May 1, 2020
在公園學習
今天我沒上班，打算整天在家玩遊戲、學習外語、打掃房間。可是流了幾小時以後我很無聊。所以我決定去我家附近的公園。不但我有空，而且天氣很好，所以我覺得去公園是個不錯的想法。我把韓國小說和法果課本、手機等裝在我背包裡，然後出了門。公園離我家不遠，只要走十分鐘就可以到。一到公園，我坐在樹下，開始看書。看書以後，我學了一點法語文化。我覺得在公園裡學習很舒服。將來如果有機會我很想再一次去那裡。
在公園學習
可是流過了幾小時以後我很無聊。
所以我決定去我家附近的公園。
I'm not sure if it's a variation that I'm just not used to, but 所以 at the beginning of a sentence sounds odd in formal writing to me, unless it's in the context of a question: https://hinative.com/zh-CN/questions/378747 (It's kind of like using a subordinating conjunction in a sentence without an independent clause.) I would merge it with the last sentence or reword it a bit.
我把韓國小說和法果、法語課本、手機等裝在我背包裡，然後出了門。
公園離我家不遠，只要走十分鐘就可以到。
一到公園，我坐在樹下，開始看書。
看書以後，我學了一點法語文化。
我覺得在公園裡學習很舒服。
將來如果有機會我很想再一次去那裡。
Feedback
Great job! This seemed fairly accurate to me, just a few small typos, mostly.
May 2, 2020
所以我決定去我家附近的公園。
use “于是” is more natural in this case. "所以“ more strictly indicates a causal relation. "于是“ is not necessarily focused on causal, but more on the flow of events.
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在公園學習 This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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今天我沒上班，打算整天在家玩遊戲、學習外語、打掃房間。 |
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可是流了幾小時以後我很無聊。 可是 |
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所以我決定去我家附近的公園。 所以我決定去我家附近的公園。 I'm not sure if it's a variation that I'm just not used to, but 所以 at the beginning of a sentence sounds odd in formal writing to me, unless it's in the context of a question: https://hinative.com/zh-CN/questions/378747 (It's kind of like using a subordinating conjunction in a sentence without an independent clause.) I would merge it with the last sentence or reword it a bit. |
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不但我有空，而且天氣很好，所以我覺得去公園是個不錯的想法。 |
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我把韓國小說和法果課本、手機等裝在我背包裡，然後出了門。 我把韓國小說 |
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公園離我家不遠，只要走十分鐘就可以到。 This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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一到公園，我坐在樹下，開始看書。 This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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看書以後，我學了一點法語文化。 This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
|
我覺得在公園裡學習很舒服。 This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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將來如果有機會我很想再一次去那裡。 This sentence has been marked as perfect! |
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