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benderbot

April 9, 2020

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梦日志账目第一

这个梦来得比我的别梦早成真理。
我上一些石级。别人看天和山包离我后边。我的头起来。我前边扠石级。石级上边有一个大的铜像的翅人。我往山包拐。我下边也有一条曲里拐弯的河。渡船向古前哨和古堡带。推而广之天下边飘然蓬松的云。


This dream is the earliest dream that became true.

I found myself walking up a series of stone steps. People near me looked up and outwards toward the hills behind me. I tilt my head up to see the stairs split in a fork. A large bronze monument of a winged being stood upon the higher platform where the stairs again meet. I turned around to look at the hills. Below there was also a river. Small ferries sailed across the river, carrying passengers to the small outposts and castles. Similarly, puffy clouds ferried across the sky.

Corrections

梦日志:第一账目第一

Numbering must go before what it modifies.

这个梦来得比我的别梦早成真理在有成真的梦里,这是我最早的

You could also rewrite it to suit your original order more, but I think this sounds less cluttered.

我上一些石级。

别人看天和山包离我后边。

我的头起来向上看

起来 seems closer in meaning to "get up."

我前边石级岔开

梦日志账目第一


梦日志:第一账目第一

Numbering must go before what it modifies.

这个梦来得比我的别梦早成真理。


这个梦来得比我的别梦早成真理在有成真的梦里,这是我最早的

You could also rewrite it to suit your original order more, but I think this sounds less cluttered.

我上一些石级。


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

别人看天和山包离我后边。


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

我的头起来。


我的头起来向上看

起来 seems closer in meaning to "get up."

我前边扠石级。


我前边石级岔开

石级上边有一个大的铜像的翅人。


我往山包拐。


我下边也有一条曲里拐弯的河。


渡船向古前哨和古堡带。


推而广之天下边飘然蓬松的云。


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