tana_gao's avatar
tana_gao

Feb. 28, 2022

0
022801 - Finding Jobs

I am still waiting for my dream school's offer. I chose computer science as my major because it is a competitive skill to help me live in another country. This month, I practiced speaking English every day, and I dream to go to New York City. But however, through friends and online forums, I learned that the competition is so fierce this year, and many talented candidates are not selected. Hope I have good luck!

I also have to consider plan B of the situation that perhaps objective factors would prevent me from leaving where I live. So I have decided to start finding jobs this month. I have two internship experiences, so I am not scared to interview. But I have never been to an interview in English. This time I would try to apply for some international companies, have fun!

writing
Corrections

022801 - Finding Jobs

I am still waiting for my dream school's offer.

Alt: I am still waiting for an offer from my dream school.

I chose to major in computer science as my major because it is a competitive skill to help mefield and would give me the opportunity to live in another country.

This month, I practiced speaking English every day, and. I dream tof going to New York City.

But hHowever, through friends and online forums, I learned that the competition is so fierce this year, and m. Many talented candidates are not selhave been rejected.

Hope I have good luck!

Alt: Hopefully, I will have better luck!

That said, I also have to consider plan B of the situation that perhaps. Perhaps there are objective factors that would prevent me from leaving where I live, which is why I have decided to start my job search this month.

So I have decided to start finding jobs this month.

I have had two internship experiences, so I am not scared to intervconfident about my abilitiews.

ButHowever, I have never been to an interviewed in English before.

This time I would tryI plan to apply for positions at some international companies, have fun!.

tana_gao's avatar
tana_gao

March 1, 2022

0

Thanks, I love your clear sentences!

022801 - Finding Jobs

I am still waiting for my dream school's offer.

I chose computer science as my major, because it is a competitive skill to help me live in another country.

The only bit of this sentence that actually sounds strange to me is "a competitive skill to help me (...)" - maybe this is better, "a competitive skill, that will help me".

Also I think "skillset" might be better than "skill", since computer science is a whole field of knowledge, a range of skills.

This month, I practiced speaking English every day, and. I dream to go to New York City.

Possibly neater to break this sentence up - or probably better to say, "This month, I practiced speaking English every day, because I dream of going to New York City".

But hHowever, through friends and online forums, I learned that the competition is so fierce this year, andthat many talented candidates are not selhave been rejected.

Definitely don't write "But,". You can start a sentence with "But" without a comma though of course!

The other reviewer assumed you wanted to use the future tense "will not be selected". I think that was probably your intention too, but I suggested an alternative...

Hope I have good luck!

I also have to consider plan B ofor the situation, that perhaps objective factors would prevent me from leaving where I live.

There is nothing wrong with this sentence, except for "of" --> "for".

So I have decided to start finding jobs this month.

I have two internship experiences, so I am not scared tof interviews.

Feedback

Every entry you write is perfectly clear. Please don't worry about your English! It's really good, and you should be confident and proud 👍

jogeumman's avatar
jogeumman

Feb. 28, 2022

0

Hi yuraaa, you suggested "Hope to have a good luck", but that's not right...

"Hope I have good luck" is correct.

Did you know, by the way, that you can edit your corrections by either clicking the ellipsis icon on the bottom right corner of the correction box, or alternatively clicking the blue "Make a correction" button at the top of the page again? Cheers 👍

tana_gao's avatar
tana_gao

March 1, 2022

0

Thanks for your encouragement and detailed footnotes, I always learned new things from them! hope your Korean learning schedule is well!

022801 - Finding Jobs

I am still waiting for my dream school's offer.

I chose to major in computer science as my major, because it is a competitive skill to help merequired major in order to work and live in another country.

This month, I practiced speaking English every day, and I dream tof going to New York City.

But hHowever, through friends and online forums, I learned that the competition is so fierce this year, and many talented candidates arewill not be selected.

I also have to considerneed to have a plan B ofor theis situation that perhaps, which objective factors wouldmay prevent me from leaving where I live.my country

So I have decided to start finding jobs this month.

I have two internship experiences, so I am not scaredconfident to be interviewed.

But I have never been to an interview in English.

This time I would try to apply for some international companies, have fun!

jogeumman's avatar
jogeumman

Feb. 28, 2022

0

Hi yuraaa, you suggested "Hope to have a good luck", but that's not right...

"Hope I have good luck" is correct.

Did you know, by the way, that you can edit your corrections by either clicking the ellipsis icon on the bottom right corner of the correction box, or alternatively clicking the blue "Make a correction" button at the top of the page again? Cheers 👍

yuraaa_'s avatar
yuraaa_

Feb. 28, 2022

0

Oh! u're right. since i corrected it in a hurry, didnt notice that~~ thanks for letting me know~

tana_gao's avatar
tana_gao

March 1, 2022

0

Thank you, jogeumman and yuraaa_, it really helps!

022801 - Finding Jobs


022801 - Finding Jobs

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I am still waiting for my dream school's offer.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

I am still waiting for my dream school's offer.

Alt: I am still waiting for an offer from my dream school.

I chose computer science as my major because it is a competitive skill to help me live in another country.


I chose to major in computer science as my major, because it is a competitive skill to help merequired major in order to work and live in another country.

I chose computer science as my major, because it is a competitive skill to help me live in another country.

The only bit of this sentence that actually sounds strange to me is "a competitive skill to help me (...)" - maybe this is better, "a competitive skill, that will help me". Also I think "skillset" might be better than "skill", since computer science is a whole field of knowledge, a range of skills.

I chose to major in computer science as my major because it is a competitive skill to help mefield and would give me the opportunity to live in another country.

This month, I practiced speaking English every day, and I dream to go to New York City.


This month, I practiced speaking English every day, and I dream tof going to New York City.

This month, I practiced speaking English every day, and. I dream to go to New York City.

Possibly neater to break this sentence up - or probably better to say, "This month, I practiced speaking English every day, because I dream of going to New York City".

This month, I practiced speaking English every day, and. I dream tof going to New York City.

But however, through friends and online forums, I learned that the competition is so fierce this year, and many talented candidates are not selected.


But hHowever, through friends and online forums, I learned that the competition is so fierce this year, and many talented candidates arewill not be selected.

But hHowever, through friends and online forums, I learned that the competition is so fierce this year, andthat many talented candidates are not selhave been rejected.

Definitely don't write "But,". You can start a sentence with "But" without a comma though of course! The other reviewer assumed you wanted to use the future tense "will not be selected". I think that was probably your intention too, but I suggested an alternative...

But hHowever, through friends and online forums, I learned that the competition is so fierce this year, and m. Many talented candidates are not selhave been rejected.

Hope I have good luck!


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

Hope I have good luck!

Alt: Hopefully, I will have better luck!

I also have to consider plan B of the situation that perhaps objective factors would prevent me from leaving where I live.


I also have to considerneed to have a plan B ofor theis situation that perhaps, which objective factors wouldmay prevent me from leaving where I live.my country

I also have to consider plan B ofor the situation, that perhaps objective factors would prevent me from leaving where I live.

There is nothing wrong with this sentence, except for "of" --> "for".

That said, I also have to consider plan B of the situation that perhaps. Perhaps there are objective factors that would prevent me from leaving where I live, which is why I have decided to start my job search this month.

So I have decided to start finding jobs this month.


So I have decided to start finding jobs this month.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

So I have decided to start finding jobs this month.

I have two internship experiences, so I am not scared to interview.


I have two internship experiences, so I am not scaredconfident to be interviewed.

I have two internship experiences, so I am not scared tof interviews.

I have had two internship experiences, so I am not scared to intervconfident about my abilitiews.

But I have never been to an interview in English.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

ButHowever, I have never been to an interviewed in English before.

This time I would try to apply for some international companies, have fun!


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

This time I would tryI plan to apply for positions at some international companies, have fun!.

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