imply that you might have slept for 47 hours.

Fortunately, I didn't suffer from severe jet lag.

When I woke up the next morning, my body seemed to have effortlessly adjusted to the new time; it was as if the jet lag had completely disappeared.

Feedback

I think there was something wrong with the processing of this journal entry because I see many repeated sentences that sometimes the same, sometimes different.

dagny's avatar
dagny

Dec. 2, 2023

0

Thank you so much for your corrections!

Regarding the sentence "By the time we eventually arrived at the hotel and I lay down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time," the reason why I used lay is that it is the past tense of "lie."

Lay/laid/laid - to set something down, to put something or someone into a prone position.

Lie/lay/lain - to get into a prone position yourself.

sylvanas's avatar
sylvanas

Dec. 2, 2023

0

After verifying, it is indeed like that. I have never seen the word "lain" used before either, but it is grammatically correct. Thanks for bringing this up!

A Long-Haul Flight Ordeal


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Earlier this year, I traveled to Paris with my friends for a week, and it turned out to be the most memorable trip of my life.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I've been to several countries before, but France is definitely my favorite now.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Almost everything about its capital city, Paris, appealed to me—its medieval cathedrals, classical art museums, historic monuments, scenic villages, grand department stores, and quaint, teeming streets.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Even though it has been 10 months, I still can't get its cityscape out of my mind.


Even though it has been 10 months, I still can't get itsthe cityscape out of my mind.

When I close my eyes, I can picture it in detail.


When I close my eyes, I can (still) picture it in detail.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Going to Paris was completely unexpected.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Initially, we had planned to travel abroad in February and had our hearts set on going to Australia because of its summer season.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

However, due to some unexpected circumstances, we didn't manage to book the flight.


However, due to some unexpected circumstances, we didn't manage to book thea flight.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

We then chose Munich, Germany, as our destination, but found that most direct flights were exorbitantly overpriced.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

So, we ended up in Paris.


SoConsequently, we ended up in Paris.

Never start a sentence with a coordinating conjunction (and, so, for, but)

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

The only thing I didn't like about the trip was having to sit in the middle seat in economy class on the airplane for sixteen hours.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Due to the war between Ukraine and Russia, the airline erred on the side of caution and took a bit of a detour, which slightly extended the flight time.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

In addition, westbound flights are generally longer than eastbound ones because of the Earth's rotation on its axis.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Before this trip, I'd never realized I was prone to getting airsick.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I felt nauseous and dizzy during the 16-hour flight.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I was also unaware that the distance between Taipei and Paris is greater than the distances from Taipei to London, UK; Reykjavik, Iceland; Stockholm, Sweden; Oslo, Norway; and even Greenland.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I suppose my ignorance stemmed from my high exposure to the Mercator projection, which is the most commonly used projection for world maps.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

As a standard map projection for navigation, it preserves local directions and shapes but distorts sizes and distances.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

We took off at 11 p.m. Taiwan time, so I was supposed to be sleeping on the plane.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

But the reality was that, with the unfamiliar surroundings and a worsening headache, sleep eluded me throughout all 16 hours of the flight.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I remember that I sat uncomfortably in my cramped airplane seat for hours staring at the entertainment screen, wishing for slumber.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Occasionally, the motion of the plane lulled me into a sedate sleepiness, and I experienced an odd sensation of drifting between sleep and wakefulness, even though I was actually awake.


Occasionally, the motion of the plane lulled me into a sedated sleepiness, and I experienced an odd sensation of drifting between sleep and wakefulness, even though I was actually awake.

When our plane landed in France at 7 a.m. local time, my friends and I decided to start looking at the sights in Paris right away without first heading to the hotel for some rest.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

By the time we finally arrived at the hotel and I lay down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time, which meant I hadn't slept for more than 48 hours.


By the time we finally arrived at the hotel and I layid down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time, which meant I hadn't slept for more than 48 hours.

Sure enough, I went out like a light as soon as I hit the pillow.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Fortunately, I didn't suffer from severe jet lag.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

When I woke up the next morning, my body seemed to have effortlessly adjusted to the new time; it was as if the jet lag had completely disappeared.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I've been to several countries before, but France is my favorite now.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Almost everything about its capital city, Paris, appealed to me—its medieval cathedrals, classical art museums, historical monuments, scenic villages, grand department stores, and quaint, teeming streets.


Almost everything about its capital city, Paris, appealed to me—its medieval cathedrals, classical art museums, historical monuments, scenic villages, grand department stores, and quaint, teeming streets.

quaint and teeming do not go together. How can a street full of people also be quaint?

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Even though it's been 10 months, the cityscape of Paris still lingers vividly in my mind.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

We then considered Munich, Germany, as our alternative destination, but found that most direct flights were exorbitantly overpriced.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Consequently, we ended up in Paris.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I suppose my ignorance stemmed from my high exposure to the Mercator projection, the most commonly used projection for world maps.


I suppose my ignorance stemmed from my high exposure tooverreliance on the Mercator projection, the most commonly used projection ofor world maps.

high exposure to radiation, high exposure to chemicals, but we don't say high exposure to something like the Mercator's projection

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

However, with the unfamiliar surroundings and a worsening headache, sleep eluded me throughout all 16 hours of the flight.


However, with thean unfamiliar surroundings and a worsening headache, sleep eluded me throughout all 16 hours of the flight.

"an" and "the" could both work, but I would use "an" here because you have not mentioned the surrounding before.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I remember sitting uncomfortably in my cramped airplane seat for hours, staring at the entertainment screen, wishing for slumber.


I remember sitting uncomfortably in my cramped airplane seat for hours, staring at the entertainment screen, wishing for slumbereep.

slumber has a negative connotation. "Like the offense, the defense slumbered through the first quarters of the past two games."

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Occasionally, the plane's motion lulled me into a sedate sleepiness, and I experienced an odd sensation of drifting between sleep and wakefulness, even though I was actually awake.


Occasionally, the plane's motion lulled me into a sedtate of sleepiness, and I experienced an odd sensation of drifting between sleep and wakefulness, even though I was actually awake.

sedate: to tranquilize someone or an animal it can be used as an adjective too but "sedate sleepiness" sounds very weird, even though it is grammatically correct

Occasionally, the plane's motion lulled me into a sedated sleepiness, and I experienced an odd sensation of drifting between sleep and wakefulness, even though I was actually awake.

When our plane landed in France at 7 a.m. local time, my friends and I decided to start exploring the sights in Paris immediately without heading to the hotel for some rest.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

By the time we eventually arrived at the hotel and I lay down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time.


By the time we eventually arrived at the hotel and I layied down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time.

You can lay something down, but you yourself LIE down. https://www.grammarly.com/blog/lay-lie/#:~:text=The%20words%20lie%20and%20lay,in%20a%20horizontal%20resting%20position

By the time we eventually arrived at the hotel and I layid down on the bed, it was already 11 p.m. local time.

Since I hadn't slept for more than 48 hours, I went out like a light as soon as I hit the pillow.


Since I hadn't slept been awake for more than 48 hours, I went out like a light as soon as I hit the pillow.

The negation makes it unclear because by saying "I hadn't slept for 48 hours", it could also imply that you might have slept for 47 hours.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Earlier this year, I traveled to Paris with my friends for a week, and it turned out to be the most memorable trip in my life.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Earlier this year, I traveled to Paris with my friends for a week, and it turned out to be the most memorable trip in my life.

"of my life" is more common

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