My troubles in practicing writing in Japanese

僕は全く日本語で書くのはそっちのけこときてしまった。本当に自分に怒鳴りたい。一か月ぐらいには全然文章を練習しなくてきたんです。でも、今から、続いて頑張るのはできるものだけです。いえ、頑張らなければいけません。それにしても、最も難しい部分は始めるのです。必ず、文章を書くのを考えるだけも時、イライラにする。例えば、「きちんと日本語で書けるのか」とか、「いつも上達しなければどうなる」とか、「別の言語で難し過ぎるです」と、自分の心に現れます。諦めるだめですけど、長い間にはなかなか書けません。やっぱり飽き性人です。それにしても、これを変わる方法を見つけなければいけません。

I have been completely pushing off writing in Japanese. I really want to yell at myself. This is because I have not been practicing writing compositions fir about a month. However, from now on, the only think I can do is continue and persevere. No, I have to persevere. Nonetheless, the hardest part (in writing) is beginning. Always, when I even just think of writing in Japanese, I get nervous. For instance, thoughts like, "can I properly write in Japanese," "what if I never improve," and "writing in another language is hard" appear in my mind. Giving up is not an option, but for long periods of time, I thoroughly am not able to write. Just as I thought, I'm a fickled person. Nevertheless, I have to find a way to change this.