basiliomagno's avatar
basiliomagno

Aug. 15, 2021

0
Deceiving Appearences

The objects looks different when being seen from far away. The reality deceive us. Grasping all its nuances is an impossible task. The best minds have tried to achieve it, or to explain why the very attempt is naive.

I'm looking at a mountain I just hiked. From here it looks beutiful. The grass seems to be at a perfect height. There are cows walking through it calmly.

Before, when I was on the grass of the mountain, I realized I wasn't as perfect as it looked. It was extremely high, and the mountain's inclination was so steep that I should help myself with my hands.

Corrections

A Deceiving Appeareances

The objects looks different when being seen from far away.

I assume we're talking about some object rather than many (though maybe I'm wrong based on the intended title). Saying "the object" sounds too vague to me.

The reality deceives us.

Grasping all its nuances is an impossible task.

Though saying "impossible task" is not wrong by any means, I think leaving out "task" is more natural for this sentence.

The best minds have tried to achieve it, or to explain why the very attempt is naive.

I think no comma is better since we are not connecting independent clauses. That is, the "best minds" are doing both actions. Otherwise, great job! Very poetic.

I'm looking at a mountain I just hiked.

From here it looks beautiful.

The grass seems to be at a perfect height.

There are cows walking through it calmly.

Before, when I was ostanding in the grass of the mountain, I realized I wasn't as perfect as it looked.

I wasn't sure whether to correct this one because it sounds *almost* natural. It's a tough call.

It was extremely high, and the mountain's inclination was so steep that I should helphad to brace myself with my hands.

I'm guessing you'd be bracing yourself by crouching and pressing your hands into the ground. The sentence sounds a bit vague though I kind of know what you're getting at.

Feedback

Awesome writing! I like your style; it's rather poetic and introspective. Keep up the great writing!

basiliomagno's avatar
basiliomagno

Aug. 17, 2021

0

Thank you!

Deceiving Appearences

A Deceiving Appeareances

The objects looks different when being seen from far away.

The objects looks different when being seen from far away.

The reality deceive us.

The reality deceives us.

Grasping all its nuances is an impossible task.

Grasping all its nuances is an impossible task.

The best minds have tried to achieve it, or to explain why the very attempt is naive.

The best minds have tried to achieve it, or to explain why the very attempt is naive.

I'm looking at a mountain I just hiked.

From here it looks beutiful.

From here it looks beautiful.

The grass seems to be at a perfect height.

There are cows walking through it calmly.

Before, when I was on the grass of the mountain, I realized I wasn't as perfect as it looked.

Before, when I was ostanding in the grass of the mountain, I realized I wasn't as perfect as it looked.

It was extremely high, and the mountain's inclination was so steep that I should help myself with my hands.

It was extremely high, and the mountain's inclination was so steep that I should helphad to brace myself with my hands.

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