I hadve a job thatwhere I worked eight hours every day, from 0 to 8am yesterday(12am / midnight) to 8am.

If you're using am/pm, the hours go 12am, 1am... 11am, 12pm, 1pm... 11pm - there is no hour 0 with am/pm

Also people tend to say midnight more often than 12am.

Yesterday is "the day before today", but since you're talking about something you did "every day" it's not only limited to yesterday.

"I had a job where I worked 8 hours every day" implies you no longer have this job, because you're talking about it in the past tense. But later on you start talking about stuff that happened this morning, so I think you do still have this job so it's more natural to talk about the job in the present tense.

I was too tired to do anythings after work, so I took a quick shower and rushed to bed as soon as I canould.

As a consequence, I missed a alarm clock that iwas set at 1:45pm and woke up at 2:30pm.

The tense switch here is kind of unnatural. Up until now you had been talking about "where I worked every day", and so you were talking about an ongoing/recurring fact because of the "every day". But now you've switched to a single occurrence.

I had no car so I had to order two train tickets of trains on time for my parents when them release ony (got out of work?) at 2pm.

Not quite sure what you mean by release, so took a guess.

As a result, I made them be candidates to get the rest of the tickets.

I don't know if it would work or not eventually.

There was a girl thatwho was my colleague, who got back home today and neverwon't be back to the company again.

As in, she quit her job today?

ThaIt was funny to get alongspend time with her because she was really beautiful and good at making us laugh.

"get along with" is more describing your relationship than a specific activity, so I think you want "spend time with" here.

She's supposed to be in a car with her family, certainly on the way home right now.

I had been though sentinking of sending her a gift, a book or something otherselse.

"others" is mainly used with people.

I'll miss her, Ren!

Is Ren her name? In that case you'd replace "her" with "Ren"

I had a job thatwhere I worked eight hours every day, from 0 to 8 am yesterday.

This is in the past tense, you are talking about a time in the far past so you would say "where" not "that" also the use of everyday in this sentence is one word not two.

I was too tired to do anythings after work, so I took a quick shower and rushed to bed as soon as I canould.

anything never has the s at the end, also can needs to be in the past tense.

As a consequenceUnfortunately, I missed amy alarm clock that iwas set atfor 1:45pm andhowever, I woke up at 2:30pm.

No one says "as a consequence" use "Unfortunately" it sounds more natural.

I hadid not have a car so I had to order two tickets of trains on time for my parents when them release on 2pmrain tickets my parents.

Not sure what you are saying on the last part of the sentence.

As a result, I madetold them be candidates to get the rest of tickets.to get the tickets in the future.

this sentence doesn't make sense

I don't know if it would work or not eventually.

There was a girl that was my colleague, who got backreturned home today and. She will never come back to companywork again.

Confusing sentence, not sure what you are saying

ThatShe was funny to get along with her because she was reallyand beautiful, and good at makingshe always made us laugh.

This sounds more natural

She supposed to beRight now she is in athe care with her family, certainly on ther way home right now.

sounds more natural like this

I had been thoughwish I had sent her a gift, a book or something others.else.

I' will miss her,you Ren!