Writing prompt
Name the items around you and identify their colors.My bedroom
Open to any feedback
What is in my room? I'm in my bedroom, around me it's my bunkbed and above the bed are my sky-blue sheet and my blue cushion, I have also a small Desk in my room and above the desk are my copy books, some books, my ointment , some perfums , ETC. you can find as well, my black suitcase and inside there is many clothes like underwear, Pants, jeans, t-shirts. I have also a smart Tv , an Air Conditional and Fan
My bedroomBedroom
I'm in my bedroom., around me it's my My bunkbed is nearby and aboveon the bed are my sky-blue sheetsheets and my blue cushion,pillow.
I have also a small Deskdesk in my room and above the desk are my copy books, some other books, my ointment, some perfums perfumes, ETCetc.
you can find as well, myI also have a black suitcase and inside there isare many clothesitems of clothing like underwear, Pantspants, jeans, and t-shirts.
I have alsoAdditionally, there is a smart Tv , an Air Conditionalair conditioner, and Fana fan.
I added “additionally” to avoid redundancy of two sentences starting with “I have.”
I'm in my bedroom, around me it's next to my bunkbed, and above the bed are my which has a sky-blue sheet and my blue cushion.,
If you are saying that your bed has a blue sheet and blue cushion on it, then this sounds pretty natural.
I have also a small Deskdesk in my room, and above the desk are my copy books, some other books, my ointment, some perfums perfumes, ETCetc.
"copy books, some books" is a bit repetitive. just like you used "copy" to describe the first set of books, you could describe the second set too
youYou can also find as well, my black suitcase, and inside there is which has many clothes in it like underwear, Pantspants, jeans, and t-shirts.
I think this sounds more natural
I have also a smart Tv TV, an Air Conditionalair conditioner and Fana fan.
you could also add a comma after "conditioner" but it's not required TV is an abbreviation and so should be capitalized air conditioner is not an abbreviation, so it can stay lowercase but if you said AC for air conditioning, then it would be an abbreviation and would need to be capitalized
Overall feedback
nice job describing your surroundings
I'm in my bedroom., around Around me it'sis my bunkbed and above the bed are my sky-blue sheet and my blue cushion,/
'around me' starts a new thought and also sort of serves as the subject. You can also think of it as 'my bunkbed is around me.'
I have also have a small Deskdesk in my room and above the desk are my copy bookstextbooks, some other books, my ointment , some perfumsperfumes , ETCetc.
-Also often comes before the verb. -I have not heard the phrase copybooks, although I looked it up and it's a real word. I just hear textbooks more often. -Because you introduced one type of book, it makes sense to talk about another type of book as well. -etc. is never capitalized.
youYou can find as well, my black suitcase and inside there isare many clothes like underwear, Pantspants, jeans, t-shirts.
-As well is correct, but it sounds a little strange. 'You can also find' would sound better.
I also have also a smart Tv TV, an Air Conditionalair conditioner, and Fana fan.
You only need to capitalize proper nouns like place names, acronyms (TV), and words at the beginning of a sentence.
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