《十七岁和七十岁的两种爱情观》

我十七岁的自己: 坠入爱河是一次奇妙的冒险和发现之路。

我七十岁的自己: 不需要坠入爱河就能发现事物。
事实上，爱情是一种阻碍清晰视野的盲目。
如果你真的想发现什么，就做一个中立的观察者。
情感会降低我们的判断能力。

我17岁的自己: 每一次恋爱的机会都应该接受，因为人们会通过爱变得更加丰富。

我七十岁的自己: 大多数人常常把“爱”和“激情”混淆。
与其三心二意地爱许多人，不如全心全意地爱一个人。
深厚的浪漫关系涉及大量的时间、精力和责任。
由于个人时间和精力有限，与其开始新的关系，而不是招致新的麻烦。

我十七岁的自己: 当你爱一个人时，你会向他们展现真实的自我。

我七十岁的自己: 坦率地说，人们往往并不真正想了解你的真实面貌；
他们只对你能为他们做什么感兴趣。
很多时候，帮助他人最好的方式是保持低调，默默支持，让他们自己去经历和学习。

我十七岁的自己: 身体的亲密接触是爱的甜蜜表达。

我七十岁的自己: 性与爱之间的联系并不总是那么紧密。
没有性，也能体验到深刻的爱。
反之，肉体上的亲密也可能不包含爱。
更重要的问题是能量焦点：是更好的是追求感官的欲望，还是培养满足感？

我十七岁的自己: 总有一个完美的“灵魂伴侣”在等着你。

我七十岁的自己: 没有人是完美的。
通过长期的共同努力，伴侣可以变得对彼此来说“足够好”。
事实上，接受不完美是人生中宝贵的一课。

我十七岁的自己: 自发性是一种美德。
欲望既不应被邀请也不应被拒绝， 而应在它出现时被接受为一个自然过程。

我七十岁的自己: 克制也是一种美德。
许多欲望永远无法完全满足，只能暂时得到缓解。
满足旧欲望不仅令人筋疲力尽，而且很无聊。
如果你无法从旧的模式中学到任何新的东西，为什么要继续它们呢？
人们是通过执着于过去成长，还是通过探索新的领域成长？

总结：关于“爱”在人生不同阶段是如何被概念化的一些思考。
关键词: 人生阶段、解构爱情、爱情观念、浪漫主义观念、情欲与爱

辛迪：毫无疑问，随着年龄的增长，我们对爱情的看法会发生变化。

唐: 我发现，我内心存在着多种不同的声音。
这些声音往往各不相同，很少传递出单一明确的信息。
我能听到一阵嘈杂的信息在我的头骨里震动。

白罗：　很快，你现在占据的头骨就会变成空白。
也许那时，就会有真正的寂静。

2 Seasons of Love at Age 17 and 70

My 17-year-old self: Falling in love is a wondrous adventure & path to discovery.
My 70-year-old self: There's no need to fall in love to discover anything.
In fact, love is a form of blindness preventing clear sight.
If you really want to discover something, be a neutral observer –
Emotion reduces our capacity to discriminate.

My 17-year-old self: Each chance for love should be accepted since people become richer though love.
My 70-year-old self: Most people conflate "love" with "passion."
It is better to love person well than to love many half-heartedly.
Deep romantic relations involve a lot of time, energy, and responsibility.
Since your resources are limited, it's wiser to complete the relations you already have rather than invite any new dramas.

My 17-year-old self: When you love others, you show them who you really are.
My 70-year-old self: Frankly speaking, people do not want to see who you are –
They're merely interested in what you can do for them.
Often the best way to help others is to be invisible:
get out of the way to allow others to learn their core lessons.

My 17-year-old self: Physical intimacy is a blissful, tender expression of love.
My 70-year-old self: Love and sex have a tenuous connection.
It's possible to experience deep love without sex.
It is also to possible experience physical intimacy without any love.
A more important question is energy focus:
is it better to hanker after sensual longings or to cultivate contentment?

My 17-year-old self: There is a perfect "soulmate" waiting for you.
My 70-year-old self: No humans are perfect.
Through hard work over time, your partner can become "perfect enough" for you.
In fact, accepting imperfections is a valuable life lesson.

My 17-year-old self: Spontaneity is a virtue. Desire should be neither invited nor spurned,
but accepted as a natural process whenever it arises.
My 70-year-old self: Restraint is a virtue. Most desires are never satisfied, merely temporarily sated.
Attending to old desires is not only exhausting, but boring as well.
If you can't learn anything new from old patterns, why continue them?
Do people grow by clinging to the past, or by exploring new fields?

Summary: Some reflections on how "love" is conceptualized at different stages of life.
Keywords: life stages, deconstructing love, conceptions of love, romantic notions, eros vs. agape

Cindy : No doubt as we age, our perspectives on love change.

Don : What is I notice is that multiple perspectives coexist in myself.
The voices of different selves often differ, and seldom there is a single clear message.
I can hear a cacophony of messages vibrating throughout my skull.

Bai-Luo : Soon enough, the skull you occupy will become empty space.
Perhaps then there will be silence.