Feb. 17, 2021
Walk
About 2 years ago, I would take these walks down the neighborhood late at night. I brought my earphones too, so I could listen to calm piano music. There weren't many people outside because it was late, but occasionally a car would drive past and I would wave to them. Sometimes I could even see them shoot a smile back at me.
Also, when it snowed in the winter, I walked in the snow in warm clothes. It was absolutely freezing, but it was satisfying walking back and seeing my footsteps in the snow. Maybe if I got bored I would draw in the snow with my shoes. So if someone passed by, they would get to see a big smiley face in the snow.
WA walk
"a" is usually used with this word if using it as a noun.
About 2 years ago, I would take thessome walks down the neighborhood late at night.
"these" refers to specific items. "some" has a more generic connotation.
I brought my earphones too, so I could listen to calming piano music.
This change depends on your meaning. Calm piano music means the piano music is calm. Calming piano music means the piano music makes the listener calm (music itself may not be calm).
There weren't many people outside because it was late, but occasionally a car would drive past and I would wave ato them.
Sometimes I could even see them shoot me a smile back at me.
"shoot a smile back at me." sounds a bit awkward but grammatically not incorrect as far as I can tell. "Shoot me a smile" is more native.
Also, when it snowed in the winter, I would walked in the snow in warm clothes.
Using "when", "would" is used to make it conditional.
It was absolutely freezing, but it was satisfying walking back and seeing my footsteps in the snow.
So if someonebody passed by, they would get to see a big smiley face in the snow.
Feedback
Good job! I liked your story about a walk.
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Walk
"a" is usually used with this word if using it as a noun.
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About 2 years ago, I would take these walks down the neighborhood late at night. About 2 years ago, I would take "these" refers to specific items. "some" has a more generic connotation.
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I brought my earphones too, so I could listen to calm piano music. I brought my earphones too, so I could listen to calming piano music. This change depends on your meaning. Calm piano music means the piano music is calm. Calming piano music means the piano music makes the listener calm (music itself may not be calm).
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There weren't many people outside because it was late, but occasionally a car would drive past and I would wave to them. There weren't many people outside because it was late, but occasionally a car would drive past and I would wave at |
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Sometimes I could even see them shoot a smile back at me. Sometimes I could even see them shoot me a smil "shoot a smile back at me." sounds a bit awkward but grammatically not incorrect as far as I can tell. "Shoot me a smile" is more native.
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Also, when it snowed in the winter, I walked in the snow in warm clothes. Also, when it snowed in the winter, I would walked in the snow in warm clothes. Using "when", "would" is used to make it conditional.
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It was absolutely freezing, but it was satisfying walking back and seeing my footsteps in the snow. |
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Maybe if I got bored I would draw in the snow with my shoes. |
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So if someone passed by, they would get to see a big smiley face in the snow. So if some |
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