April 2, 2021
Spanglish! ๐ฌ๐ฅฐ
Writing Challenge: Day 1
Thursday, April 1st, 2021
There's a defining moment in every film we watch.
For those of you who remember the movie Spanglish:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanglish_(film)
Do you remember what was the defining moment in the film? ๐ค
Of course to each of us a defining moment in everything in life including the films we watch, so it's not a one-answer-fits-all kind of thing. I remember liking Flor's attitude in the film and the way she insisted that she's Cristina's mom to stop those who tried to interfere in the way she was raising her daughter. None of this though was the reason that made me remember "Spanglish" always.
The real defining moment of the film was when Cristina was upset over something and her mother stopped her from being sad or shedding tears. She only allowed her to shed that one tear she had in her eyes already at that moment and that's it ๐
That scene reminded me of every hardship we passed in life and how important it was to let go of it as fast as we could. Constant dwelling on the past especially tough and sad situations would only bring sadness and sadness brings physical and mental illnesses.
Last time I was really stressed in my life, a wrinkle was formed on my face, so I've learned my lesson :D Never again! Seeing that one wrinkle in the mirror was another defining moment as well ๐๐ปโโ๏ธ
What I'm trying to say is that if you are passing a real hard situation and thinking about it won't help you solve anything, the best thing to do is let go of it and anyone who is reminding you of it. Surrounding yourself with fun things to do and people with good attitudes in life can be contagious and this is exactly what I think we all should focus on. Along with positive thinking since most, if not all, the things happening in our lives are products of our own thoughts.
I love to laugh and I keep some silly stuff where I can constantly see them because they make me giggle and lighten up my mood no matter how awful is the day I passed ๐
Correction Settings
Spanglish! ๐ฌ๐ฅฐ
Writing Challenge: Day 1
Thursday, April 1st, 2021
There's a defining moment in every film we watch.
For those of you who remember the movie Spanglish:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanglish_(film)
Do you remember what was the defining moment in the film was?
Do you remember what the defining moment in the film was?
Your sentence is perfectly ok but it sounds more natural to have 'was' at the end :)
๐ค
Of course, to each of us a defining moment in everything in life, including the films we watch, so it'is not a one-answer-fits-all kind of thing.
Of course, to each of us a defining moment in everything in life, including the films we watch, is not a one-answer-fits-all kind of thing.
Added some more commas and changed the end part of the sentence to match the first half :)
I remember liking Flor's attitude in the film and the way she insisted that she's Cristina's mom to stop those who tried to interfere in the way she was raising her daughter.
None of this though was the reason that made me remember "Spanglish" always.
None of this though was the reason that made me remember "Spanglish".
'always' not needed at the end :)
The real defining moment of the film was when Cristina was upset over something and her mother stopped her from being sad or shedding tears.
She only allowed her to shed that one tear she had in her eyes already at that moment, and that's it ๐ She only allowed her to shed that one tear she had in her eyes already at that moment, and that's it ๐
Added comma :)
That scene reminded me of every hardship we passed in life, and how important it wais to let go of it as fast as we couldan.
That scene reminded me of every hardship we pass in life, and how important it is to let go of it as fast as we can.
Past tense sounds odd here, I would use present tense :)
Added another comma!
Constantly dwelling on the past, especially tough and sad situations, would only bring sadness and sadness brings physical and mental illnesses. Constantly dwelling on the past, especially tough and sad situations, would only bring sadness and sadness brings physical and mental illnesses.
Added some more commas again :)
Last time I was really stressed in my life, a wrinkle was formed on my face, so I've learned my lesson :D Never again!
Seeing that one wrinkle in the mirror was another defining moment as well ๐๐ปโโ๏ธ
What I'm trying to say is that if you are passinggoing through a real hard situation and thinking about it won't help you solve anything, t. The best thing to do is let go of it and anyone who is reminding you of it.
What I'm trying to say is that if you are going through a real hard situation and thinking about it won't help you solve anything. The best thing to do is let go of it and anyone who is reminding you of it.
'going through' is a common phrase but 'passing' isn't bad either!
Split this into two sentences :)
Surrounding yourself with fun things to do and people with good attitudes in life can be contagious and this is exactly what I think we all should focus on.
Along with positive thinking, since most, if not all, the things happening in our lives, are products of our own thoughts.
Along with positive thinking, since most, if not all the things happening in our lives, are products of our own thoughts.
Rearranged commas :)
I love to laugh and I keep some silly stuff where I can constantly see them because they make me giggle and lighten up my mood no matter how awful is the day I passedwas ๐
I love to laugh and I keep some silly stuff where I can constantly see them because they make me giggle and lighten up my mood no matter how awful the day was ๐
In English we only use 'pass' to talk about 'passing/wasting time' so I've changed the words to how I would say it :)
Feedback
Fantastic and incredible job! Easily understood and very in depth! I'd recommend using a few more commas. One for every time you would take a breath when speaking and to make a new sentence for every time you make a new point. This is only me being very nit picky though! Really really good job :)
April 4, 2021
Thank you very much, aaroneuz : ) I appreciate your time, and you being a very 'nit picky' corrector :D
(Quick question please: Is it better to write nit picky when used as an adj. as one word (nitpicky)? or maybe with a hyphen (nit-picky)? or the way you used it as two separate words?
I had no idea that using many commas is ok and that "to pass" meant that too! Very enlightening and helpful.
April 4, 2021
I actually have no idea haha! I say 'nit picky' as two words but I've seen it as one word 'nitpicky' and 'nit-picky'. Think it's a personal choice or maybe a reigonal thing :P
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There's a defining moment in every film we watch. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Thursday, April 1st, 2021 This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Spanglish! ๐ฌ๐ฅฐ This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Writing Challenge: Day 1 This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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For those of you who remember the movie Spanglish: This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanglish_(film) This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Do you remember what was the defining moment in the film?
Do you remember what Your sentence is perfectly ok but it sounds more natural to have 'was' at the end :) |
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๐ค This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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Of course to each of us a defining moment in everything in life including the films we watch, so it's not a one-answer-fits-all kind of thing.
Of course, to each of us a defining moment in everything in life, including the films we watch, Added some more commas and changed the end part of the sentence to match the first half :) |
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I remember liking Flor's attitude in the film and the way she insisted that she's Cristina's mom to stop those who tried to interfere in the way she was raising her daughter. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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None of this though was the reason that made me remember "Spanglish" always.
None of this though was the reason that made me remember "Spanglish" 'always' not needed at the end :) |
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The real defining moment of the film was when Cristina was upset over something and her mother stopped her from being sad or shedding tears. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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She only allowed her to shed that one tear she had in her eyes already at that moment and that's it ๐ She only allowed her to shed that one tear she had in her eyes already at that moment, and that's it ๐ She only allowed her to shed that one tear she had in her eyes already at that moment, and that's it ๐ Added comma :) |
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That scene reminded me of every hardship we passed in life and how important it was to let go of it as fast as we could.
That scene reminded me of every hardship we pass Past tense sounds odd here, I would use present tense :) Added another comma! |
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Constant dwelling on the past especially tough and sad situations would only bring sadness and sadness brings physical and mental illnesses. Constantly dwelling on the past, especially tough and sad situations, would only bring sadness and sadness brings physical and mental illnesses. Constantly dwelling on the past, especially tough and sad situations, would only bring sadness and sadness brings physical and mental illnesses. Added some more commas again :) |
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Last time I was really stressed in my life, a wrinkle was formed on my face, so I've learned my lesson :D Never again! This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
|
Seeing that one wrinkle in the mirror was another defining moment as well ๐๐ปโโ๏ธ This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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What I'm trying to say is that if you are passing a real hard situation and thinking about it won't help you solve anything, the best thing to do is let go of it and anyone who is reminding you of it.
What I'm trying to say is that if you are 'going through' is a common phrase but 'passing' isn't bad either! Split this into two sentences :) |
|
Surrounding yourself with fun things to do and people with good attitudes in life can be contagious and this is exactly what I think we all should focus on. This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
|
Along with positive thinking since most, if not all, the things happening in our lives are products of our own thoughts.
Along with positive thinking, since most, if not all Rearranged commas :) |
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I love to laugh and I keep some silly stuff where I can constantly see them because they make me giggle and lighten up my mood no matter how awful is the day I passed ๐
I love to laugh and I keep some silly stuff where I can constantly see them because they make me giggle and lighten up my mood no matter how awful In English we only use 'pass' to talk about 'passing/wasting time' so I've changed the words to how I would say it :) |
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